I’m standing backstage, at the House of Blues, in Los Angeles, with one of my favorite cousins, Melody, as we watch my best friend’s show. Pierce The Veil is the name. We’re with them tonight because they love us. “Tiff! They’re actually really good!” she speaks into my left ear. I nod smiling as I get a glimpse of her appearance. She’s wearing a cute red top with black jeans,black and white vans, and her black medium length hair is down. She has a small face with chinky eyes, that are brown, and a good attitude towards life. I wish I could always be like that... Then I turn back to the performance.

Vic, the shortest one of all, is singing beautifully into the Microphone, holding his white guitar. Jaime, my crazy hair fella, is jumping everywhere, strumming his bass. Tony, the other badass guitarist, that has a Padiwan braid. And last but not least, Mike’s slamming his drums as he head bangs everywhere.

Tonight is one of those nights where you just wanna let loose and have fun. And watch your best friends rock out on stage. I look at the crowd and they are going NUTS! Big, awesome crowd. These boys really know how to put up a show. I’m so proud of them.

I glance at Mike and he’s doing a goofy face at me. I chuckle as I flick him off. He sticks his tongue out and continues head banging to his drumming. He’s the homie. I don’t even know how long I’ve known him, but it goes back to our teen years. We always kept in contact, even when I’m many miles away. He’s the third brother I never had.

I met Tony and Jaime when I moved to San Diego. Even though, I’ve been here many times to hang with Mike, I just met them officially. Mike always talked about them and them as a band together. Vic, on the other hand, we just met. More specifically, over a year ago. Mike always spoke so highly of him, and when we finally met, we clicked fast! And I mean fast.

I turn to Vic and a smile perks up on my face. He’s doing his little moon walk dance. It’s cute and super dorky of him. I can say he’s the silliest in my eyes. We’re always together when he’s not touring the world. We have, I guess you can say, a special bond. He’s my best friend.

I’ve actually been smiling a lot today. It’s unusual. But, it’s probably cause I’m around good people.

Moving to San Diego with my three favorite cousins, Melody, Tanya, and Sara is one of the best decisions I have ever made. I love it here and will continue to have my journey here.

I’m in the bus and I’ve decided to change into my blue jean shorts and a black zip up sweater. I like to get comfy for this new summer night. I walk out the bus door, and I see some of the guys outside. The crew’s doing their thing, loading the equipment into the bus. I look to the side and I see Mike and Vic, chilling. I relentlessly walk over, and stand in-between them, and I’m feeling really short. Vic is about four inches taller and Mike’s 7 inches taller. Yeah, I’m not that tall. Vic looks at me and smiles, “It’s cold! Ice cold!” I exclaim, acting silly like a little kid. He stares at me for a second and then bursts into laughter. He then wraps his arms around my waist, and lifts me up, squeezing me, making me squeal into laughter. “Put me down!” I shout and he does eventually but, still laughing. I look at him and pinch his right cheek, giggling. He sticks his tongue out, somewhat enjoying it because he’s smiling. Weirdo, and I laugh at him. I turn to look at Mike and notice Jaime blabbing it off with him. Oh jeez.

I’m really starting to shiver. So, I grab Vic’s arm, hugging it like a pillow, and feeling little warmth, from this little man. He looks at me and grins, “Cold?” I nod, jumping up and down once. I see the giggles on his face and he wraps his arms around my waist, pulling me into a bear hug. I look up at him while hugging his tiny waist. He’s wearing a diamond sweater. It’s black and the word ‘Diamond’ is in a blue color, and of course, a big silver diamond is in the middle. It’s really cool. I’ll have to borrow it sometime. He lets me borrow his stuff sometimes and wonders why he’s missing things. lol I always give it back. Eventually. Haha. He’s also wearing a snapback that he is wearing backwards. I like how he wears it. It goes with him. He’s watching the boys while I squeeze him.

We’re watching the crew load the last of the equipment and Jaime’s now making fun of Mike, telling him he’s a weirdo for liking Harry Potter. “Dude! That’s crazy that you like it that much!” Jaime shouts, smiling at Mike. Mike rolls his eyes as he shakes his head, “At least I can handle a small needle.” he smiles like he has won. Jaime immediately frowns, embarrassed a little. He always had a bad time with needles. Even though he has a few tattoos, he’s still afraid of it. “Ohhhhhh!!!!!!” Vic and I exclaim looking at Jaime, with a big O in our mouths. He’s shrugging with a frown. We wait for his comeback and nothing. “Whatevers.” he finally says and walks off. Mike quickly follows him and hugs him from behind, smiling and Jaime’s chuckling. “Aw.” I say smiling. Vic chuckles at the two, “Those are men right there.” I laugh and say, “Only real men know how to hug.” I say sarcastically looking at him. He chuckles looking down to my face, “I think, I’m a pretty real man.” he smirks. I shake my head, “Eh.” and burst out laughing. He frowns and lets go of me, bringing his arms to his sides. “No!!!” I exclaim grabbing him back. “I’m cold!” I shout holding him tightly around his waist as I lay my head on his chest. “That’s right!” and I know he’s smiling.

