For What It's Worth..

“It’s been awhile, Virginia.”

“Maire?” I asked quietly, confusion clear in my voice. “What are you, I thought you were at the hospital?” I looked at Dylan with anger and confusion as to why he brought his mother here.

“You brought your mother into this?” I seethed. He quickly shook his head, while Maire spoke up again. “No, sweetie, I just wanted too see you, and after I was told of what him and his ‘girlfriend’.” She put her fingers up in quotation marks. I saw him about to say something, but she silenced him by putting a finger up. “Did too you, he owes me alot. I taught him to treat women better than that.” I saw sadness and a fierceness that only a single mother could have for her child.

She had to raise him on her own, with men coming into her life, and leaving with bruises the size of my head when she realized they were scum, and all they wanted was someone to take their rage out on. She put them in their place.

“Sorry to be blunt, but he seems to think he can do anything he wants without consequences. He’s dead wrong, and as far as I know, he should be in jail still.” Her face didn’t betray what she was thinking, and I wished that I could afford the same luxury, but my face always betrays what I’m feeling.

And right now, I was pissed and hurt, and a tiny bit scared.




“How have you been?” I asked Maire, as I leaned back against the shitty little Nissan. I kept one eye trained on the guys, Dylan included, so if they tried anything I would stop it.. again. Of course, earlier Dylan couldn’t keep his big mouth shut, and pissed Chris off, and Ricky. For a chill guy, Chris could get pretty mad when he wanted too. And it was times like that that threw me for a loop, when he raised his voice in anger, because I barely ever heard it; only rarely.

“You got quite the protective bunch of men there, don’t you.” And I blushed as she easily avoided my question. “Yeah, they’re pretty great. They always seem to be there whenever I need them.” I paused, laughing a little at my internal thoughts. “Or when I don’t, doesn’t seem to matter.”

She let out a short cough, that turned into a laugh.

“To answer your question, I’ve been better. Your turn, is that tall one your new boyfriend?”

“Was it that obvious?” I asked and then gave a resigned sigh. “Yes, that’s him, his name is Chris Cerulli.”
“And he’s in a band? Any good?”

“One of the best.” I smiled. I could see that we were getting around too the real reason as to why she was here, and Dylan. I just wish we could have gotten too the bottom of this before Chris and Ricky tried to beat the shit out of Dylan; not that I wouldn’t mind seeing it, just that he needs to take this mother home. And I doubt he would be able too after Chris was finished with him.

“So, you’re probably wondering why Dylan and I are all the way down here in Scranton, Pennsylvania?”

“Yes indeed.”

“Well, the reason why is because Dylan went ahead and did something completely stupid.” She turned and glared at her son, who glanced back when he heard his name.

“Dylan, get over here.”

I looked over at her curiously, as she called her son over. Looking back over, I saw Ricky say something, and Dylan rounded on him, so I tried something. “DYLAN MAURICE COLLINS, GET YOUR ASS OVER HERE.” when he didn’t completely turn around right away, I snapped. “NOW!” was when he turned heel and trotted over.

“Thank you, Jenny. Now, Dylan you tell her what you did.”

I was beyond confused. Reluctantly, I turned my attention toward my ex. I was met with the once bright blue eyes I fell in love with so long ago. Now all that I saw was a man that easily hid his true intentions behind a mask that offered kindness and love. I didn’t feel anything at all but anger, and sadness.

He just stared at me, as if he couldn’t believe that I was going to listen to him.

I glanced over to where Chris was standing, and I felt my insides float as he stared at me. The love I felt for him was real, the way he loved me was also real. I don’t know how I knew, but I just found myself knowing that he could never hurt me, not intentionally. He wasn’t wearing a mask, he was who he was, and never claimed to be anyone else but himself. I felt my lips turn up in a genuine smile as he watched me, a protective gaze resting on me.

“You really love him, don’t you?” I heard Dylan ask. I felt myself stiffen in anger at his intrusion. “Yes, I do. Is that a problem?” Turning towards him, I didn’t let him reply, instead I asked. “So what are you doing here.”

