A Friday Night Like This

I saw Vic passed out in the bathtub, blood everywhere. My heart was pounding, I could feel it in my ears. Please let him be okay.

'VIC!' Please don't let him be dead. He stirred, and my heartbeat slowed down somewhat.

'Vic! You're okay! Well, not okay, but alive! I'm going to call an ambulance.' I grabbed my phone and hit 911. My thumb was hovering above "call" when a frail voice said,

'No. Kellin, please.' I looked down at Vic, his brown eyes searching mine. I stared into his warm, comforting orbs, finding child-like fright and distress in them. I locked my phone and sat by his side.

'What do you need?' I asked, taking his good arm and prying his fingers off of the blade. I rubbed circles into his palm, trying to soothe him. He pointed at the bag which was sitting on the counter. I cleaned his cuts, apologising every time he hissed or winced. I bandaged his arm and slowly pulled his bracelets over them.

'Go to bed, Vic.' I say, helping him out of the tub. I pulled his shirt and shorts off for him and took them to the laundry. I go back to the bathroom and clean the tub and the blade. As I do, my thoughts wander.

~~~

'Vic, what's this?' I ask. It's been a few weeks of Vic and I knowing each other. We're at his house, writing our collab. It would soon be King For A Day, but we didn't know it yet.

'What's what?' He asks, confused. He grabs another pencil and starts scribbling away. I read a few words as I reach for his arm.

"I take a look up at the sky"

'This,' I say. I flip his arm over, and point out a few red marks. 'Did you draw on yourself with Sharpie?'

'Oh that,' He says, tugging his arm back. 'It's nothing.' I immediately get a sense that this isn't nothing. He didn't confirm that it was Sharpie. We continue writing and I "accidentally" bump his arm - the same one with the marks. He clenches his teeth and hisses.

'What the fuck, Kellin?' He says, anger ruining his coffee-coloured spheres.

'I knew it wasn't nothing Vic. You can trust me.' I take his arm again and he watches warily as I lift his sleeve and remove his bracelets. I kiss his scars, and I can feel his smile.

'Stealing my lyrics, are we?'

'Not intentionally, but please, promise me Vic. Never again. I don't want you to hurt yourself.' I slipped his bracelets back on, and pulled down his sleeve.

'I can't make promises, but I'll try my hardest.' I felt my eyes narrow slightly, but I relaxed as I realised this was the best answer I was going to get.

'That's good enough. Back to song writing?' I suggest, picking up a pencil and placing it in his hand.

~~~

I throw the blade away after cleaning it, and follow Vic to the bedroom. He's sleeping. He's lost a lot of blood. I don't really blame him. I get under the covers with him and hold him close, my arms wrapped around him. He makes a contented noise in his sleep and snuggles into me. I fall asleep listening to his uneven breathing.

- - -

I wake up, and Vic isn't in my arms anymore. There's a few drops of dry blood on the sheets, probably from where his cuts leaked through my sloppy bandaging.

'Look, I fucked up really badly. I can't do this anymore. I love him, but it's driving me mad.' I heard Vic talking on the phone, and I shot up and out of bed faster than you could say "Vic". I crept to the door. He was in the hallway.

'Yes... I know... I'm sorry, okay? I can't do this. It's killing Kellin. He deserves better...' Better? He's the best person I know! And what's killing me? The distance in our relationship? We're fixing it! I run a hand through my hair and dial our marriage counseling.

'Hello, Smith Marriage Counseling. Misty speaking, how may I help you?' Misty's voice is very professional and clipped. It's usually more relaxed and carefree.

'Hi Misty, it's Kellin. Kellin Fuentes. I was just wondering when my next appointment is.' I said hurridly.

'Oh, I'm so sorry, sir. If you could come down to the clinic straight away I'll explain everything.' Misty said.

'Uh... okay?' I said. What wass going on? Couldn't she just answer a question?

'See you soon, sir.' She hung up and I walked into the hallway. Vic had just finished his phone call.

'Vic, I need to go out for about half an hour. I'll be right back.' I moved in to give him a kiss on the cheek, but he stepped away.

'Whatever, Kellin. You don't have to inform me of every second of your life.' He stalked into the bedroom and slammed the door. I walked to the front door. Great. It was back to I-don't-give-a-shit-about-anyone-especially-my-husband Vic.

I reached the clinic and parked on the main street. I saw Misty wearing a pencil skirt, pointy shoes and a white long-sleeved blouse. Her hair was up in a tight bun. She was holding a cigarette, and dropped it and stomped it out when I arrived.

'Starbucks, let's go. I'll tell you when we get there.' Misty started walking, taking off her shoes and untying her hair.

'Why so formal?' I asked, jogging to catch up with her brisk pace.

'Part of what I need to tell you. Now hurry up. I only have a fifteen minute break.'

We reached the closest Starbucks and ordered.

'Hi, welcome to Starbucks. How may I help you?' Asked the barista, a perky girl who was probably just out of highschool. Misty stepped up.

'I'll have a hazelnut frappe, and Kellin here will have...' She trailed off and looked at me. I took my sunglasses off and perched them on top of my favourite woven hat. Iquickly scanned through the menu.

'An iced coffee thanks. One sugar.' The barista rang up our order, but when she looked up at me, her mouth dropped open.

'You're Kellin Quinn, right? Former Sleeping with Sirens lead man?'

'Uh, yeah.' I said, handing her twenty bucks. 'Aren't I a little bit old for your time period? It's been, what? Five years since Sleeping with Sirens have been together?'

'Um, yeah. I came upon your music the day the guys announced you had left the band. I listened to all their new stuff, but it's still pretty awesome seeing you. Some of the songs you sang are my favourites.' She smiled and passed me my drink. 'And don't worry about paying. Think of this as a thank you for being such an amazing singer.'

'Thank you. Would you like an autograph? Something?' I ask. I feel kind if bad. This really was a true fan. Hardly anybody knew me anymore, and while I was grateful at first, I found that my life had become empty and there was a big hole. That was where the fans had been.

'Thank you!' She gushed. I took a pen and signed a spare sheet of paper she had on her.

'Let's go, superstar.' Misty grumbled, taking my hand and pulling me through the door.

'Okay, look, Kellin,' Misty started, sipping her drink. 'We're under new management. A new guy came and took over the place last night. Dr Mason's been fired, as well as all our other long-term counsellors.'

'Do you know who the new guy is?' I asked, shock wearing off.

Misty shrugged. 'Not well. I'm just glad that he's allowed me to keep my job. There's not a lot of openings for a receptionist around here. I think his name's something like Pringle. Or maybe I'm just hungry. I don't know. I should've bought a slice or something.' Misty continued muttering to herself.

'Oh! Sorry, I almost forgot.' We had just arrived back at the clinic. I jumped, her sudden outburst startling me. Misty pulled out a pen and a piece of paper an scribbled something down.

'Here's Dr Mason's number. Call her. She may be able to drop by at your house or something and give you a session. I know how badly you need this.' Misty's eyes clouded over, and she gave me a small hug.

'Goodbye, superstar.'

Notes

Title cred: A Match Into Water - Pierce the Veil