We are now on our way to San Diego, and Melody and I are gonna have to go home after their San Diego show.

I’m in the back and Melody’s chillin with her main Bitch, Tony, in the front. They be drinking whiskey. Vic walks over to me with an acoustic guitar and Mike follows closely behind. “Hey.” Vic smiles sitting beside me and then turns to look at me. He’s looking jolly and Mike’s topless. “Did you like the show?” He’s curious. I answer staring at him as he does, “It was awesome. I really like the song Hold On till May.” I grin. I can relate. He grins blushing. “You know, I wrote that for my ex-girlfriend who had a bad childhood growing up.” he explains. I look at him in awe, “That’s sweet of you.” I grin and he’s now smiling. “What happened between you two?” He shrugs, “I guess the love was out of control.” I look at him, “I see what you did there..” and we burst into laughter. He has a cute smile. It’s dorky. Mike exclaims looking at us, “Dude! You gotta hear her sing!”

Vic immediately looks at me, “You sing?” I nod shrugging my shoulders, “A bit.” and grin a blush. I don’t really show it off because I don’t care. It’s not a talent or whatever. It’s just my voice. I guess. He then begins strumming his guitar. I recognize the beat, and it’s Hold On Till May. “Vic, I’m not gonna sing.” I say shaking my head. “And why not?” he frowns at me, stopping his strumming. I shrug my shoulders. Then, Tony and Melody run towards me, pulling me by the arm, and then rushing me to the front yelling, “Cake!” I look back and Vic and Mike are laughing at me.

I love these people.

I’m saying goodbye to Mike, “Have fun with the rest of the tour, dawg.” I speak into his right ear as we hug. “You know I will, dawg.” We pull away and I look at him and giggle. I turn to my right, and I see Tony and Melody cracking up. I wonder why. They’re always so silly towards each other. Then, I look past Mike and see Vic talking to Gabe, the guitar tech. Mike turns back to look at him and then back to me, “He’s gonna miss you.” I grin, “Oh hush. It’s you that’s gonna miss me.” He shrugs, “True.” and we hug once more. “See ya later.” I smile at him and he walks off, heading towards the crew. I turn to Vic and he’s smiling, broadly, walking slowly towards me. “Hey.” I say. “Hi.” he says back. “The past three days were fun. Thanks for bringing me on this tour.” I smile, shyly. Why am I being shy!?!?! “No problem. You should come with us more often. So we can hang and shit.” he’s smiling while moving his hands around, trying to be a gangster, as he says that last sentence. He’s silly. I chuckle nodding at him, “I’d like that.” I start. “Dude, I got you good last night!” I’m proud of myself. I hid all his clothes in my bunk and stuffed his bags with XL grandma undies. He was very pleased. He’s laughing, “True. Yeah, I’ll give you that.” he’s smiling at me. I stop my laughing because I’m gazing back with a smile. I don’t know why, but I don’t wanna look away. I watch his smile fade away and he’s gazing back. It looks like he’s wondering why we’re like this. Right now.

“Tiff! We gotta get going!!” I hear Melody shout and we brake our gaze, turning to look at her. I nod and turn back to him. I sigh disappointingly, “Gotta get going.” I go in for a hug. I have my arms around his neck, feeling his hands wrapped around my hips, and our chests pressed against one another. It’s warm. I’m going to miss him. A lot.. We pull slightly away, partly in our holding position, and gazing passively at each other. I’m caught… He’s staring back with his big brown eyes. They’re like drinking into my eyes. And then I see him look down at my lips… What??! Shit! Turn away!!! And I do. WHAT’S GOING ON?!? I think of something to say..

“Have fun, Victor. Don’t get too freaky with the groupies.” I wink at him as I pull completely away. He’s chuckling, “Tiffany and her jokes.” and he gives me a smile. We walk towards Melody a little, “Tiff.” he says. I stop and turn to look at him, “I’ll see you soon.” He’s not smiling. He’s serious. His expression has nostalgic and maybe…. desire. And it’s odd to see him like this.. I grin and nod, “I’ll be waiting for our next hang shesh, darling.” and he smiles wide.

What was that whole gazing and looking at my lips for?! Oh no..

The next few weeks have passed and I’ve been working and trying to just live life. I work with an awesome business and management company that sells clothing. The line is called ‘Live In Love’. It’s created by these people who truly live in love. They’re all awesome and I’m lucky to be working with them. I do strongly believe in “Live In Love” Ha, you’re funny. I am back and fourth between Orange County, LA, and San Diego, managing three stores. And often visiting my dad in the San Fernando Valley, my home away from home. Who am I kidding? I’ve always been close to my cousins. They’re all hoes. lol jk. They’re awesome. We live in this beautiful, garden like, two story house, in the beautiful area of San Diego, California.

I get a text from Vic,

“I’m back from tour! Let’s run the beach! :)”

“Finally!! :D And yes!”

I’m totally gonna do it. I love running.

