Remember Me?

I sat on my bed, knees to my chin, in my pajamas, looking out the window. It's been like this for the whole night. I was just staring at the stars, and let my arms go numb. I wipe away the tears that had escaped.
"Alia?"
"What do you want?"
"It's Stephan." I put on a hoodie I had close by. "Can I come in?"
"Go for it." He opens the door and closes it slightly. He was in some plaid pajamas bottoms, no shirt. Exposing his chest tattoo. He walks to my bed and sits next to me.
"You okay?" I shake my head, and he sighs. "Fights with Mike?" I nod, he sighs again. "Can't sleep?" I nod once more. "Hey, you can talk to me. You know that."
"I know." I said softly. I put my head on his shoulders. "Sometimes I ask myself if theres a life out there with no pain, guilt and sadness. Cause I'll love to be there."
"There probably is. I think everybody asks themselves sometimes."
"But that's sometimes, I want to be out there Stephy, somewhere were I can be happy with my family and let nothing ruin it. You get me?" He nods. "I hate life."
"Maybe right now, Alia. Life gets better."
"When you have a job, a career, a bright future, loving parents, supporting family and no haunting past. Yeah, I won't have a better future. Maybe I was built for sadness. Maybe it's a punishment for something I did when I was a little girl, maybe a punishment for that one time the lady at the orphanage caught me mixing the paint." Stephan chuckles.
"I don't think so Ali. It's a test.. And it brings lots of obstacles. You just have to pass them."
"You sound like a priest." He shrugs.
"It's the way I was raised , Alia. "
"Raised.. You lucky bastard" I punch his arm and he winces. "How is it to have both parents?"
"It.. It could be complicated sometimes, both of them have different views and opinions... But it's amazing." "Lucky." I said softly.
"I wish I had my mom with me, maybe is she was alive my dad wouldn't have left me in that place I called home for years. Maybe I would have had a younger sibling, I don't know. Maybe Alysha wouldn't be in the picture, I don't hate her, but I still feel like my dad puts her first than me."
"Tell him that. Communication is what you need with Mike, Alia." He kisses my arms, making me wince. "I was afraid so.." "How you know?"
"You left bloody tissues on the bathroom trash can. You're the only one here that does that Alia." I look at the wall. "I'm here for you. If you don't want to tell Bryan, your dad, the girls just come to me okay? I'll help you. I know how it feels to feel like everything's your fault okay? I don't want to see you hurt anymore."
"I'll try Stephan, and thanks. I agree with Penny." He chuckles. "You're really a sweetheart." I wrap my arms around his torso."I love you cousin."
"Me too cuz. Me too."

Notes