I press Alex's contact on my phone. He picks up after a few rings.

"Uhm- Gi-Gi, is that you?" He asks carefully.

"Yeah, Hi Alex, how are you?" I try to steady my voice to not sound shaky but I don't really know what to tell him.

"Look, Gi, I'm on the airport right now, uhm, it's not a good moment." He replies coldly.

"Uh, Oh, okay, don't worry, it was nothing important, sorry for bothering you, bye." I quickly end the call before he hears my sob.

I am lying on the couch curled into a ball and cry into my pillow, sobs rack my body and I feel like I want to die. Can you die of fear? I don't know but it sure feels like it.

It is only after a couple of minutes of ringtone that I realise there is an incoming skype call on my laptop.
I crawl over to the coffee table to press the green button but the call ends before I reach the keyboard only to start again after a couple of seconds.
It's Alex. When I take the call I see him on the screen with his face in his hands. Then he looks up with a sigh and his brows are raised as he asks. "Gi-Gi, what's wrong?"

I wipe my face and try to sort out my hair while I notice Alex's eyes get wide with shock. "Fuck, Gi, what's going on, what happened? You look horrible?" He comes closer to the screen, he is sitting in what looks like an airport lounge and there is a lot of buzz in the background.
The fact that I see a familiar face in front of me doesn't help but pushes me over the edge and I totally loose it. I start to cry and try to tell Alex what's going on over my sobbing and sniffing.

"Alex, I'm sorry, but it didn't know who to call. I'm all alone, Tony is on tour and I am always so afraid, I had these pills for a couple of days to sleep but now I have nothing and I just can't, I can't tell Tony but I have to tell somebody, I have those nightmares and I'm terri -fied when I'm awake. I just do- nt know wha-t to d-o anymore." I stop and wipe the tears from my eyes again still sobbing.

I hear a sigh and look back up to the screen. "Listen Gi-Gi. I know what that feels like, okay I had to deal with anxiety myself. You will overcome it at one point. But for now I'm here and I won't go anywhere. I'm on a layover to fly to LA so I will come see you when I'm there tomorrow." I nod to that, my tears still streaming down my cheeks.

He shoots me a little smile but I can see he is stressed and I feel bad immediately. "Hey cheer up, Baby. Lie down and we can talk until you fall asleep." His voice is soothing and I take the laptop and go back onto the couch placing it beside me.
I let my head fall onto the pillow and watch Alex taking a sip of his drink and relax back into his chair.

"Thank you, Alex you are a good friend." I whisper. He forces another smile nodding in acknowledgment.

"Okay, now, I'm gonna tell you a bedtime story while you close your eyes and try to sleep, when you get anxious you can always open your eyes a bit and see me here. Right?" I nod to this and close my eyes and just listen to his sweet voice.

Of course it's not a classical bedtime story but some weird and stupid but funny story about something that happened to Vinnie Vegas, after a while I don't even follow the story but just listen to his voice that talks me to sleep.

....

When I awake it is morning and my laptop has run out of power and shut down but I survived another night and that makes me happy.

I take out my phone and text Alex. 'Thank you for saving me. I owe you big time. Love you. Gi.'

I get ready and take Mayhem for a walk and then go grocery shopping for once because I want to prepare a real meal for when Alex arrives.

I clean up the house a bit because I have not only neglected my personal hygiene but also never cleaned up while I was drugged and drunk every day.

Then Tony calls and I pick up immediately as I have been awaiting his call. "Hey Tony, I love you and how are you?." And for once I sound genuinely happy.
I hear him chuckle a bit. "Hey Babe, so good to hear you. I'm good how bout you and I love you too?"

"I'm definitely better now that I hear you. I miss you so much, Turtle. I'm lonely all the time but today Alex will drop by." I tell him because I don't want to lie more than I have to. Of course I considered not telling Tony because I knew he would not be happy about it but I decided against it.

There is a moment of silence on the other end and I can feel the tension building up. Then he speaks again and his voice has changed. It sounds a lot darker than before.
"Why is Alex coming?"

I sigh and try to answer as truthfully as possible. "Because I called him yesterday and found out he is in LA today and because he is still my friend."

I hear him huff on the other end but he doesn't say anything else so I try to talk some sense into him. "Tony, there is no reason to be jealous, I love you and I only want to be with you, okay?"

"Okay Gi, but it is so hard when I am away and I trust you but I don't trust him..." Here he breaks up and sighs exasperated.

"Tony let's talk about something else, I don't want to fight with you and I don't want you to be mad at me, that's why I told you, there is nothing to worry about."

We talk for a while and I try to ease his mood but I can feel he is still not completely over it by the time we end the call.

An hour later it is dark already and I am again pacing my living room agitated with fright when there is a knock on the door.

I rush to open it and am so relieved when I see Alex standing there that I throw my arms around his neck pulling myself in for a well needed hug. "Alex, oh my God, I'm so glad you're here."

He grins at me and awkwardly pats my back. "Hey, hey Gi. It's all good. I'm here now." I release him and pull him inside grabbing his hand.

"Come in, I have actually made dinner for us. Sit down in the kitchen. Oh this is Mayhem, oh no, you have seen him yesterday on Skype, didn't you." I babble on because for one I am excited but I also want to get rid of the awkwardness between us.

Alex just smiles at me and sits down at the kitchen table where I have set the plates for the two of us and I pour us some wine.

We both relax a lot over dinner and drinks and by the end of it we are back to our old teasing and joking which is nice. It gets late and Alex announces it is time for him to go back to his hotel.

"Oh Alex, please can you stay here with me? We have a guest room and I am staying on the couch anyways, please?" I probably sound desperate and that is because I am.

He looks at me and sighs defeated. "Okay, but I have a meeting early tomorrow morning, so I need to go to bed soon."

"That is not a problem, let me show you your room and thank you Alex, it means a lot." I let out a shaky breath.

Notes

So Alex is back in the picture! What do you think?