I wrap my long layered black hair in a pony tail and I put on my white sports bra top and then black running shorts. Then, I slide on my light blue, pink, and black Nike running shoes that I love, causing to expose most of my tattoos. You could see my back tattoos: Red and blue Roses going down my left side back, Dream catcher on my right top back. As for my thighs, cherry blossoms going down my right thigh and this very inspirational quote from Buddha on my left side thigh. My figure is lean and curvy. Suitable for me.

I drive, using my all black, leather seats, tinted windows, Lexus to Vic’s pad. I ring the door bell and it’s Mike. “Woah!” he exclaims looking at me down and up. He’s in a no sleeve shirt, and I can tell he’s been smoking weed by the smell of him. I chuckle, “Stop it.” and he points his finger to his cheek and I kiss him there. He giggles and I push him aside.

I walk in and I see Vic stretching near the couch. I join him by his side and he looks to his right and laughs, “I’m so gonna beat you!” I say reaching down to my feet. He laughs hysterically, “We’ll see!” Mike’s by my side and grabs the right side of my stomach and squeezes it. I giggle at him, “Are you sure you don’t wanna join us?” He does a gushy face, rubbing his no belly, “I’m too tired.” I frown, “Lame.” and we are now on our way to the beach.

We walk slowly and it’s nice.

I just remembered what happened three weeks ago.. The gazing.. Was it nothing?

The breeze is, of course, breezy and refreshing. He laughs about how the tour was. “I can’t believe she just grabbed your face and kissed you.” I mimic what happened. He chuckles, “Aw man. You don’t even know.” I shake my head laughing, “Vic fucking Fuentes! Single ass fuck!!!” I shout on the beach, turning people’s heads. “When he shouldn’t be.” I smile at the world with my fists on my hips. He giggles, “Why do you say that?” I shrug, “Cause you’re too wonderful to be single.” He turns to me and grins, blushing really. I don’t notice it. “Whoop! Let’s go!” and we run the beach. Nonstop.

We come to a stop near the life guard post and I breath heavenly while placing my hands on my knee, trying to catch my breath. “Woah!” Vic breaths heavenly pacing back and fourth in a circle. “You can run.” I chuckle proudly, “Told you.” I’m finally able to stand up straight and I see Vic gazing ridiculously at this girl. She’s sitting with her girlfriends, in her bikini, and she looks happy. She has brown hair, light skin, and a few tattoos.

I just realized it’s his ex-girlfriend, Samantha. I pat him on his shoulder and he loses his gaze to me, “Let’s go home.” I smile. He nods and we make our way.

He’s completely quiet and I try breaking the silence by talking about food. Because I am hungry. But, he just wouldn’t respond in a good way. We walk into his house and he quickly goes into his shower. I have my stuff in the car and once I got it, I rushed into Mike’s shower.

20 minutes later, I finish, and I see the fog on the mirror. I can’t help but wipe it off with my arm. I stare blankly at the girl with shining brown chinky eyes. High cheek bones and a small birth mark on her right cheek. She tries to put up a smile, erasing the bad thoughts that comes across her mind. She feels pain. She feels desire. She’s really just hurting..

Maybe I’ll call Steven tonight to avoid the pain...

Then, after putting on some shorts and a tank, I walk slowly into Vic’s room and he’s strumming his guitar like nothing. I sit on his desk chair, and he grins a wave. “Good run huh?” I ask. He nods, “I never knew you could run so well. It explains your incredible body.” I immediately look up at him, blushing because of what he just said. “Thanks. I didn’t know you couldn’t.” He chuckles loudly, “Oh, how I love you so.”

“I like… I like bananas.” He says randomly, fixing his guitar. I giggle at him and suggest to get some but, he doesn’t want any. “Are you okay? I know you saw Samantha.” I watch him stare at his guitar. He stutters, “I’m… Fine.” he pauses. “I broke up with her because it didn’t feel right. And she only wanted sex.” he shrugs glancing at me and then back at the guitar. I stare at him. “What!?! Vic Fuentes turns down sex!?!?” I exclaim sarcastically. He laughs and nudges me, and I fall onto the bed. I giggle sitting back up, “You’ll be fine.” and gestures his shoulder. He smiles, “I find love to be a powerful thing..” he says. “I hear it is.” I say sarcastically and we laugh. “Have you ever been in love?” I ask, curiously looking at him. He looks up at me and grins, “Yes, but in all the wrong places.” I look at him confused. He’s wearing that snapback backwards and a red t-shirt. “Have you?” he asks, looking at me. I immediately look down, “Not sure..” I say softly. He gestures my left cheek with his hand to make me look at him, “You’ll be fine.” and he smiles. His gesture.. Oh..

He starts to strum his guitar and I recognize that the beat is Hold On Till May. He looks at me and grins. “Play it.” I say.

He sings, and of course it’s beautiful.

Then, he made me sing the girl part.

“If you were me, you’d do the same. Cause I can’t take it anymore. I’ll draw the shades and close the door. Everything's not alright and I would rather...”

I didn’t realize my eyes were closed as I sang that part. When I open them, I see Vic staring at me. Like if I just said something daring or I don’t know. His eyes are glistening and he’s just not saying anything.

Notes

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