He sighed, and if I pinned his emotions correctly, he looked embarrassed and ashamed.

“After I, well you know,-” he struggled with his words, and I figured he was talking about his trip to the police station. “Your trip to the po-po’s lair?” I glared at him. He nodded.

“Well, I was bailed out. And in return for being bailed out, she asked me some questions.” I stared at him, trying to figure out where this was going.

“Some questions? She who?” I asked.

“This chick that paid my bail. She, she wanted to know about you.” The way he said ‘you’ made my blood run cold.

“What do you mean, about me.” I ground out the words, knowing they were louder than I intended. He flinched, but he continued. “Yeah, they wanted to know about you, who your family was, what you disliked, what you liked, who and well anything that they could think of they asked.”

“Who asked?”

“Sabrina.” Forget my blood running cold, I felt as if my body froze completely as he said that name.

“Sabrina who?” Chris was beside me in an instant. Dylan looked from me too Chris.

“Sabrina Woods.” Even Chris couldn’t ground out a reply when he heard that last name. Of course he couldn’t, because she was the one cheated on him and left him when he was at his lowest.


~


I was sitting outside on the steps of a gazebo, talking too my sister Anna. After the guys and I had left the clearing, kicking up dust in our wake, it had become eerily quiet and too intense for me too be around them once I dropped them off at Chris’ place, I had taken it upon myself to leave the vicinity and clear my head. No one seemed too want to protest that, so I relaxed once I got to the gazebo in the park nearby.

“I just can’t believe it. Dylan went and blabbed everything about you too some fucking chick that he doesn’t even know.”

I sighed, bringing my fingers up too push my bridge piercing, moving the metal bar side to side, in an attempt to calm myself.

“I know, and the guys are pissed. Like no one said a word after we left. Even Devin was quiet. Whatever happened with this Sabrina person, must have been a lot worse than what I’ve been told.”

I heard Anna blow a gust of air through the phone, making it sound like it was storming over there.

“Well, I hope for your sake, that you get some information soon. I’m glad you called though, I was worried about you.”

“Why’s that?” I asked.

“You're my sister, do I need a reason otherwise?” She chuckled, and I laughed. “No, I guess not. Thanks for listening to my tale of woe though.”

“Always. Anyways, what are you doing for our birthday this year?” I shook my head, the thought not even registering properly.

“I don’t know. I guess I have a lot of my mind now too not even think about it.”

“Hmm, thats shitty. Anyways, I gotta let you go, I need to get Nova too sleep. I’ll talk to you later, okay Jenny?”

“Alright, sister dear. Love you.”

“Love you to, bye.” I heard the dial tone as she hung up, and I was met up with silence yet again. I put my phone down beside me, pulling my jacket around me.

Why is this happening? What does it mean? How is any of this making sense at all!? My thoughts tiraded me with problems I wasn’t ready to handle. That woman wanted too know my family, what I like to do, who I hated, who I cared for most. Dylan blabbed everything he knew about me, which in reality was quite a lot. Why did she want to know!? My internal scream met the persistent silence in a furiating stalemate.

I just sat there, putting my hands in my hair, pulling at it in frustration. I felt a scream at the back of my throat, wanting to yell out too the world how pissed I was. I growled out, feeling cold tears run down my face. I bent over as if in pain, trying to keep myself composed, like I always have. I felt hands on my shoulders and I jumped, turning around preparing my muscles for a fight, only to relax when I saw Ricky standing over me.

His facial features showed surprise, and he immediately sat down beside me, moving my phone out of the way and his arm came around my shoulders to comfort me.


“Jen, what's wrong, are you okay? Chris was wondering where you where.”

I sniffled, trying to contain my tears. “Sorry, I just needed time to think and I don’t even know why I’m crying. Sorry.” He rubbed my arm and pulled me against his neck, while my throat clenched around painful sobs. I was always apologizing, it was so annoying. Why was I apologizing for crying? Oh, because I felt weak. So weak. It pissed me off.

