Remember Me?

I closed the door and went to the living room.
"She fell asleep." I said and sat down next to my mom, I put my head on her shoulder. "I'm tired." I said. "I couldn't sleep." "Nightmare?" I nod. "Want to tell your momma about it?"
"Ma, I'm not ten anymore."
"But you're still my baby boy, always will be okay?" I nod. "Now tell me."
"It- it was horrible.. I don't know why, but it's like Tris is fucking disappointed at me, or it's a sign that I have to take care of my daughter more."
"Tris was always disappointed at you Michael."
"Why?"
"Because you never took out the trash or you left that disgusting substance in the table, just little things."
"I know momma. I know." She kisses my temple.
"I have to say, your doing a great job." I shake my head. "Why not?"
"It's not great, it's and okay job. We had a fight last night, and I heard her and Stephan talking."
"Those two are like peanut butter and jelly, they were like that at childhood as well."
"I know momma, and it makes me so happy seeing her get along with everybody, even Alysha. But every mistake I do with her, it's like I'm pushing her away, you know?"
"Mike, let me tell you something." She sits up straighter. "When you were Alia's age, you were already in a very serious relationship with Beatrice, and I loved it, you didn't drink heavily anymore, you didn't smoke as much, you kept on getting tattoos but that's not the point." I chuckle. "When Beatrice passed away, you always left Alia with me, always. You would go to clubs, bars, strippers,and drink until you couldn't say hi and blacked out for days. You slept around with many girls, and the more I wanted to be there for you, the more I wanted to HELP you, the more you pushed me away. I made no mistakes, well maybe let you drink your first beer, but I know how it feels to be pushed away by your child. It's not easy Michael, and it's took a long time for me to finally wrap my old arms around your shoulders, the night you went to leave Alia at the orphanage, you made a mistake, but a mistake that was preventable, but you didn't prevent it, you didn't listen for the help around you, for those calls of hope." I stared at the window. "What you need to do, is whether Alia pushes you away or not, to always be there for her. She'll come back eventually. They always do. These small fights that you and her have were something so common at 15 with you and Vic. Oh you two were horrible, but the more she pushes you away, the more empty she'll feel here." She points to my chest. "And that's when she make a decision, to forever feel that emptiness or come back to you. It's going to be her choice either way."
"Momma, what would I do without you?" I kiss her cheek and wrap my arms around her.
"Probably never talk to Alia, again. Or probably be buried next to Tris." She's right about that.
"What date is today?" I asked, I felt like today was something special, I just couldn't wrap my finger around it.
"December 5... Why?" OF COURSE! I got up on my feet and kissed my mother in the cheek.
"Mike, what's so important?"
"I need to go to the cemetery."
"Why?"
"Momma, twenty years ago, I married the woman of my dreams." I got my keys and headed to the cemetery.
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I looked for her gravestone, and stopped when I did. Beatrice Fuentes. A loving wife, best friend, sister, aunt and mother. I kneeled down next to her grave.
"Hey tris." I cleaned out the leaf covered stone. "It's another year, another anniversary that you aren't here, it hurts still." I clean out the dead flowers and put the new bouquet. "I bought your favorites, I hope you like them. I miss you Tris, I really do. There isn't one night that I don't think of you. So, Alia's back, and she looks so much like you. It's like you're alive again. She's so beautiful. She's going out with a man, so keep an eye on them." I chuckle.
"I always need your help with our daughter, Tris. I know she's trying her hardest not to hate me, I can tell in our arguments. I made a mistake, and it haunts me every night. I know there's going to be a day where Alia simply will not want to see me, or any of my family. I haven't talked to your side in a long time, and I don't know where everyone is. I know your mother still hates me for not giving Alia to them, I know that's a fact. Your little sister is probably in college already. I mean after nineteen years, she's the same age as Alia. I don't know what to do, I can't correct her without her bringing up the orphanage. I just want our relationship to be normal.. But that's to much to ask for." It started to rain. I sigh and put my hood on
. "I guess I'll come back soon. Miss you Tris." I trace the name in the stone and slowly make my way out of the cemetery.

Notes