“I’ll be home when I’m sleeping. I can’t hardly wait.”




MIKE POV

The stench of the tour bus was beginning to be ripe enough to knock a grown man unconscious. I was beginning to get irritated with every single person on this bus, mainly because I was in a bad mood all the time. Ever since I told Bonnie that I loved her and she denied me, I've been a mess of whiskey and random girls. Why did I always medicate this way? Why did I always set myself up for disaster?

I had wanted to plan to get her back, but I couldn't come up with anything. I feel like she was officially thrown into this world where I did not belong. I mean, how did I even get her in the first place? She’s fucking perfect and I’m not. I suppose that’s why she chose Steven over me. He seems to be perfect just like she is. As much as everyone was telling me to give up, to move on, I couldn’t. She was stuck in my brain. She was living in there. There’s no way she just didn’t feel the same way I did.

I hurried backstage seeing as how it was time to start prepping for the show tonight. There were four busses filled with band and crewmembers, all these people crowding around the areas. I figured there were enough people around here to make me not feel lonely, but regardless, I did. Love is weird. Heartache is even weirder. I suppose I had spent most of my life ignoring it, so I just didn’t know it would hurt this bad. Love is supposed to make you feel blissful and out of this world.

We all spend most of our lives looking for something that could very well be right in front of our eyes. There was nothing more in the world that I wanted more than Bonnie. We’d be back in LA in a couple of days and that’s when I was gonna take my shot. I was gonna get her alone. I know Bonnie; I know that she must love me. We had a special thing going. And after this time, if she really didn’t love me, then I’d back off. I’d leave her be and let her go off and have a happily ever after with Steven.

BONNIE POV

Things felt so in place I was going to lose my mind. Steven was back at work with my dad and I was back on buying sprees for the spring. I was really excited because I had got some really cool ideas for the site and for the buyers. The weather was still cool here in Los Angeles, but typical for a January here. Today was going to be a great day and I knew it because my coffee was perfect, my breakfast was perfect, and my buying was going just as smoothly.

After an afternoon of shopping and buying stuff for other clothing stores, I had headed on back home. I did some laundry, then sprawled out all of my ideas from magazines and fashion show clippings and was putting things together; the usual for me. I was chewing on the pen cap, occasionally taking it out for some item circling, then back in my mouth to cure my anxiety.
Soon enough there was a couple of knocks on my door and once I opened it, Steven waltzed in with the biggest smile on his face. “What are you doing Friday night?” He questioned after he kissed my lips.

“Um, wine in bed? Why, what’s the Friday plans babe?” I responded as I collapsed on my couch and covered my legs with the blanket.

He sat down beside me and let me rest my legs on him as he spoke, “Black’s retirement party and they are both going to surprise announce my partnership to everyone. Everyone’s invited. My family is going to be there, I want Cam and Nic to be there, and most importantly, I want you to be there. Will you be there?”

I grinned, “Of course baby! I wouldn’t miss it for the world. I’m so excited for everyone to hear the news.”

His smile shone brightly, “Me too. This is going to be a huge night for me. I feel like this is what I’ve been waiting for my entire life.”

“You have been waiting for this your entire life. You’ve worked so hard for this. I’m so proud of you, Steven.”

“Thank you, princess. Thank you.” He leaned over and kissed me sweetly.

---

FRIDAY NIGHT

The aura in the finely decorated room was enough to make anyone feel like a champion. Everyone was happy and feeling positive about the next chapter in the firm's book; the Steven and my dad chapter. Black had paid his dues and was retiring one of the most successful lawyers in California's history. It wasn't just the family and friends of Black's that were here, other lawyers and firms were here to pay their respects. I suppose this is why Steven didn't want me to tell his parents that he made partner, replacing Black. Because my dad was going to announce it himself here tonight and Jack and Dana, along with other members of his firm including his brother, were here.

Steven, Nicole, Cam, and I were sitting at a round table with my parents and Black and his wife, Brenda. We all had champagne, me and Nicole opting for a fine Rosé champagne, and were ready to celebrate a once in a life- time career here. I looked nice, I was getting drunk off of really delicious Rosé and my man was getting announced as partner tonight. What could go wrong during this perfect night?

First, my dad went up to the podium and spoke some words and funny stories about Black and how they began the firm a long thirty years ago. Then, after applause, Black went up and began his speech. The same outline, really. How he's accomplished this and that, and how he couldn't do it without my dad and so on and so forth. I was beginning to get bored as was Nic, so we chugged our drinks a little just in time for more refills from the waiter. This was Black's retirement speech so it was going to be long and boring.

Steven was up there sitting beside my dad on the stage, ready to be announced and it made me so proud of him. He's worked so hard for this moment. He was on Cloud 9 and nothing could ruin it.

