Rage, Rage Against the Dying of the Light
While I Weep-While I Weep!
Sunday, January Twenty Seventh, 8:39 P.M…
Mike and I hadn’t talked since Friday.
We hadn’t spoken a word. I had tried to talk to him, to apologize, but he had simply brushed me off, made an excuse to leave the room. “I’m going to bed early. ‘Night.” “I’m hungry.” All the excuses got him away from me. Vic tried to help me out by keeping Mike in one place, but the younger Fuentes brother always managed to disappear for a while.
My world was still just shades of black. I was just sadder and angrier by the day. I couldn’t get through to Mike. I don’t know the fate of Virgo. I couldn’t do anything to fix the situation.
Tony and I were chilling on the couch. He had tried to step up and be friendlier since Mike had basically jumped ship. He played with my hair. Jaime was trying to teach him to do a braid.
“No, no, Turtle. It goes OVER and then switch hands.” Jaime pointed out. I just chuckled quietly and smiled. Since Mike had pointed out that I wouldn’t let any of the others help me in any way, I tried to be at least a little more talkative. Friday night was a wakeup call. I needed to shape up or ship out.
“Like this?” Tony asked.
“Tony, you’re so gentle.” I chuckled quietly. He smiled and patted the top of my hair as soon as he finished the braid.
“Thank you, Rory. I don’t want to hurt you.” He giggled. Jaime flicked his nose, making him whine. Vic looked up at the two from across the front of the bus. The singer smiled happily.
Mike was still nowhere to be seen.
Tony mumbled in displeasure and runs his hands through my hair, gently taking the braid out. He stops for a moment, staring at my hair. I turn to face him. He pulls this goofy grin onto his face.
“Your hair looks better down.” He grins. I poke his shoulder and blush.
“Thanks, Turtle.” I smile wider. It was a true smile this time. A sound make me turn towards it. The back lounge has opened and closed again. Jaime yawns and walks over to Vic, sitting next to him with his head on the singer’s shoulder. Tony goes over to his bunk and hops in. I guess I should be going to bed soon as well. Everyone is pretty tired.
I get up, going towards the bunk. I see Mike shoving his phone into his pocket. I silently prepare myself for the storm that’s coming. He’s still pissed off at me. I just want to talk to him, but if he pushes me off one more time, I swear I’m going to punch him in the face.
I pass him by. He roughly bumps my shoulder. I whirl around, frowning.
“Hey, can I talk to you?” I whispered timidly, like I was a small child testing the temperature of a pool water by dipping her toe in first.
“I’m going to bed.” He excused himself before going towards the fridge. My face pulled into a frown. I wasn’t going to let him go so easily this time.
“Um, no you’re not.” I started, firmly planting my feet. He looked up from the fridge, a surprised expression on his face. I hadn’t fought back until now. He came forwards, looming over me. I stood my ground and tried not to look terrified. Jaime and Vic watched from the corner in muteness.
“Yes, I am. Now move…please.” He strained his voice. I didn’t say a word.
“Okay, I understand that you’re mad at me and you have a good reason why, but I’m trying to apologize and make this better-“
“You weren’t talking before and NOW you’re trying be friendlier?” He asked. His voice seemed to drop so low, I strained to hear it. My fists clenched together, as if I was about to swing at him. I restrained from doing so.
“Mike please just listen to me.” I begged, tears coming to eyes. No! No! I won’t cry now!
Mike just stared at me, glaring. I shook, I was that mad. All my pent up rage and anger and violence was spilling out over the seams. I wasn’t going to let him get to me so easily.
“Stop being so dramatic and just let me through!” He growled softly. A shocked expression fell over my lips. It quickly contorted into a quiet fury.
“You really want to know why I’ve been so sad and angry lately, Mike? You really want to know why I won’t talk?” I asked him quietly, contained. His face fell in surprise. Jaime hid behind Vic.
“Yeah, I kinda do.” He nodded. Tears were falling down my face but I was too numb to feel it. Every emotion was just falling away, breaking me down piece by piece.
“You said you were babying me when I was quiet and sad for the past week. Yeah, you had a point there but I’m sorry that I can’t help it. I’m sorry that I was stolen off my street by a band I thought were different than reality. I’m sorry that I was whipped day in and day out. I’m sorry that I bled so much I could barely walk because I would faint when I did.” I whispered. Jaime and Vic made a mad dash behind me to the bunks. I took a step forward, making Mike backup. His face fell. I watched it through blurry vision.
He stayed silent. I felt the other three boys watch us in silence from their bunks.
