Rage, Rage Against the Dying of the Light
Of a Most Stormy Life—Was Drawn
Tuesday morning, 8:33 A.M….
I woke up snuggled under the blankets. Looks as if I had passed out in Ricky’s bunk. His arm was slung over my chest. I wiggled as it pressed against a bad bruise. The blackened flesh tingled and sent out shots of razor like pain.
Ricky’s arms tightened around me and he pulled my body closer to his. I gasped from the agony and he looked down at me, propped up on one elbow.
“What is it?” He asked worriedly. I pushed his arm before I could go numb with the torture. He took the sign and let me calm down.
“Bruises, sir.” I managed out. He stroked my arm as I turned back to face him.
“Oh.” He responded simply. I closed my eyes and let myself fall back onto his pillow. I was enveloped in comforting warmth. It reminded me a little bit of my own home. I loved it.
“Rory!” Someone called. Ricky looked up. I glanced at him nervously.
The five guys had bought me, but who was I supposed to serve? Ricky wanted me most, but the others…? I wanted to be with Ricky. He seemed to treat me well. To the others, I was still just a thing. To Ricky, I had feelings. I wanted to be near him.
Why did I want to be near my buyer that I had sworn to hate?
Because he still made me feel human.
“It’s Chris, Little One. You can go.” He murmured. His lips placed a kiss on my temple. He released me as I swung my legs over the corner of the bunk and hopped out. Landing on the floor with a thud, I winced from the pain and then went back to the front lounge.
“Coming, sir.” I spoke. Wobbling into the front lounge, I saw that Chris was relaxing on a couch. Vinny was driving. It was early in the morning. Vinny always takes early morning drives, or that’s what I had heard.
“Sit down.” He commanded. I started to sit down next to him, but then he pulled me onto his lap. I let out a little mewl of protest, as if I was a little kitten that was being held by its mother.
He wrapped his arms around my waist as I unwillingly leaned back against his chest. Oh, how desperate I was to call out to Ricky! No, I feared the punishment. I would just wait until he came out of his bunk and then I would pleaded with my big blue eyes.
I’d like to think it was a talent of mine, begging with my eyes.
“How did you sleep, Little One?” He asked me. I shivered under the tickle of his breath. For some reason, the pet name didn’t seem as beautiful and soft as when Ricky said it…
“Good, good sir.” I mumbled. A sharp smack resonated on my arm.
“Louder.”
“Good, sir.” I repeated a little louder. He kissed the back of my neck, as if it was a way to say that I had done well.
“That was better.” He murmured. I exhaled a small sigh of relief.
“Well, someone’s looking happy.” Balz came out of his bunk. He had a paperback book in his hand. I was staring at the floor until his hand caressed under my chin, making me look up. I had no answer. Was he talking to me or not?
He stroked my cheek and turned to Chris.
“How’d she do last night?” He asked. Chris just shrugged. I held my breath, waiting out whatever he’d say.
“Who do you think she was with?” Chris chuckled. Balz rolled his piercing his eyes and I sighed a little.
“Oh, Ricky.” Balz rolled his eyes with a faint hint of a smirk on his lips. I nearly smiled at the thought. He continued to stroke my cheek absent mindedly as he kept up the conversation with Chris.
“I saw another amber alert for her.” Balz told Chris. The singer adjusted my position on his leg for a moment before answering.
“Vinny!” Motionless called after a minute.
“What’s up?” The driver looked back. We slowed down on the highway for a moment.
“Head off to Montana.” Chris commanded. Vinny agreed and then made a turn off an exit ramp. We were starting to get away from all the traffic now. No traffic means no witnesses. No witnesses means no way of escape…
Balz intertwined another strand of my blonde hair around his finger as he thought. I read the title on his book. It was a large collection of crossword puzzles. I saw a pencil neatly tucked on his last page. I didn’t know that Balz liked crossword puzzles…
“Look, we can get away, but they could still recognize her.” Balz suggested. I bit my lip. What did they mean?
“Well, what should we do?” Chris asked. Ryan emerged from the bunk this time. I grew more and more anxious as more of the men appeared. I hated this tight knot in my gut. It always warned me I might be getting an anxiety attack or a panic attack.
“Visit Ronnie, how about.” Ryan suggested as he went to the coffee machine. I saw him start to brew the coffee beans as I tilted my head up in curiosity.
“Dye her hair….I like that. Contacts, maybe? Cut off her hair, possibly. What about tattoos?” Chris chuckled. I started shaking at that. I absolutely hated needles. The thought of a dozen of them stabbing my skin all at once was just bad.