Well, at first, nothing could ruin it.

Moments later, we all hear fast and loud foot steps running into the banquet hall causing all of our attention to turn to the man that began to shout my name and look for me frantically. Once my vision cleared up, I noticed that man to be Mike.

"You've got to be fucking kidding me." I said once I turned to Nicole. He ran towards me and I saw Steven's face fall from the stage.

"I need to talk to you, Bonnie." Mike said, out of breath as he was looking over his shoulder. He was beginning to pull me out of my chair and soon we were in the middle of the room.

My anger wanted to explode through me but I couldn't let everyone see how pissed off I was. "Mike, what the fuck do you think you're doing?" I asked through gritted teeth. The room was silent and I felt every set of eyes on me.

"This." He stared into my eyes and dropped down on one knee causing gasps to come from every corner of the room. I looked at Nicole and her eyes got wide as she ran over to us and tried her hardest to get Mike to leave. I was cringing so hard I think my eyesight was gonna fail. "I know that I fucked up and nothing can change that, but I love you. I realized that. I've never loved anyone before in my entire life. Will you marry me?" He pulled out a black box with a diamond ring inside of it.

"Mike, how hard is it to leave me alone? Why can't you leave me alone?"

He still looked persistent then his eyes went from me to the giant security guard approaching us. "Miss Bonnie, do you know this man?" The security guy that I had grown to know named Felix asked me.

I shook my head, eyesight not breaking Mike's, "No."

"Sir, you're gonna have to come with me." He picked Mike up off his knees with one swipe and dragged him out of there.

I looked at everyone around me, in awe of what just happened. I looked at Steven and he looked unbelievably hurt. I closed my eyes and Black smiled at me and nodded, letting me know he was gonna take care of this one.

"And of course, there's Bonnie fighting off guys like usual! Steven man, you sure got yourself a wanted woman." He joked, making everyone in the room laugh. Steven chewed on his lip as he nodded and faked his laugh along with everyone else's real ones.

I sat back in my chair and looked down at the table, tossing back the glass of Rosé, ready for this night to be over with. Nic eyed me, rubbing my back and looking at Cam after a while. "How did he know we were here?"

He made a face, "I may have mentioned it..."

Mine and Nicole's heads snapped to Cam, "Why would you tell him?"

"I didn't say where we were gonna be. I just said that you and I were attending this dinner thing for Bonnie's dad's work. I'm so sorry. I didn't know he was gonna fucking to that." Cam explained looking genuinely apologetic.

My attention went back to the stage where my dad and Black were about to announce Steven as the new partner for Black and Perez. This was the greatest moment in his life and of course Mike had to fucking ruin it. Not only did that happen in front of him, but his family, his friends, my parents. How embarrassing.

"This was the easiest decision for us to make on who would help me continue to run this place, a man who's can outsmart even the brightest mind, a man who has the utmost passion for law and a man who've I've been proud enough to call my own protégé over the last few years. Black and Perez' new and official partner, Steven Bohn!" My dad announced with a bright smile on his face, everyone stood up and clapped, as did Nicole, Cam, and I.

I looked over and saw the look of shock on his dad and brother's faces and the look of pride on his mother's. My eyes adverted back to Steven as his million dollar smile shone widely for all to see in his proudest moment. He began to say a few words, thanking my dad and Black for teaching him all he knows. He thanked a few others, like his parents and brother before taking a deep breath, "Last but not least, I have to thank my girlfriend Bonnie. Over the last five years, whether we were together or not, you always supported my career and me. A lot of time together was sacrificed just so I could study or prepare for a case. And I thank you for that. I love you." He looked me in my eyes and smiled softly, and I returned it back, feeling like I was about to cry my eyes out.

He grinned, "I'm officially partner at the best law firm in California. I can't wait for this new chapter." He said finally before giving a nod to everyone in the room and giving Black and my dad both hugs to the roomful of applause before him.

"I'm about to have a heart attack." I said to Nicole, who stuck her lip out and hugged me from my side. My heart really did feel like it was going to explode from everything that happened in the last fifteen minutes.

Eventually, Steven, Black, and my dad came to sit back down at the table. They were all smiles and Steven leaned down and whispered in my ear, "Can we talk outside for a second?" I nodded, getting up and following him out of the banquet doors as our arms were linked.

It was quiet for a second when we stepped outside and were at the front of the building. His hands were in his pockets and you could tell he was overwhelmed with everything also. "What was he doing here?" He asked point blank.

I shrugged, "I have no idea. Cam told him what they were going to but not where we were gonna be. I guess he figured it out."

