For the rest of the night we watched a movie. Tony and I sat next to each other but tried our best to keep our hands off each other while Vic was there. Fortunately it was dark in the room so we could kiss every now and then without Vic even noticing. After the movie our conversation turned to their band and then to their girlfriends and then Vic dropped the bomb.

”When's your girlfriend coming back, man?” Vic asked Tony.

My eyes shot wide open but I tried to play it cool by coughing a little to cover up my facial expression. Tony's girlfriend? Didn't the two of them break up and that was the reason why Kelsey left? Or had Tony just forgotten to mention that he was still dating her?

”I don't know...” Tony said awkwardly, obviously noticing my sudden mood change. I got up from the couch and started walking towards the back door because it was the quickest way out.

”Thanks for the pizza,” I muttered and waved my hand, ”Bye.”

I stepped out and noticed that it was raining like it was the end of the world. It felt like a thunderstorm was coming so I started running to our backyard. But before I could reach my back door, somebody grabbed my hand and stopped me. I knew it was Tony even before I turned around to look at him.

”What do you want?” I asked, sounding somewhat rude but not even caring about that.

”Why are you angry, Abby?” he asked me. The rain got even worse and I could barely hear him over the sound of it.

”Did you just forget to mention that you actually didn't break up with Kelsey, huh?” I exclaimed.

My clothes were soaking from the rain already so it was too late to even try to stay dry.

”I'm sorry, okay? I just... I was so sick of all the fighting and I just wanted to be with somebody that could make me feel better and I knew I would've made you upset if I had told you,” he told me.

”So you used me to make you feel better because your girlfriend had left?”

”No!”

”Then why did you come to me? Why have you acted like you're single and interested in me if you really aren't?” I shouted. He grimaced and looked really sad as he stood in front of me in the pouring rain.

”Because I like you,” he admitted, ”I like spending time with you.”

”Bullshit. You only want sex.”

”No but you only want sex.”

”That's not true!”

”Do we have to fight about this? You know how much I hate fighting,” he said.

”I have nothing to say to you,” I muttered, ”Get off my yard. Please.”

”Abby – ”

”Now!”

”Abby please just listen to me!” he shouted suddenly and I flinched. I shut my mouth and waited for him to say what he had to say. He took a deep breath in.

”I'm sorry. Kelsey is still my girlfriend but we're on a break. She thinks I'm cheating on her and that's why she left. But... The more I spend time with you, the less I want to be away from you,” he told me, ”So, please, don't be angry at me.”

”Leave,” I said, ”Now.”

”I will if you want me to.”

”Go!”

”Okay, okay. I'm sorry, Abby, I really am,” he told me and touched my cheek before slowly walking back to his own yard and leaving me there slightly speechless. I stood there for a few minutes and the rain had already stopped when I went inside. I threw off my wet clothes and walked naked into the bathroom and took a very long, hot shower. And as I stood in the shower, I did some serious thinking.

I hadn't really realized that Tony was cheating on his girlfriend with me. I was the other woman and the more I thought about it, the more guilty I felt. I hadn't realized that I had done something wrong until it had really hit me that, wow, Tony had a girlfriend and he shouldn't have been sleeping or even spending time with me. I decided that I had to stop seeing Tony because, a) he had a girlfriend, b) I wasn't going to take the blame if they broke up and c) I wanted to find my own boyfriend, somebody that wasn't already in a relationship with somebody else.

After the shower I put on my most comfortable clothes and found my way to my favourite spot in that house which was the couch. It had become my comfort and I spent so much time on it that it was really pathetic, actually. I put on The Notebook and got ready to cry my eyes out.

After a few minutes of watching the movie, the doorbell rang. I paused the movie and went to open the door and when I saw Tony's face, I sighed deeply.

”What are you doing here?” I asked him.

”Can we talk? Please?” he begged.

I shrugged but allowed him to come in anyway. I followed him into the livingroom and watched as he sat down on the couch.

”Look, you have no idea how upset I am,” he started and I snorted, ”I'm serious. I hate fighting and I've upset two women in just a few days' time. I just... I wish we could at least be friends...”

”Friends? I've lost a lot of respect for you,” I muttered, ”I don't understand how you have the guts to walk in here and wish that we could be friends.”

”What did I do that was so wrong, Abby?” he asked.

”You forgot to mention that you still had a girlfriend when you came here and had sex with me, that's what!”

”So what? You knew I had a girlfriend before that and yet you wanted to sleep with me. Remember a few weeks ago, at the party, she was in the livingroom while we were in my room, huh? You didn't have a problem back then.”

”Yeah but that was different! And don't you dare and try to blame me for this. I only came here to have a fun summer and lots of sex,” I muttered.

”So what do you want to do from now on?” he asked me.

”I want you to leave because I was in the middle of watching a movie,” I said.

”I was talking about us.”

”There is no us,” I said.

”But you have feelings for me, don't you, Abby?” he asked and I sort of froze for a moment.

Did I have feelings for him? I did, didn't I? Secretly I hoped that he was my boyfriend and that he cared about me the way I cared about him.

”I...” I didn't know what to say.

”So you do,” he nodded, ”Why do you act so tough if you really want to be with me?”

”Because the way you act isn't fair for anybody but yourself,” I muttered, ”You have a girlfriend back home and you have me here. You get the best of both worlds while Kelsey gets to have you most of the year and I only get, what, three months a year.”

”Yeah but... We agreed that we would keep our feelings out of this. We were supposed to be nothing but fuck buddies, friends with benefits,” he said quietly. He looked at me like he felt sorry for me, like I was some sort of a charity case. I felt disgusted.

”I don't want that anymore. I want more than this. I want to mean the world to somebody. I want more. I want somebody to love me. And if it isn't ever going to be you that can give me that then I have to start looking for somebody that can,” I said really quietly.

”I guess that's it, then,” he said and stood up, ”This is where we go our separate ways.”

”Really?”

”Isn't that what you want?”

”No... I mean, yeah, but...” I sighed and buried my face in my hands. What was I going to do? I mean, I didn't want to completely stop seeing him but then again, if I kept seeing him, I would feel awful. But... It was Tony, my Tony.

”I don't want to, like, completely lose you,” I admitted quietly. God, why was I so bad at that kind of stuff? Why couldn't I just tell him to leave and never come back?

”What do you mean?”

”I mean that, uh, you're really important to me,” I finally admitted.

”What do you want, Abby?” he asked quietly.

”I want a boyfriend like you, Tony. What do you want?”

”I don't know what I want,” he said and sighed, ”I just... I wanted to spend a carefree summer but then all this fucking drama happened.”

”Well... What are we going to do?” I asked.

He shrugged and stepped closer to me, placing his hands on my waist. I allowed him to pull me close to his body and I rested my cheek against his chest, listening to his breathing and steady heartbeat for a moment.

”You've made me change my mind about so many things recently,” he murmured, ”And you're really important to me, Abby. I feel the need to comfort and protect you.”

”But you're so young. You're too young,” he continued, ”And I'm afraid that if we got together, it wouldn't last. And... You live in New York and I live in San Diego and... There are too many things that would make it too complicated.”

I knew that he was absolutely right. There was no way we could've made our relationship work and it had started to seem like Tony didn't even want to. I mean, I couldn't expect for him to like me enough to dump Kelsey for me. And I wasn't even sure about my own feelings. Why was everything so hard suddenly?

”I better go,” Tony whispered and pulled away from me. I followed him to the front door and watched as he stepped out.

”I hope you have a good rest of the summer,” he said, waved his hand, and was gone before I even realized it. Did I just get dumped by somebody that I wasn't even in a relationship with?