“I’m just so sorry that when I wasn’t being whipped or beaten into submission, I had been raped. I’m sorry that I had to feel myself being violated because I got out of a bunk one night when I wasn’t supposed to. I’m just so sorry that it’s all my fault that I was left scarred and scared after every night. I’m so sorry that I’m not the same person I was back in September when I was sitting on my driveway, staring at the stars. It’s really truly all my fault that I’ve been broken and I can’t see any way past this. I’ve been on the run from those that have beaten me. I’m so sorry that this is all my fault. I’m so sorry that I can’t talk because if I do, I’ll start bursting out in tears like I am now.” I sobbed to him. I was loud and I was angry. I took a few more steps forward, backing him up even more. He reached out to touch my shoulder. I glared at him. His hand dropped.
“Rory, if-“
“No, Mike. That’s not even the half of it. I was raped and beaten and whipped and punished without remorse!” I yelled at him. The tears dripped to the floor. Mike’s face was staring down at the floor.
“Please, just listen!” He begged. Before I realized what I was doing, I punched his chest. He fell silent and let me sob and yell at him.
“I’m sorry that I’m so silent! I’m sorry that I didn’t want to break!” I screamed at him as I landed blow after blow on his chest. He did nothing to protect himself.
“I’m sorry that I did break! I’m sorry that my sister was taken from me? DO YOU KNOW WHAT IT’S LIKE TO FIND OUT YOUR SISTER WAS TAKEN BY YOUR OLD CAPTORS?” I sobbed loudly, pounding his chest, falling against it, pushing him away, repeating the process.
“WHAT IF YOU WENT THROUGH ALL THAT, AND NOW VIC WAS TAKEN AWAY FROM YOU?! WHAT IF YOU FOUND OUT THAT YOUR SIBLING WAS STOLEN AND GOING THROUGH THE SAME EXACT TORTURE YOU WENT THROUGH? WHAT IF YOU WERE TOLD YOU COULDN’T DO ANYTHING TO HELP HER? WHAT ABOUT THAT, MIKE? I’M SORRY I CAN’T TALK. I’M SORRY I’M AFRAID FOR HER. I’M SORRY THAT I’M AFRAID SHE’LL BE WHIPPED TO DEATH AND I COULDN’T HELP HER. I’M SORRY THAT I CAN’T DO ANYTHING!” I finished sobbing. Mike caught my wrists as I fell against him. The fight had gone out of my. My anger was done. I was empty, so hollow.
Mike held me tightly against his chest. I clutched his shirt with shaking fists. One hand pressed me against his warm chest and the other held the back of my head tightly. He wasn’t mad that my tears were staining his shirt, that I was shaking in his arms. He just held me there and let me be sad. He never said a word, just stood there, leaning against the kitchen counter with me in his arms. My brain was fuzz. I couldn’t think. I was worn out.
I don’t know how long it was, but eventually I stopped sobbing. I just stood there with my eyes squeezed shut and shivering against invisible claws down my back.
“I’m so sorry.”
“It’s okay.”
“I didn’t know. I wish I had known.”
“It’s okay.” I mumbled against his grey shirt. His face nuzzled down against my cheek, his breath tickling my neck. There were soft shuffling sounds behind me. A hand rubbed up and down my back gently.
“Aw, Rory.” Tony’s voice whispered to me. I turned around, Mike hesitantly letting me go. Tony took his turn and embraced me gently. I reached up and kissed his cheek lightly.
“Thanks Turtle.” I whispered. He retreated to the back. Mike wrapped me up in another hug. I placed my head on his chest, right over his beating heart. The soft thuds made me close my eyes. I was weary from the recent outrage. I just needed to go to sleep. The man kissed the top of my head gingerly.
“You need some sleep.”
“Yeah.” I whispered back. His lips brushed over my jawline and I shivered again. I was exhausted. He gently pulled me over to the couch where we lay down together. He spooned me with his arms around my waist, a blanket pulled over us. He gently moved my hair over my shoulder. I didn’t mind. I could feel his lips pressed against the back of my head, leaving a trail of gentle kisses down to my collarbone. He stroked my side lovingly.
“Just go to sleep, Rory. I’ll keep you safe.” He whispered. I smiled slowly at his words before passing out cold.
Mike and I hadn’t talked since Friday.
We hadn’t spoken a word. I had tried to talk to him, to apologize, but he had simply brushed me off, made an excuse to leave the room. “I’m going to bed early. ‘Night.” “I’m hungry.” All the excuses got him away from me. Vic tried to help me out by keeping Mike in one place, but the younger Fuentes brother always managed to disappear for a while.
My world was still just shades of black. I was just sadder and angrier by the day. I couldn’t get through to Mike. I don’t know the fate of Virgo. I couldn’t do anything to fix the situation.
