Login with:

Facebook

Twitter

Tumblr

Google

Yahoo

Aol.

Mibba

Your info will not be visible on the site. After logging in for the first time you'll be able to choose your display name.

An Alternate Ending

An Alternate Story

Most people think I’m mad, crazy or even just stupid but I like to think I’m just brave. What else can I really call it without scaring myself. For all I know everything I ever do is actually a dream? Everything anyone ever does could be a dream. What if life is the dream and “reality” is actually the real deal? We’ll never really know will we. I had a dream once, about a life I could have with someone special and it ended badly. And due to that, I haven’t seen him since that day. At first I thought it was funny, ironic even that I could ever really picture a full life with him but to find my death within that story was just too much. I mean the complications in which I died could possibly happen in real life. But the reality is that it was exagerated to make a point; that loving Oliver Sykes would be the death of me. And that is why, 6 years on I’ve avoided him since that day.

Now I don’t really believe in bad omens or “signs” if you will but something about that story made my blood run cold. Everything seemed off by it, and nothing can take away that feeling. Of course it doesn’t diminish the wonder. What if I could actually be with someone like Oli Sykes? He was after all a really good friend and we shared one kiss together. If that meant anything at all to him, but did it mean anything to me?

After Christmas 2008 I moved to Australia, got away from everything and pretended that life was fantastic. It took me a while but I moved on, and I met someone new. I thought I was in love with him but I realised not too long ago it wasn’t love. It was just a really nice friendship. He didn’t agree but it’s not really his choice, he couldn’t make me love him. We did get married, which is kinda weird for me. It wasn’t a big wedding or anything like that but it was nice. Peaceful even. My mum, dad and Matt did come over for it but I begged him not to tell anyone else. Which I’m thankful for. My life isn’t really for anyone else to comment on.

When the marriage ended I realised my time in Australia had ended too, so I got on a plane to Sheffield and bought a new apartment. It wasn’t massive or fancy, it was just different I guess. And that’s where I am now. On the roof of this apartment in the middle of Sheffield.
Tomorrow was a huge day for my brother. And his band. They sold out Wembley Arena. I haven’t really been there for him in the past few years and we grew apart. He doesn’t know I’m back though. No one does except my mum and dad. They aren’t telling Matt so that I can surprise him at the show tomorrow night.

My phone began buzzing in my pocket and I pulled it out. I looked at the name flashing on the screen. Lee, how did he even get my phone number? I clicked the answer button and place the phone at my ear. “Hello?” I asked.

A small laugh came through the receiver. “A little birdie told me you’re back in town” He said softly. I smirked a little and pulled my cigarettes out of my pocket, put one in my mouth and lit it.

“Another little birdie told me my brothers band sold out Wembley Arena” I puffed out.

“Oh you heard about that one? it’s no biggie like” He tried to sound casual.

“Are you not shitting yourself yet?” I laughed, taking another draw of my cigarette.

“Absoutely, but it’s gonna be amazing” He laughed. He sounded so nervous.

“Well I’m excited to see you guys kick ass. What time you on at?” I asked with a small smirk.

“You’re coming?” He sounded shocked. “I think around 9:30“ He said quickly.

“I’ll make sure to be there but don’t let anyone know yeah?” I laughed.

“Of course not” He replied.

“How did you even know in the first place?” I asked, curious since no one else knew.

“Was at your mums house 2 days ago, overheard her mention your name and nearly shat myself. You’ve got a lot to answer for Case” He sounded stern.

“Oh give me a break man, I’m just home” I sighed. “I’ve got a lot to tell you guys but you need to take things easy with me right? I just went through a really shitty break up” I laughed nervously.

“It’s not gonna be half as bad as Oli’s relationship drama trust me. On and off all the time, now they’re fucking engaged and no one can understand why. She is clearly with him for money and fame, he’s with her because he hates to be alone ever since the drugs incident” Lee said all of this as if it was the most casual thing in the world. What the hell have I missed?

“Wait what?” I was so confused.

“Which part?” He laughed. I finished my cigarette and threw the butt away.