“No.” Ricky came out at the mention of that. I looked to him gratefully.
“Well, do you have a better idea?” Chris shrugged that off. Ricky smiled a little and I knew it was for me.
“Piercings?” Ryan suggested. My eyes went wide at that.
“Can I have her?” Ricky asked Chris quickly. He bobbed his head and pushed me off of him. I stumbled a minute until Ricky caught me and let me sit down next to him. His arm wrapped around my shoulders.
“Just give her a new outfit.” Ricky shrugged. I snuggled into his shoulder, silently thanking him for not suggesting anything that involved stabbing my skin with needles.
“That’s true. All she wears is that ratty black shirt and shorts.” Ryan eyes me. I looked down to the floor. Well I’m sorry if that’s all I had to wear…It’s not like I had my own closet back…
“Fine. We’ll dye her hair, give her contacts, and then get her some clothes from the merch people.” Chris agreed. Ricky patted my shoulder affectionately. Thank goodness at least someone was kind enough to let me have my own new outfit.
“What color should we dye her hair?”
“Purple!”
“Blue!”
“Black!” Everyone suggested an assortment of colors. Honestly, as long as they didn’t cut my hair, I didn’t mind any color. I just liked having my long hair so I could throw it up in a ponytail or braid.
“What color do you want, Little One?” Ricky asked me quietly. In the corner, Vinny and Ghost were arguing whether I would look better in purple or bleach white.
I gulped at the question. I didn’t want to choose something that he wouldn’t like or something that would get me in trouble.
“How about black and silver, sir?” I asked him. He beamed at me as he reached over and held my free hand. His thumb rubbed circles on the back of my hand. I smiled into his shoulder.
“That sound beautiful. Do you even want to wear contacts?” He asked me. I shrugged. No, not really….
“I wear contacts or glass….” I started off. He squeezed my hand.
“Don’t worry, Little One. We’ll figure something out.” He kissed my head and went back to the conversation.
“How about black and silver?” He added. Everyone looked over to him, then to me, then to him again.
“That sounds fine.” Ryan shrugged. Ghost looked at me for a minute and then nodded, as if it met their approval.
“Okay, but we’re doing green contacts.” Balz stated firmly. I went back to staring at the floor as they all murmured about how I would look. I don’t know why they would worry so much about my appearance unless I was going out in public.
Was I?
I woke up snuggled under the blankets. Looks as if I had passed out in Ricky’s bunk. His arm was slung over my chest. I wiggled as it pressed against a bad bruise. The blackened flesh tingled and sent out shots of razor like pain.
Ricky’s arms tightened around me and he pulled my body closer to his. I gasped from the agony and he looked down at me, propped up on one elbow.
“What is it?” He asked worriedly. I pushed his arm before I could go numb with the torture. He took the sign and let me calm down.
“Bruises, sir.” I managed out. He stroked my arm as I turned back to face him.
“Oh.” He responded simply. I closed my eyes and let myself fall back onto his pillow. I was enveloped in comforting warmth. It reminded me a little bit of my own home. I loved it.
“Rory!” Someone called. Ricky looked up. I glanced at him nervously.
The five guys had bought me, but who was I supposed to serve? Ricky wanted me most, but the others…? I wanted to be with Ricky. He seemed to treat me well. To the others, I was still just a thing. To Ricky, I had feelings. I wanted to be near him.
Why did I want to be near my buyer that I had sworn to hate?
Because he still made me feel human.
“It’s Chris, Little One. You can go.” He murmured. His lips placed a kiss on my temple. He released me as I swung my legs over the corner of the bunk and hopped out. Landing on the floor with a thud, I winced from the pain and then went back to the front lounge.
“Coming, sir.” I spoke. Wobbling into the front lounge, I saw that Chris was relaxing on a couch. Vinny was driving. It was early in the morning. Vinny always takes early morning drives, or that’s what I had heard.
“Sit down.” He commanded. I started to sit down next to him, but then he pulled me onto his lap. I let out a little mewl of protest, as if I was a little kitten that was being held by its mother.
He wrapped his arms around my waist as I unwillingly leaned back against his chest. Oh, how desperate I was to call out to Ricky! No, I feared the punishment. I would just wait until he came out of his bunk and then I would pleaded with my big blue eyes.
I’d like to think it was a talent of mine, begging with my eyes.
“How did you sleep, Little One?” He asked me. I shivered under the tickle of his breath. For some reason, the pet name didn’t seem as beautiful and soft as when Ricky said it…
“Good, good sir.” I mumbled. A sharp smack resonated on my arm.
“Louder.”