"That son of a bitch is fucking up everything, Bonnie. Every time. It's pissing me off! He fucking proposed to you. With a ring and everything! Who the fuck does he think he is? And why does he think he still has a shot with you?" The frustration was written clearly on his face and it made me feel bad. Not like I had control over someone else's actions, but still. "If I go to New York, I really want you to come with me. Like move there with me."

My body felt heavy all of a sudden. "Are you planning on taking over the New York one?"

Just when I thought he was going to say yes, he shrugged. "I don't know. Your dad keeps asking me. I told him what about you, and he said, in these words exactly, 'What about Bonnie? You can't make every decision with her in mind.' That didn't sit well with me."

Was my dad right, though?

"Mike's getting in the way here. I mean, I know that you ran into him in New York but," He paused for a moment. "Nevermind."

"What?" I asked curiously.

"What if one day he comes up to you and you remember how happy you were with him and you don't think I can make you happy like he did? Because Bon, you were happy. I know it, I saw it with my own eyes. Your happiness didn't fade with him. It faded when you were with me."

And that was it. That was the truth bomb that Steven had been holding back for the last seven weeks. My heart broke at his true feelings.

I stepped over to where he was and wrapped my arms around the nape of his neck, coming face to face with him for the first time all night. "Steven, stop worrying about him. You are the man that I want to be with and have a future with. My happiness is because of you and only you. I love you. I cross my heart and hope to die."

He looked down at me and a smile grew softly, his hand resting on my lower back. "I love you too, Bon. I guess I'm just worried because this guy won't let up."

"Yeah, and it's irritating the shit out of me." I rolled my eyes making him chuckle. He pushed some fallen hair behind my ear and kissed my forehead gently before wrapping his arm around my neck.

He kissed the top of my head softly, "Come on, let's go back inside."

He took my hand and lead me back inside of the building so we could continue celebrating the night.


MIKE POV

I smushed out the cigarette that I had hanging from my mouth as I listened intently to the conversation between the girl I love and the man she so clearly loves. I heard them go back inside of the building and I came out from behind this large bush that was a close ten feet away.

I dug my phone out of my pocket and called my brother, Vic. The second he picked up the phone I said, "Well, I just did the actual stupidest thing a human can do."

"Let's see: robbery, murder, hardcore drugs. Anyone of those?"

I chuckled, "Nothing illegal. Just pretty stupid."

"Where are you?" He asked curiously before hearing my story.

"I'm outside of the Four Seasons Hotel in LA, with an engagement ring stuffed in my pocket, and maybe a few scuffs on me from being thrown out of the hotel."

"Four Seasons sounds like it'd be Bonnie's turf. Oh god. You didn't." You could hear how mortified he was just in his response alone.

"I did. I figured it was just some dinner thing, like that one we had gone too that one time. Well apparently, it was a retirement party slash Lets Announce That Steven is Officially a Partner Here party."

"How'd you find that out?"

"Cam told me after the fact. He text me asking if he needs to hire one of these attorneys for police brutality. He's such a dick."

"So, what happened?" The eagerness in his voice was clear, as it should be. This doesn't happen to just anyone.

"How much time do you have?" I laughed a little at my own pain. I had too. I couldn't show how hurt I was out in public.

"Plenty." He answered plainly, and I began my saga of a story and how I ended up right here in this very moment.

"Well, it all started when we had the show in New York a couple of weeks ago..." I began.

MIKE POV FLASHBACK


"I-it was nice seeing you. Have fun out there." She said lowly, standing up and adding a tap to my shoulder, then walking out of my dressing room.

I stared at the door and watched her leave, wondering if this was what was supposed to happen. Something was telling me it wasn't. She didn't love me, but I couldn't give up. It was clear that I needed her in my life; that she made it so much better the second she walked into it. Maybe I had to prove something to her. That her lifestyle didn't bother me. It just made me feel as if I could never give her what she wants, what she deserves. I'm a drummer, not a lawyer. That's all I'll ever be.

"You told her that you loved her?!" Vic shouted into the phone, interrupting my story.

"Yes, now shut the fuck up and listen!" I exclaimed, walking down some random street in hopes to find Vic's girlfriend's apartment; where he was at the moment. "Now anyway..."

BACK TO FLASHBACK

She walked out of that door and didn't look back at me and I kept wondering why this was happening. Why did I say those things that I said? Why did I overreact? Why was it her standing out of the hotel needing a cab that night? And then it all hit me. It hit me like a ton of bricks.

I rushed to the dressing room door and opened it quickly, hoping she would be there contemplating her future with me, but she wasn't. But I couldn't let her get away. Bonnie was not going to be the one that got away. Not now, not ever. I ran down to A Day To Remember's dressing room and knocked a hundred times but once the door was opened by their drummer Alex, all I saw was her friend and not her.

"Where's Bonnie?" I asked curiously, scanning the room once more.