“He was on drugs?” I asked, nerves starting to fill me.

“Yeah he was on cocaine for a bit then Ketamine. Was really awful to be honest but he got help”
I felt my stomach drop, I don’t know which upset me more. Hearing that Oli has a fiance or that he had a drug problem.

“Oh, well as long as he’s better now right?” I tried to sound like I wasn’t completely devastated.

“Yeah well you can decide for yourself when you see him” Lee said softly, maybe he was trying to soften the blow for me. It’s like he knows how difficult this is going to be for me.

“Well I need to go, got a big day tomorrow and all. I’ll see you guys there okay” I had to get off the phone. I had to go and calm my head down.

“Okay, I can’t wait to see you okay. See you tomorrow” Lee
I put my phone back in my pocket and left the roof. The idea of sitting here all night and going through my problems one by one didn’t seem like a great plan to me. Plus I have an early flight to London tomorrow afternoon. So I picked my sorry ass up and went to bed, to attempt sleep.

----

This being the first time I had stepped foot in London since I lived here is quiet possibly the scariest thing I’ve ever experienced. Not that I wasn’t excited and more happy with my life now that I’ve grown up. I spent a horrible few years here and I never ever thought I’d be able to return without feeling some stray feeling of fear, well for what happened to me. This time it felt as though my stomach was going to be ripped out of my body. I couldn’t eat, sleep or drink anything in the past 12 hours because I feel as though I’m going to throw up everywhere.
My flight was delayed, so I wouldn’t get to Wembley Arena until like 8pm which isn’t exactly disreable but these situations can’t be helped. I decided to treat myself to a night in the Hilton next to the Arena. It was bloody expensive but I had no other choices really.
When I finally did arrive at the venue I met up with my mum. They were sat side stage, and I seen Oli’s mum. She looked so happy, proud of her boy and his best friends. Hell I was proud of them and I had barely seen them in 6 years. I sat down next to my mum and dad. They were so happy to see me and glad that I was back home again. For all they knew my life in Australia was amazing, which for awhile it was but my marriage was a sham and I couldn’t fake it anymore.

The rest of the last support band’s set flew in and my heart began racing. I spent the whole flight listening to the guys latest album. Of course I kept up to date with them, they were after all my family. It was just hard at times. Especially when Oli sounded so hurt and heartbroken on certain songs.

The lights went out and everyone screamed. People were so excited, happy to see their favourite band come on stage. My heart raced, seeing their faces for the first time in so long was going to be a huge deal for me. The choir effect they had for Shadow Moses blared from the PA system. The lights flashed and their background with the Flower of Life design swirled around the back of the stage. I spotted Matt Nicholls enter first behind his drum kit. Then Lee with his guitar. My brother entered next. He always looked so shy onstage. Jordan who I haven’t even met yet came onstage behind his keyboard. Then the man himself sauntered onstage. He glided over to his microphone and stood on his box. He opened his arms out and them screamed “Can you tell from the look in our eyes?” The crowd screamed back at him.

“We’re going nowhere” His smile lit up the whole room. The look on his face gave me goosebumps, he was so happy.

The crowd went absolutely mental at their songs. The song that got me the most was Hospital for Souls. It was as though Oli was telling a story. On some level we could all relate to it. The amount of power he had over that crowd of people was unbelievable. To think the last time I seen this band headline was in a dinky little pub outside Sheffield. And now they’re playing a sold out Wembley Arena show. If that’s not an achievement then I don’t know what is.

Matt suddenly looked up to where we were sitting and looked away. His head snapped back towards us as if he just realised something. His eyes lit up when they met mine. His smile was so big, I couldn’t help but begin crying. He walked over to Oli before they began the second last song and whispered something.

“What doesn't kill you makes you wish you were dead. Got a hole in my soul, growing deeper and deeper. And I can't take one more moment of this silence. The loneliness is haunting me. And the weight of the world's getting harder to hold up.” Oli stopped for a second and looked up into my direction. His eyes lit up and he couldn’t stop smiling.