“It’s alright. It’ll be okay.” I could tell Ricky was trying too make this less awkward for both of us, and I felt bad that he was trying to calm me down, but it made me feel better that he was actually trying to comfort me.

“I’m sorry Ricky.” My hand flew up too my face, and I wiped the tears off of my face hastily. “It’s fine. I think we’re all a little upset with these turns of events.”

I nodded. He stood up and pulled me along with him, he handed me my phone and he led the way back to Chris’ house; back home.

We spoke little, not really knowing what to say, the topic of the conversation was usually saddening.

“I have something to ask.” Ricky spoke softly. “Mhm?” I looked over at him. “Was that woman you were talking to today, the one you told me about that was in the hospital?” I raised my brow and nodded. “Yeah, thats her. Her name is Maire.” I felt a tug of a smile come too my lips. “She’s Dylan’s mother, as I bluntly pointed out, and for the few years that Dylan and I were together she was like an actual mother figure to me.”

“Yeah, I heard your real moms a character.” I was going to flinch, but he used the word so carefully, I just nodded. “Yeah, she is, she was barely in my sisters and I’s life that any other mother we met seemed to know, and they tried to become our mother, if only for a short while.” I let out a dry chuckle, no humour at all found in my voice. “Pretty depressing, huh?”

“I would say so, no offence intended.”

“Believe you me, I am not offended. We haven’t been on the best terms as of late. Before you, Chris and Josh came to see me when I was in Truro, I was near close to snapping her in two.” He let out a laugh.

“At least Chris’ mom loves you.” His attempt to lighten the mood worked, because I felt myself blush and laugh. “She’s very sweet. And I’m glad she likes me, some people don’t, mind you.” I snorted, and laughed even more, causing Ricky too laugh. “Did you just?” He snickered, and I replied. “Yes, I snorted. Shut up.” Sending us spiralling into more laughter. Ricky had his own ways to cheer me up, and I was extremely grateful for it.

We soon made our way up the driveway, and I noticed a certain tall lanky figure pacing in front of the living room window. It stopped and I watched as I saw Chris’ face appear in the window, his face relaxing as he saw Ricky and I. He disappeared again, and the door opened up. It didn’t take him long to walk down the walkway, taking long strides up to me. I stopped and waited for him to face me.

But he didn’t do what I expected him to do. He didn’t break stride as his arms came around my hips and pulled me up too him. I screeched, my hands flying too grab onto his shoulders for balance. It never ceased to surprise me when I’m reminded how strong he really was.

“Woman, you had me worried sick about you.” His tone was pained, but jubilant as he adjusted me too come down too his eye level. I stared at his beautiful features in the dying light of the sunset, his eyes were golden, shimmering in the light. My hand made its way too his fast growing ivory black hair. Although it was dyed, and I thought I preferred natural, but with Chris I didn’t care. No matter what color his hair was, it just seemed too make him more handsome. Making me feel more unworthy of his affection, but as I always seem to think; if it was wrong too love him, then I never wanted to be right. Cliche, but it worked.

“Beautiful Virginia, what are you thinking?” He murmured. I ran my fingers through his hair, not really saying anything, just enjoying staring at him. I gave a smile, and whispered. “Sorry, for worrying you, I just needed to think.” I snaked my arms around his neck, and kissed his forehead. “And to answer your question, I’m just admiring you.” I pressed my forehead against his, looking him in the eye, I saw his perfect pale lips turn upwards in a sexy smile.

“I should be the one saying that.”
“Well, too bad, I beat you too it.” I claimed his lips with my own, and I felt a smile threaten to ruin it as Chris’ hold on me became tighter. It did ruin it, but I felt him smile to, and when I pulled back he was smiling broadly, like he was relieved.

“Ready to go inside?” He asked. I nodded. He turned around and I frowned. “I have two feet and, are ready for this?” I paused for dramatic effect. “I have a heartbeat too, which means I can walk just fine.” Sarcasm lacing my words.

“I didn’t notice.” He shrugged and continued walking with me still in his arms. “Ricky! Help!” I looked down at him, pouting at him. He put his hands up, “Don’t drag me into this.” He laughed.