“Good, sir.” I repeated a little louder. He kissed the back of my neck, as if it was a way to say that I had done well.
“That was better.” He murmured. I exhaled a small sigh of relief.
“Well, someone’s looking happy.” Balz came out of his bunk. He had a paperback book in his hand. I was staring at the floor until his hand caressed under my chin, making me look up. I had no answer. Was he talking to me or not?
He stroked my cheek and turned to Chris.
“How’d she do last night?” He asked. Chris just shrugged. I held my breath, waiting out whatever he’d say.
“Who do you think she was with?” Chris chuckled. Balz rolled his piercing his eyes and I sighed a little.
“Oh, Ricky.” Balz rolled his eyes with a faint hint of a smirk on his lips. I nearly smiled at the thought. He continued to stroke my cheek absent mindedly as he kept up the conversation with Chris.
“I saw another amber alert for her.” Balz told Chris. The singer adjusted my position on his leg for a moment before answering.
“Vinny!” Motionless called after a minute.
“What’s up?” The driver looked back. We slowed down on the highway for a moment.
“Head off to Montana.” Chris commanded. Vinny agreed and then made a turn off an exit ramp. We were starting to get away from all the traffic now. No traffic means no witnesses. No witnesses means no way of escape…
Balz intertwined another strand of my blonde hair around his finger as he thought. I read the title on his book. It was a large collection of crossword puzzles. I saw a pencil neatly tucked on his last page. I didn’t know that Balz liked crossword puzzles…
“Look, we can get away, but they could still recognize her.” Balz suggested. I bit my lip. What did they mean?
“Well, what should we do?” Chris asked. Ryan emerged from the bunk this time. I grew more and more anxious as more of the men appeared. I hated this tight knot in my gut. It always warned me I might be getting an anxiety attack or a panic attack.
“Visit Ronnie, how about.” Ryan suggested as he went to the coffee machine. I saw him start to brew the coffee beans as I tilted my head up in curiosity.
“Dye her hair….I like that. Contacts, maybe? Cut off her hair, possibly. What about tattoos?” Chris chuckled. I started shaking at that. I absolutely hated needles. The thought of a dozen of them stabbing my skin all at once was just bad.
“No.” Ricky came out at the mention of that. I looked to him gratefully.
“Well, do you have a better idea?” Chris shrugged that off. Ricky smiled a little and I knew it was for me.
“Piercings?” Ryan suggested. My eyes went wide at that.
“Can I have her?” Ricky asked Chris quickly. He bobbed his head and pushed me off of him. I stumbled a minute until Ricky caught me and let me sit down next to him. His arm wrapped around my shoulders.
“Just give her a new outfit.” Ricky shrugged. I snuggled into his shoulder, silently thanking him for not suggesting anything that involved stabbing my skin with needles.
“That’s true. All she wears is that ratty black shirt and shorts.” Ryan eyes me. I looked down to the floor. Well I’m sorry if that’s all I had to wear…It’s not like I had my own closet back…
“Fine. We’ll dye her hair, give her contacts, and then get her some clothes from the merch people.” Chris agreed. Ricky patted my shoulder affectionately. Thank goodness at least someone was kind enough to let me have my own new outfit.
“What color should we dye her hair?”
“Purple!”
“Blue!”
“Black!” Everyone suggested an assortment of colors. Honestly, as long as they didn’t cut my hair, I didn’t mind any color. I just liked having my long hair so I could throw it up in a ponytail or braid.
“What color do you want, Little One?” Ricky asked me quietly. In the corner, Vinny and Ghost were arguing whether I would look better in purple or bleach white.
I gulped at the question. I didn’t want to choose something that he wouldn’t like or something that would get me in trouble.
“How about black and silver, sir?” I asked him. He beamed at me as he reached over and held my free hand. His thumb rubbed circles on the back of my hand. I smiled into his shoulder.
“That sound beautiful. Do you even want to wear contacts?” He asked me. I shrugged. No, not really….
“I wear contacts or glass….” I started off. He squeezed my hand.
“Don’t worry, Little One. We’ll figure something out.” He kissed my head and went back to the conversation.
“How about black and silver?” He added. Everyone looked over to him, then to me, then to him again.
“That sounds fine.” Ryan shrugged. Ghost looked at me for a minute and then nodded, as if it met their approval.
“Okay, but we’re doing green contacts.” Balz stated firmly. I went back to staring at the floor as they all murmured about how I would look. I don’t know why they would worry so much about my appearance unless I was going out in public.
Was I?
Hahaha thank you! Sorry I was watching Jane Eyre with my mommy
5/10/15