Tony and I were chilling on the couch. He had tried to step up and be friendlier since Mike had basically jumped ship. He played with my hair. Jaime was trying to teach him to do a braid.
“No, no, Turtle. It goes OVER and then switch hands.” Jaime pointed out. I just chuckled quietly and smiled. Since Mike had pointed out that I wouldn’t let any of the others help me in any way, I tried to be at least a little more talkative. Friday night was a wakeup call. I needed to shape up or ship out.
“Like this?” Tony asked.
“Tony, you’re so gentle.” I chuckled quietly. He smiled and patted the top of my hair as soon as he finished the braid.
“Thank you, Rory. I don’t want to hurt you.” He giggled. Jaime flicked his nose, making him whine. Vic looked up at the two from across the front of the bus. The singer smiled happily.
Mike was still nowhere to be seen.
Tony mumbled in displeasure and runs his hands through my hair, gently taking the braid out. He stops for a moment, staring at my hair. I turn to face him. He pulls this goofy grin onto his face.
“Your hair looks better down.” He grins. I poke his shoulder and blush.
“Thanks, Turtle.” I smile wider. It was a true smile this time. A sound make me turn towards it. The back lounge has opened and closed again. Jaime yawns and walks over to Vic, sitting next to him with his head on the singer’s shoulder. Tony goes over to his bunk and hops in. I guess I should be going to bed soon as well. Everyone is pretty tired.
I get up, going towards the bunk. I see Mike shoving his phone into his pocket. I silently prepare myself for the storm that’s coming. He’s still pissed off at me. I just want to talk to him, but if he pushes me off one more time, I swear I’m going to punch him in the face.
I pass him by. He roughly bumps my shoulder. I whirl around, frowning.
“Hey, can I talk to you?” I whispered timidly, like I was a small child testing the temperature of a pool water by dipping her toe in first.
“I’m going to bed.” He excused himself before going towards the fridge. My face pulled into a frown. I wasn’t going to let him go so easily this time.
“Um, no you’re not.” I started, firmly planting my feet. He looked up from the fridge, a surprised expression on his face. I hadn’t fought back until now. He came forwards, looming over me. I stood my ground and tried not to look terrified. Jaime and Vic watched from the corner in muteness.
“Yes, I am. Now move…please.” He strained his voice. I didn’t say a word.
“Okay, I understand that you’re mad at me and you have a good reason why, but I’m trying to apologize and make this better-“
“You weren’t talking before and NOW you’re trying be friendlier?” He asked. His voice seemed to drop so low, I strained to hear it. My fists clenched together, as if I was about to swing at him. I restrained from doing so.
“Mike please just listen to me.” I begged, tears coming to eyes. No! No! I won’t cry now!
Mike just stared at me, glaring. I shook, I was that mad. All my pent up rage and anger and violence was spilling out over the seams. I wasn’t going to let him get to me so easily.
“Stop being so dramatic and just let me through!” He growled softly. A shocked expression fell over my lips. It quickly contorted into a quiet fury.
“You really want to know why I’ve been so sad and angry lately, Mike? You really want to know why I won’t talk?” I asked him quietly, contained. His face fell in surprise. Jaime hid behind Vic.
“Yeah, I kinda do.” He nodded. Tears were falling down my face but I was too numb to feel it. Every emotion was just falling away, breaking me down piece by piece.
“You said you were babying me when I was quiet and sad for the past week. Yeah, you had a point there but I’m sorry that I can’t help it. I’m sorry that I was stolen off my street by a band I thought were different than reality. I’m sorry that I was whipped day in and day out. I’m sorry that I bled so much I could barely walk because I would faint when I did.” I whispered. Jaime and Vic made a mad dash behind me to the bunks. I took a step forward, making Mike backup. His face fell. I watched it through blurry vision.
He stayed silent. I felt the other three boys watch us in silence from their bunks.
“I’m just so sorry that when I wasn’t being whipped or beaten into submission, I had been raped. I’m sorry that I had to feel myself being violated because I got out of a bunk one night when I wasn’t supposed to. I’m just so sorry that it’s all my fault that I was left scarred and scared after every night. I’m so sorry that I’m not the same person I was back in September when I was sitting on my driveway, staring at the stars. It’s really truly all my fault that I’ve been broken and I can’t see any way past this. I’ve been on the run from those that have beaten me. I’m so sorry that this is all my fault. I’m so sorry that I can’t talk because if I do, I’ll start bursting out in tears like I am now.” I sobbed to him. I was loud and I was angry. I took a few more steps forward, backing him up even more. He reached out to touch my shoulder. I glared at him. His hand dropped.