“Bitch.” I muttered.

“Jerk.” He smirked.



________________


Three days passed without incident from Chris’ ex. But then again we weren’t exactly sure what to expect. I mean it’s not like she really did anything, yet, apparently. The guys were on some kind of alert though. Pretending to check up on me when I was alone, or at work. Too be honest, it was sort of annoying. I loved that they cared enough to check up on me, but coming too my work, or spying on me when I was working on my story was just getting out of hand. And Chris with the bathroom. I let out an annoyed sigh.

These thoughts where the ones that annoyed me in the mornings, like a really fucking annoying wake up call. So I laid there, feigning sleep, while trying to fight off the nagging thoughts and go back to sleep. It was my day off today and I wanted to enjoy it.

Maybe Sabrina was the one who spread those rumours about me and my niece. I frowned, pulling my arm over my already closed eyes. That just made things a whole lot worse. Because it actually made sense. Goddamnit.

I heard the door open, and I jumped, my arm flying down too my side, and my eyes peeled themselves open. My heart thudded, after the mini heart attack.

Chris was walking over to the dresser in his room, I watched as he went and pulled at the drawer, going through it, grumbling to himself about ‘it’s too early for this shit’, and then let out a sigh when he found what he was looking for. He turned around, and I shut my eyes, and slowly and sluggishly turned myself on my side, muttering, pretending to still be asleep.

I heard him give a low laugh, and I could tell he was smiling. I listened to his footsteps, and the bed shifted slightly under his weight. My hair fell in my face, and I let out an angry groan, halfheartedly blowing at it, too get it out of my face because it made my face itch. I felt his fingers trail up my face and push it out of the way. He patted my hair back, and I grinned in my sleepiness. Still putting the front of pretending to be asleep, I followed the hand that slowing left my hair and I snuggled into his thigh. His hand came back down too my head again, playing with my hair again. “You’re adorable when you sleep.” I heard him whisper. I felt the bed move and I felt his piercings touch the top of my head, telling me he was kissing it. The bed shifted again, and I heard his footsteps recede, and the door opened and shut again.

I was alone once more. I felt myself grow tired again, and fell back to sleep, the thoughts of earlier long since forgotten.

“Hey, hun. Wake up, I have a Full Throttle for you.” Chris’ voice was low and dreamy sounding, and he was rubbing my back, in an attempt to wake me up. I pulled my eyes open and turned around to face him. “God I love you.” I murmured, my voice thick with sleep.

“Me or the energy drink?” He joked. I blew out a breath, laughing. “Both.” Earning a small chuckle from him.

I struggled to get up, my body feeling heavy from sleeping so long. I took a deep breath and swung myself up into a sitting position. My head dropping, Chris passed me my energy drink, giving me a kiss on the head. “I’ll let you get ready. I’ll be downstairs.”

“Mm, okay.” I mumbled, lifting my head up too give him a sleepy smile. He kissed me on the cheek, and my face heated up from the contact. Grinning like a fool, I watched him walk out of the bedroom too let me get ready.

I took a deep breath, and slipped out of bed, going over to grab my clothes out of my designated drawer. I pulled out some short shorts, thinking I wasn't going to be doing much of anything today, and one of Chris’ sleeveless Misfits shirts. The fucker had one to many, but I didn't complain, they were comfy to wear. I grabbed my favorite black lace bra, and walked out of the bedroom into the bathroom. I used the bathroom, slowly brushing my teeth and then my hair, pulling it into a ponytail. I washed my face, in an attempt to wake myself up. I shivered, as cold droplets of water trailed down my chest, but I was awake.

I changed, looking myself in the mirror, feeling satisfied with my appearance, I walked back out to the bedroom, grabbing my Full Throttle. Pulling the tab , it opened with a hiss. I took a long drink, enjoying the citrus taste, and tingle from the caffeine.

