"I don't do band members!"

Jack had convinced me that I should try the duet with Alex, stating it would 'improve' our relationship. We had rehearsed it once and actually Alex had been nice for a change.

We had to rearrange the song a bit though as my voice of course isn't as powerful as Cass's so we ended up singing together for most of the song but even Rian had to admit our voices sounded really nice together. Alex had tried to talk to me afterwards but I had told him I wasn't interested in what he had to tell me.

Right now I was standing side stage at the ATL set waiting to sing the duet with the band and I am worried. Alex seems to be severely intoxicated, crap it, he is shitfaced. He messed up in a couple of songs and I don't know what to do.

Jack shoots me glances and I can see he is concerned as well. Gladly our song is the last and we are nearly there.
When I am on, Alex introduces me.

"Hey guys are you fucking enjoying yourself?" He shouts out to the crowd and they start cheering. "You guys are fucking amazing. Our last song is 'remembering Sunday' and as you know we normally have Casadee to sing with me.

But tonight I am glad to be able to sing with a very special person, she is one of our site managers and I wouldn't know what to do without her. Please give her a hand. Come here Princess."

He motions for me to come out on stage and when I do he throws an arm around my shoulders and I can feel him leaning into me to steady himself. I exchange worried glances with Jack but smile and wave to the fans nonetheless.

"I would rather be in bed with you than here on stage, Babe." He tells me and the crowd. "But I know you wouldn't want me." he adds whisper-slurring in my ear as he pulls me even tighter to his side.

I raise an eyebrow at him and say nothing but nudge him to start the song. He lifts his guitar and starts strumming the first chords.

He woke up from dreaming and put on his shoes
Started making his way past 2 in the morning
He hasn't been sober for days

Through the whole song he keeps his eyes on me, he acts as if there is no one else out there and I can see tears running down his cheek as we reach the chorus.

Forgive me, I'm trying to find
My calling, I'm calling at night
I don't mean to be a bother,
But have you seen this girl?
She's been running through my dreams
And it's driving me crazy, it seems
I'm going to ask her to marry me

I am shocked but I don't want to spoil the performance so I grab his face as if it is part of the show and wipe the tears away with my thumb so that nobody would notice.

Even though she doesn't believe in love,
He's determined to call her bluff
Who could deny these butterflies?
They're filling his gut

When we finish he hugs me tight and kisses my neck, then I wave to the crowd and head towards the backstage to get rid of my mic when I hear the fans scream in shock, I turn around to see Alex who was standing on the edge of the stage loosing balance and falling into the barricades.

"Alex!" I yell while running towards the pit and jump down as Jack on the other side of the stage mirrors my movement. I push away the security guys as they bend over the body that lies on the ground motionless and Jack is beside me screaming in shock. "Oh my fucking god, no, Gi, what's wrong, shit, what are we gonna do?"

I get up. And I am totally on auto-pilot, I don't feel anything I just function. So I get my phone out while telling everybody to not touch him. We have been playing scenarios like that in our heads for million times while preparing this event so I know exactly what to do.

I call 911 tell them what happened then I call security at the gates ordering them to clear a corridor for the ambulance. Then I get back on stage where Rian and Zack stand frozen to the spot in horror and I pick up the microphone to calm down the fans.

"Guys, I need your help right now, as you might have seen, Alex is hurt and unconscious, the paramedics are on their way, in order to get him out of here as quickly as possible we need to get the barricades out of the way, please stay clear, and make a gateway for the ambulance" with that I motion with my hands, similar to the bands when they want to split the crowd to open up a mosh pit. Reluctantly the fans start to move in the given direction.

"NO, guys, this has to be faster. MOVE!" I yell. Now the crowd picks up speed and they make a broad corridor, i can hear the sound of sirens in the distance, they must be already at the gates so I motion for the security guys who still guard the limp body of Alex on the floor to remove part of the barricades.

When the paramedics arrive and attend to Alex, hooking him up on an IV, strapping him onto the stretcher and lifting him up into the back of the ambulance I don't move at all but just stare at the scene in front of me.

I am starting to come undone. I don't recall anyone asking anything, nor me answering any questions, nor interacting with anyone.
I only return to a conscious state when someone who I recognise as Jack after a couple of minutes shakes me by my shoulders calling my name. "Gi, Gi, we have to follow the ambulance in a car."
"We can take Max's. I have the car keys here." I answer absentmindedly pulling the keys out of my pocket.

" I am driving" Rian steps in, snatching the keys out of my hand. "Jack you sit with Gi in the back. Look after her. Zack you sit in front with me. Let's go." We run to the car and Rian is making an effort to not loose the ambulance in front of us out of sight, he drives like the devil and we reach the hospital only minutes after Alex.

During the car ride I begin to silently cry into Jacks shoulder who is holding me tight, I can only repeat one sentence over and over again. "It's all my fault, I'm so sorry." Until Jacks gets angry with me.

"Gi, will you stop, it is not your fault. You did not do anything wrong. Stop blaming yourself." He snaps at me instantly regretting it. He rubs my arms up and down to comfort me. "I'm sorry. Please Gi, stop crying." He whispers softly in my ear.

Notes

Nooooo, Alex!