“It come in waves, I close my eyes. Hold my breath and let it bury me." His voice ached as he sung. “I'm not okay, and it's not alright. Won't you drag the lake and bring me home again?” He looked back up at me again and I felt my palms sweat. It’ s not like we really even had a past, why am I feeling so nervous?

“Who will fix me now? Dive in when I'm down? Save me from myself, don't let me drown. Who will make me fight? Drag me out alive? Save me from myself, don't let me drown.”
His voice was intoxicating. He never really liked to show his voice, hence the screaming. It was like he wanted it hidden, no one was allowed to know he had a beautiful voice. It’s kinda fitting that one of the biggest songs they have ever done, had to be one he would sing properly on. And it is honestly so heartbreaking. I wonder why he wrote it?

After the show ended my mum and dad led me down into the dressing room area. The nerves built up in my stomach, every time the door opened I almost died from excitement and fear. But it was never any of them. “How was your time in Australia?” I heard. I looked round and noticed it was Oli’s mum.

“Hey, it was amazing. I had the best time ever over there” I smiled at her.

“I heard you got hitched?” She gave me a heartwarming look. I couldn’t help but smile.

“You heard correctly, but sadly it didn’t work out. Pretty much the only reason I’m here” I laughed. I watched her change from happy to sad.

“I’m sorry to hear that” She lightly touched my arm.

“Don’t sweat it, I’m okay. It just wasn’t meant to be” I smiled.

The door opened and 5 bodies sauntered into the room. My eyes were drawn to the bodies as they stared at me. All different reactions but all seemingly happy. Their parents and family all raced over to congratulate them on their big show. I walked over to Matt and he just hugged me. “I’m so glad you came” He mumbled into my shoulder.

“I couldn’t miss it” I grinned. He stood back and looked me over.

“You’ve definitely changed Casey, all these tattoos and piercings and the hair? Australia did you good” He laughed. “I’m actually beyond words right now” He was like an excited school girl.

“And it’s not just for one night Matt, I’m back permanently” I grinned at him. His eyes widened and he pulled me into his arms.

“This is the best Christmas present I have ever received” He was almost in tears.
I laughed at his reaction and pulled away. When I did I looked around and seen Oli standing, watching us. “I guess I need to go say hi right?” I asked Matt.

“You’d best do that” Matt pushed me on.
I walked over towards Oli and he smiled when I approached him. “Hiya love” He smirked. I can’t even begin to explain how much I have missed that smile.

“Hey” I couldn’t help but grin at him.

“Long time no see huh?” He cocked his head to the side and I rolled my eyes.

“I needed time away, so I went” I explained.

“People who need time away go on holiday, not up and move halfway across the world now do they love?” He looked down at me, amused with himself.

“Some people need half a decade away though” I shrugged.

“As you like. So what made you come to this show?” He asked, flicking his hair out of his eyes.

“Well I decided to move back to Sheffield since my sham of a marriage didn’t work out” I explained to him. His face looked disappointed.

“You were married? And you didn’t tell anyone?” He looked so confused.

“Well Matt knew, but I didn’t wanna get anyone involved. Things were complicated y’know” I couldn’t get into this now.

“Yeah, it’s pretty tough to explain to your mates that you’re off to Australia suddenly instead of going on tour with them. Sorry but what the fuck were you thinking? You didn’t even say goodbye! You just up and left, told me some bullshit story about how you could never be friends with us for long. What the hell were you thinking?” He blew up. Oh shit. “Are you insane? Are you like mentally incapable of understanding human feelings? I thought I had made it pretty obvious that I was in love with you and that’s how you react? Fuck me you’re selfish. Don’t even bother thinking you’re allowed to waltz back in here and I’ll just forget it all” He mumbled and pushed past me.

Maybe I should’ve just stayed in Australia.

Notes

Comments

I. LIKE. IT. I. WANNA. RREEEADDDD IT

Please update. I've been hooked on these stories and starting to read them a second time

@Janelle


It's slowly becoming mines too, thanks for reading and commenting

This story is life

@Madness


Thank you!