“Time to join the land of the living, I guess.” I muttered to myself. I made my way too the stairs, taking my sweet ol’ time, moving slowly, step by step. I started humming Panic Room by Theory of a Deadman. We're running out of air, ain't seen the light of day, living life scared so I hide myself away.The lyrics played along in my mind, too keep up with the tempo. I got too the last step, and walked around the corner to go sit in the living room.

I stopped dead at the sight before me. The living room was full of people, and all their eyes were on me, as if they were waiting for me too come down. My face burned from the attention, and the fact that I was wearing the shortest shorts I owned. My sister and my niece and Kyle, Chris’ mother and father, Josh, Ghost, Ricky, and Ryan where there. Along with Angelo. Megan Massacre? Mia? George?

WHAT THE FUCK? I screamed internally. I slowly backed away and made my way back upstairs, practically running like a chimpanzee to get away from them.

“Hey Jen come back!” I heard Chris call. “Yeah JenJen!” Nova called.

“Not until I put some pants on, I’m not.” I shouted down to them. I heard them all laugh. How dare they? I quickly changed into some skinny jeans, not really bothering with my top, even though it was loose as all hell, and showed off more than a regular shirt would, at least I had pants on now. God, I was going to strangle them.

I hurried back down the steps, grabbing the corner of the wall and propelling myself into the living room. Chris was standing among everyone, grinning his infamous grin. I took a sip of my drink, trying to distract myself from all the stares. “So, umm.” I gave them a confused look. “Whats the occasion?” I steeled myself for the answer. Anna just snorted and started laughing. “Sister, did you really forget our birthday?”

My eyes widened, and I slapped my forehead, turning around and walked into the kitchen. I forgot my own damn birthday. I heard a chorus of laughter, and a lot of movement.

I felt multiple arms around me, including Chris and Anna. “Happy Birthday Jenny.” My face turned from pink too lava red in two seconds from the mere fact that I forgot my sisters and I’s birthday. I looked around too see Ghost, Josh, Chris and Anna and of course Nova hugging me all awkwardly. Tears where pooling in my eyes before I could stop them. I set my drink on the table, and twisted around to put my arms around my sister. “Happy Birthday Anna.” My heart was hurting, but in a good way. “I can’t believe I forgot.” I felt everyone elses arms recede as me and my sister hugged.

“Love you, sis.” I croaked out. “Love you to Jen.” She squeezed me, and I felt all the love she has given me all her life. Ever since she was born, shes been my first best friend, my partner in crime. And I was extremely happy that we could celebrate our birthday together again. I looked over at Chris, who was giving me this adoring look, and a little bit bashful.

I stopped hugging my sister, and she explained. “Chris got us down here, he wanted me and you too have our birthday together. So he invited everyone that he knew that you were close too. So here we are.” My sister beamed at me.

“And I’m glad you’re finally awake, I don’t know like anyone here except you, Chris and those other two guys.” Her eyes widened in her dramatics and I gave a short laugh.

I looked over at Chris, and rushed him, tackling him in a hug. “Thank you so much, Chris.” my chest expanded he held me against him, pulling me tight. “Happy Birthday Beautiful.” He murmured. “I love you, so much.” I whimpered from crying. “Hey now, no crying. It’s your birthday.” I laughed despite my tears of joy. “If it’s my birthday, then I’ll cry if I want too.” Referring too the song by Lesley Gore It’s My Party. He didn't correct me and I was glad he didn't, he just lead me too the living room, and I was immediately tackled to the ground by my best friends, George and Mia. “Happy Birthday JJ!” I stared at the ceiling and sighed, happy. “Thanks guys, can I get up now?”

“Maybe.”


I was confused as to why Megan and Angelo were here, but I appreciated it nonetheless. I only met Megan once, months and months ago when she helped me finish my sleeve. But she still came and gave me a hug, asking me how the tattoo was holding up, and how I was.

I was sitting in the lazy boy now, holding Nova on my lap, finishing off my energy drink. “Present time!” She screeched, when she saw Anna bring over a gift. It was in a skull bag with flames, and I just immediately adored it. “Is that from you?” I asked her, and she nodded.

