Viviana p.o.v.

I woke up with a bad hangover, my head hurt like hell and I still felt the disgusting taste of vomit and alcohol mixed.
Ugh!
I crawled outside my bed just to reach the bathroom and took a long shower, it helped a little but I was very in need of some painkiller.
So I went downstairs and I found my sister in the kitchen, she was very pissed off, you could say that by the way she slamed the saucepan for the pancakes and the toaster.
“Good morning.”
She gave me a deadly look.
“Good morning, Viviana.
Nice to see you sober sometimes.”
I groaned.
“Sofia, it was just a night.”
“Two nights. What are you gonna do? Stay passed away all the time to not think about Jaime?”
I started to feel nervous.
“You have no right to judge, you’re not my mother!”
“But I’m your sister! And I’m worried for you, yesterday a complete stranger brought you home completely drunk. What if he was a killer or a maniac?”
“He was a good guy, I met them before and he prevented me to do a really stupid thing!”
The look in her eyes become more deadly, if it was possible. She was beyond pissed off.
“What?”
“Take some drugs.”
I said too quietly.
“ARE YOU MENTAL? AFTER ALL THE SHIT THAT YOU SAW GOING ON WITH ME, YOU WOULD TAKE SOME DRUGS? AFTER SAW HOW DANGEROUS IT IS, AFTER MY PROBLEMS WITH THE COCAINE?”
I never heard her scream in this way and I was a little scared, also because Fanny and Tony came in the kitchen too.
“Little blue hair what’s up?”
Tony tried to calm her down, but she pushed him away.
“It happens that after all my problems with drugs, Viviana wanted to be rebellious and take some drugs.”
“He’s just upset for Jaime…”
“That’s not a solid explanation!”
I got up furious.
“Shut the fuck up, Sofia! You have no right to reproach anyone, you are just a little ex junkie, suicidal and with ED. You are just a mess with no right to talk!”
Her eyes widened, then she walked towards me – there were just fury and hate in his blue eyes – and slapped me strong. After that she left the kitchen without saying a word.
My cheeks hurt and I felt that both Tony and Fan were kinda angry with me now.
“Nice try, Viviana. You are the best sister in the world!”
“Fuck you, because of you she tried to kill herself, don’t ever forget.”
Tony gave me a disgusted look and left the room too.
I came back to my room, I wore a white dress with red and orange flowers on it and with tiny straps, then I grabbed some painkiller and my beg.
I went out and I reach the local in which I was yesterday, I took my car and I drove to a bar. Here I ordered a cappuccino and a brioches, I ate it and finally I took my painkiller.
I had no idea of where to go, I need someone to talk to, but who?
Liz would probably busy with Vic, Mike was not the kind of guy who likes listen to girls complains, so I phoned Leah.
“Ehy, Leah. It’s me Viviana. Can I come to your house?”
“Sure, but not now. Well, there’s Jaime here, he will be away in an hour, I think.”
“Fine, I will be there in an hour.”
I was looking blankly outside the window when someone tipped on my shoulder, making me gasp.
I looked up and I saw Matt’s shyly smile.
“Ehy, nice to see you, Matt!”
I smiled at him.
“Nice to meet you too. Did I scared you?”
“Not that much, I was just lost in my thoughts. I have got a free hour and I don’t know how to spend it, plus I fought with my sister.”
He sat down quietly. I love how he’s always nice and quiet, instead loud and outgoing like Jaime.
“Why?”
“Because if what happened yesterday. The pills story.
She yelled at me, I yelled at her and know we are not talking.”
“What do you yell?”
“It’s complicated, Matt and someway private. I don’t wanna discuss it in a bar, I don’t wanna anybody listen to it.”
He nodded.
“I know a quiet place, it’s on the beach.”
“Ok, let’s go and thanks for being there, listening to me.”
“No problem, as I said yesterday I love people’s stories.”
I smiled again, I love this guy attitude!
I followed him outside of the bar and this time he sat on the passenger seat and gave me indications. In the end we reached an abandoned wooden pier, it seemed the perfect place to tell someone all yours and your family problems.
“Well, what’s up?”
“My sister was beyond furious because I came back home drunk for two night and she reproached me, that’s drove me mad and I told her some horrible things.
Well, my sister was forced to take cocaine and it was hard for her to quit, she was also anorexic and suicidal. I screamed to her that she was just a little ex junkie with a bunch of problems and no right to tell me what to do.
She slapped me in the face and went away.
It was bitchy, I know, but… Fuck, it’s horrible when a sister treat you like a five years old, who is not able to say what is right and what is wrong.
I just needed some fun, why didn’t she understand?”
“I think because she was just worried about you. She came from a bad behavior and wanted to protect you.”
“Matt, I’m perfectly able to protect myself.”
“Are you so sure? Yesterday you were about to get high.”
I sighed, that’s true.
“You are right, but it was just a moment.”
“I know, but it could happen again and again. I struggled with cocaine too, so I understand why your sister is so worried.”
I watched him surprised, I could never tell it!
We talked a bit more about my situation and then I noticed that the hour was gone.
“Matt, I gotta go.”
“Okay!”
He walked toward me and kissed me, I kissed him back and when we tore apart I felt strange: a bit guilty and a bit happy.
I need to talk with Leah NOW.
I drove Matt at his house and I headed to Leah’s house, she lived in a place near the ocean, her back garden was next to the beach.
I rang her bell and she came, she was wearing a simple black dress and she seemed relaxed.
“Do you finally sleep?”
“Yeah, I took some pills and I finally sleep. What about you?”
“I’m in a big mess.”
“Let’s talk about inside, do you wanna something?”
“Some ice tea.”
She nodded and brought two cans of tea.
“Tell me.”
I briefly tell her about how I felt seeing Jaime kissing another girl, my meet with Matt, the fight with Sofia and the kiss.
“Girl, you are in a big mess for sure.
Tell me, do you still like Jaime?”
I stayed silent for a while, it was a difficult question for me right now.
“Well, it’s not easy to answer. Before of all Jess’s mess I would say yes, but now I’m not so sure. I mean, Jaime was the first who treat me like a human being in ages and I obviously fell for that, it was so good. Maybe I don’t love him, maybe it was just a crush and we should stay friends.
With Matt is different, I like him a lot and it’s easy for me to talk to him. Plus I can feel some kind of connection with him, something that I never tried before.”
“It’s called attraction.”
She smiled to me.
“When a person is fascinating like Matt you could be attract to him.”
“Yeah, but he kissed me. It must mean something.”
“That Jaime fucked up his chance to have you.”
I looked her in shock.
“What?”
“I think that now you are going to fall in love with Matt, because you feel must accepted and loved by him.”
“Well, I dunno. I’m so confused.”
“Don’t worry, the right answer will come and you’ll know what to do.
I hoped it was true, because I felt I was in a big mess and – for strange reason – a part of me was happy with that and kept thinking about the kiss between me and Matt.
Oh, my God! What I should do?

Notes

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This is Leah dress
and this is Viviana dress