“Rory, if-“
“No, Mike. That’s not even the half of it. I was raped and beaten and whipped and punished without remorse!” I yelled at him. The tears dripped to the floor. Mike’s face was staring down at the floor.
“Please, just listen!” He begged. Before I realized what I was doing, I punched his chest. He fell silent and let me sob and yell at him.
“I’m sorry that I’m so silent! I’m sorry that I didn’t want to break!” I screamed at him as I landed blow after blow on his chest. He did nothing to protect himself.
“I’m sorry that I did break! I’m sorry that my sister was taken from me? DO YOU KNOW WHAT IT’S LIKE TO FIND OUT YOUR SISTER WAS TAKEN BY YOUR OLD CAPTORS?” I sobbed loudly, pounding his chest, falling against it, pushing him away, repeating the process.
“WHAT IF YOU WENT THROUGH ALL THAT, AND NOW VIC WAS TAKEN AWAY FROM YOU?! WHAT IF YOU FOUND OUT THAT YOUR SIBLING WAS STOLEN AND GOING THROUGH THE SAME EXACT TORTURE YOU WENT THROUGH? WHAT IF YOU WERE TOLD YOU COULDN’T DO ANYTHING TO HELP HER? WHAT ABOUT THAT, MIKE? I’M SORRY I CAN’T TALK. I’M SORRY I’M AFRAID FOR HER. I’M SORRY THAT I’M AFRAID SHE’LL BE WHIPPED TO DEATH AND I COULDN’T HELP HER. I’M SORRY THAT I CAN’T DO ANYTHING!” I finished sobbing. Mike caught my wrists as I fell against him. The fight had gone out of my. My anger was done. I was empty, so hollow.
Mike held me tightly against his chest. I clutched his shirt with shaking fists. One hand pressed me against his warm chest and the other held the back of my head tightly. He wasn’t mad that my tears were staining his shirt, that I was shaking in his arms. He just held me there and let me be sad. He never said a word, just stood there, leaning against the kitchen counter with me in his arms. My brain was fuzz. I couldn’t think. I was worn out.
I don’t know how long it was, but eventually I stopped sobbing. I just stood there with my eyes squeezed shut and shivering against invisible claws down my back.
“I’m so sorry.”
“It’s okay.”
“I didn’t know. I wish I had known.”
“It’s okay.” I mumbled against his grey shirt. His face nuzzled down against my cheek, his breath tickling my neck. There were soft shuffling sounds behind me. A hand rubbed up and down my back gently.
“Aw, Rory.” Tony’s voice whispered to me. I turned around, Mike hesitantly letting me go. Tony took his turn and embraced me gently. I reached up and kissed his cheek lightly.
“Thanks Turtle.” I whispered. He retreated to the back. Mike wrapped me up in another hug. I placed my head on his chest, right over his beating heart. The soft thuds made me close my eyes. I was weary from the recent outrage. I just needed to go to sleep. The man kissed the top of my head gingerly.
“You need some sleep.”
“Yeah.” I whispered back. His lips brushed over my jawline and I shivered again. I was exhausted. He gently pulled me over to the couch where we lay down together. He spooned me with his arms around my waist, a blanket pulled over us. He gently moved my hair over my shoulder. I didn’t mind. I could feel his lips pressed against the back of my head, leaving a trail of gentle kisses down to my collarbone. He stroked my side lovingly.
“Just go to sleep, Rory. I’ll keep you safe.” He whispered. I smiled slowly at his words before passing out cold.
Notes
Hahaha so I ended the suspense!
You guys all figure out that Mike and Rory fight (Rory screaming most of the time but oh well, that's how it goes!), but then it all gets resolved. Rory realizes that she wasn't handling this the right way. Mike realizes the same thing. All is well in the world.
Or is it?
OKAY BIG NOTE RIGHT HERE PAY ATTENTION TO THE CAPS LOCK!!!!
So I'm thinking about having a little contest of sorts. Some of you might be wondering, "Hey, why aren't you writing anything in Virgo's POV or anything about MIW trying to free Virgo?" Well, I will answer you this! I might (MIGHT!) be holding a little one shot contest where all participants write a little one shot, submit it, I chose best one and then that person writes about what happened to Virgo this entire time. I know that this story has suffered some copying issues and challenges, but I want to see if I can open this up to the readers once again. I would release more details if I have a lot of people in favor of the contest.
Would you guys want me to do this? If you guys want this to happen, just comment on the story letting me know! If you don't want a contest, then I'll probably just write one or two chapters on what's happening to Virgo, but not too much on it.
Good luck and don't forget to comment!
Hahaha thank you! Sorry I was watching Jane Eyre with my mommy
5/10/15