Her friend looked up at me, "She left. She said she wasn't feeling well. I guess she went back to her apartment or something?"

Her apartment. How could I forget that gorgeous piece of property? I couldn't just leave the venue at that moment because we had a show to play, but the second we were off stage, I was heading over there.

And that's just what I did.

I got a cab to the building where I remembered her family's apartment to be at and slipped passed the doorman who couldn't have remembered me if he tried. I took the elevator up and it landed on her floor and after a brief debate with myself on if I should go left or right, I went right and found myself at her door.

This was it, this was my moment.

BACK TO REALITY

"Why were you trying so hard? She said nothing back to you when you said that." Vic stated as he was now in front of me with his girlfriend and they were listening intently to my story.

"Why do you keep interrupting my goddamn story? Shut. Up. Now, anyway..."

FLASHBLACK

My nerves were taking over my body and my palms were sweaty. I had to just do it; just ring the doorbell. So, I did. I rang it once, nothing. I rang it again, nothing. I knocked a few times, nothing. My face scrunched up and my nerves disappeared at the realization that she wasn’t here. I dug into my pocket and got my phone out and called Nicole.

“What’s up?” She greeted blankly.

“Would you ever stay in a hotel here in NYC?”

“Uh, what the fuck? Yes. Unless it were Bonnie’s place. Ooh wait,” I knew that if I just let her talk for a little, she’d spill some kind of juice. “And yeah, Steven has a spot there too. It was his family’s but it’s his place now. Oh and my friend…” I ignored her after that because she gave me exactly what I needed to know.

Of course he has a place here. I said to myself, rolling my eyes. Typical of this guy.

BACK TO REALITY

“Damn, they both got places in New York. That’s insane, man. Then what happened?” Vic interrupted me, yet again, and then fell back into the story.

“Vic, if you interrupt me one more goddamn time I’m going to knock all your teeth out.” I threatened, getting upset.

“Mike, go on.” His girlfriend Danielle said, gesturing over to me.

FLASHBACK

It occurred to me that she was practically living with him and that pissed me the fuck off. Tour was ending in a couple of days and I knew I had to do something big in order to get Bonnie back to me. And I knew just what to do.

The second we got back to San Diego, I went to the finest jewelry store in SD and got a ring that Bonnie was sure to love. Cam had told me that they were going to some dinner thing for Bonnie’s dad’s work on Friday, and that’s where I was going to be. I was going to lay it all on the line for her.

Once I got to the Four Seasons Hotel I noticed the doors were heavily secured with security guys. I had to sneak in somehow and get to her. Just as I was thinking that, there was some family walking in and I figured I’d go old school and blend in. I guess I thought I was the smartest guy there but apparently I wasn’t because the security guy was trying to stop me. I couldn’t be stopped now, so I just ran in and found the banquet hall that I figured they were in.

“Bonnie! Bonnie!” I kept shouting once I ran in and had every single person in that room looking at me. To my left, I noticed Bonnie sitting at a round table with Cam, Nic, her mom, and some other lady. I rushed over to her, and begged her to come with me. “I need to talk to you, Bonnie.” I dragged her a little bit and we ended up in the center of the ballroom. I was out of breath from running from the security man.

She was pissed. She was angry and it was obvious. "Mike, what the fuck do you think you're doing?" She asked through gritted teeth. The room was silent and we felt every set of eyes on us.

"This." I said staring into her beautiful eyes and dropped down on one knee causing gasps to come from every corner of the room. "I know that I fucked up and nothing can change that, but I love you. I realized that. I've never loved anyone before in my entire life. Will you marry me?" I then pulled out a black box with a diamond ring inside of it.

"Mike, how hard is it to leave me alone? Why can't you leave me alone?" She pleaded with a gravely voice.

My heart sank as she begged me to leave her alone. I noticed the same security guy who’d been chasing me ask Bonnie, "Miss Bonnie, do you know this man?"

She shook her head, her hair swishing back and forth, "No." Her eyes were cemented into mine and I knew that I fucked up even more.

"Sir, you're gonna have to come with me." The security man picked me up off of the floor and dragged me back outside. He tossed me onto the ground and told me to stay out and never come back again, and I laid there for a moment before I went and slid down the concrete wall some feet away behind a bush. And that’s where I heard them come outside about fifteen minutes later.

BACK TO REALITY

“And that’s what happened.” I sighed out, taking a swig of my beer.

“Holy shit.” Vic and Danielle said at the same time.

“I can’t believe you proposed to her, Mike.” Danielle said with a concerned look washed over her face.

“What happens now?” Vic asked curiously.

I shrugged, “I don’t know. I think I give up. She loves Steven, she always has. Who am I to get in between that?”

Notes