“Here Vee, let me get up.” The little girl jumped down and I quickly maneuvered my way to the guest room behind me. I grabbed the bag that I had put Annas present in it and took it outside too the others. “Here.” She smiled and grabbed the bag out of my hands, while I sat back down and started digging through mine. I was well aware that everyone's eyes were on us, and I couldn't help but be a little flustered.

My hands met something wooden, and polished to the touch. I took it out, and my heart went too my throat. I looked at Anna and then back at the present. I didn't even get to say thank you, before she put her finger up to silence me.

I smiled so hard my face hurt. “Me next.” Ghost came over and sat on the armrest of the chair, handing me a little box. It was pure black, and I had a feeling that most of the presents where going to look like this. “You didn't have to.-” I started, but he flicked my shoulder. “Open it.” He pouted, “Please.” I sighed, not really wanted to have an argument with him on my birthday. I took the lid off the box, and inside it held a book. I raised my eyebrow at him, curious. Upon closer inspection, it was a leather binding, it looked worn but when I opened the pages, I saw that the pages felt new but looked old, it wasn't overly big, only a few pages long. But what peaked my surprise even more was the title.

The Quiet Girl:
Virginia Soren

My eyes widened in surprise and curiosity. I looked at Ghost, a half frown on my face. “You can read the majority of it later. Turn to the last page.”

I did as he asked and flipped too the last page. It read.

~
I suppose you’re wondering why we made this for you.
But let us tell you first at how it came to be.

There was once a girl. And she drove a pitch black Impala.
We were coming back from a long tour. Worn and weary.
Coming too the last few miles, until the RV got us home.

We heard a roar. And suddenly we were passed by this classic car.
Chris and Josh stared in awe, and saw that a woman was driving.
They clamored and shouted, about how we should inspect it closer.

Suddenly this woman turned off, and we saw the opportunity to follow.
She seemed oblivious to the fact we followed behind her, and we watched as she went into the store.

I sucked in my lips, trying not to smile, and giggle at the little story. I kept reading.

When she came back out, she was talking on the phone we noticed. So we waited.
When it was clear that she was done, we decided Chris to be the one to talk to her.
We needed to get something to eat anyway, so while the rest of us went to the store, Chris scared her.

We watched as she ducked down in her seat, and we took that as a hint that she knew who we were.
When she seemingly regained her composure. She talked too all of us, with a smile that seemed to be contagious, as she made us laugh and smile.
We soon became fast friends, talking and hanging out when we could.

And soon Chris Motionless fell in love with this girl.

My heart pounded.

And then she somehow convinced Ricky Olson too stop smoking.

Tears pricked my eyes again, my vision becoming blurry.

Ghost even considered her one of her best friends.
Ryan found someone who he could jam with, without asking and annoying the rest of the band.
And Josh found someone who he could joke around with, and pull hilarious pranks with.

I wiped my eyes, so I could keep reading the story that was bringing me to tears.

What we’re trying to say is, you've affected our lives in very different ways.
Some more than others.
But we couldn't be more happier too have you as a fan and a friend, and a companion.

We love you Jenny. Thanks for sticking around and being our friend.

I looked at the bottom of the page and they all signed the bottom of it. I felt tears drip down my cheeks. My heart felt full. Way too full, like it was going to burst at any second.

“Are you sad, Aunty JenJen.” Nova asked, since she was the one who could see my face. I took a stuttering breath. “N-no, Nova, these are happy tears.”

I closed the book, and held it too my chest, trying to keep it away from the cursed tears that were falling so freely. I looked at the large group before me, picking out the faces of the band, and I cried even more. “It’s not fair, you all made me cry twice in one day.”

“Ah, but its a good kind of cry.” Damn Balz, making me laugh through my tears. They all smiled at me, and I couldn't handle it. I put my hand over my mouth, to silence overpowering sob fest that wanted out. Devin leaned down and rested his head on mine.

God damn these men and there ways to make a girl cry.

Notes

Birthday to be continued. More tears to come me thinks!

Enjoy!