Danny's Journal

19 NOVEMBER 2012

Some dickhead from the coast crashed his car into the back of a lorry. When I came for him, he saw me, and looked me dead in the eye. I gave him the choice, and just like I had expected, he chose to live like me. I took him back to my place, stitched him up and let him stay with me for a while. His name is Oliver, and I only saved him because I noticed the bag of coke in the passenger seat of his car.

25 NOVEMBER 2012

So Oli has some sort of escape story. He says its just what he needed. He had cheated on his girlfriend, and she had found out and kicked him out of his apartment, he'd been banned from going to his favorite strip club because of a misunderstanding with some douche bag, and he'd wasted away all of his cash on drugs, sex and alcohol. Sort of reminded me of myself, to be fare. What a wanker. So he says, by joining the system its like a fresh start, and he will be able to leave it all behind.

30 DECEMBER 2012

It's new years eve, and I'm throwing the best fucking party all round. Oli and I have become brothers, inseparable from each other. We are like one person, and my life has gotten so much more fun now hes around. We do drugs in the morning, mid-day and in the afternoon. We've got girls walking in and out constantly, and there's not been a day without waking up to a quick blowie. It's been great. SJ came around today, said she would kick my ass if she ever saw me bring a single drug through the doors of the house again. I kicked her out, and I'm going to change the locks on this place.

2 FEBRUARY 2013

Helped Oli move into his new flat last week, but ever since he's been so distant. He's turning up less and less to my parties now. I call him all the fucking time, but he doesn't bother answering. I don't know what's going on, but I will visit him soon to check if he's alright.

15 FEBRUARY 2013

I tried knocking at his door. But he didn't reply. His bedroom light was on and I could see shadows through the window. I went around the back and climbed in through an open window. But now I wish we were never friends. He'd changed me, and then left me a float with a bite too big to swallow. And so I walk into his bedroom to find him fucking my sister. And after a lot of explaining, he got a bloody nose and a few death threats. What a tosser. My own fucking sister.



2 SEPTEMBER 2013

It had been months and months since I'd spoken to Oli or my sister. I tried calling, but I didn't seem to get any response. So I decided to give him a visit. Maybe some things should be forgiven. At least he only fucked her. He told me that dating a girl required something that he didn't quite understand and he would never be that guy. So when I turn up to his place, I meet his girlfriend. She looks insane, deep circles under her eyes and really pale skin. She seemed to jump at me, desperatly longing to be around me. It was a bit odd, but then, to be fair, Oli's pussy game wasn't as strong as mine.

3 SEPTEMBER 2013

After a lot of thinking and explaining, it sounded as though SJ and Oli did date, and he only just got this new girl. I didn't really like her all that much. I had no clue what appealed to Oli about her. But finding out they dated, well it made me mad.

10 OCTOBER 2013

So Rain comes knocking on my door, begging and pleading to me that it had all gone wrong between her and Oli. I took it as an opportunity. Twist him apart. And to make matters even worse, he'd got SJ pregnant.

25 OCTOBER 2013

Rain was my girlfriend, and I had her eating from my hands. I had gotten her taking more drugs through the day than I thought was even possible for such a skinny girl. She was shaky and always laughing, and best of all, she had no idea what she was doing. I will take her to a party tonight, and allow her get completely wasted. Then I'm going to take her to visit an old friend.

5 DECEMBER 2014

Rain was such a miserable bitch. I couldn't seem to get rid of her. She kept crying and whining and it was driving me crazy. I couldn't stand the way she pulled me around and shouted in my face all the time. I hit her in the eye yesterday, and now its black and swollen. I'm not allowing her outside again. I don't want people to think I'm the monster. I've been forcing her to take my bipolar tablets. She seems to be nuttier than me.

10 DECEMBER 2014

She didn't know I had been tracking her phone the whole time. She had no clue that I knew exactly where she had run away to. I just let her go with that swine Oliver to this hotel near his place. I stood in the car park today and watched him cry. He had a baby in the backseat, looked like it had been born pretty recently. Just thinking that I am the uncle to that child repulsed me.

15 DECEMBER 2014

I got a call from one of the chiefs. He said that there was going to be a bunch of us that needed to do a huge collection. He also apologized to me about SJ, and I found out that she was dead. Maybe I was filled with regret. I didn't know what it was that was eating me alive but it all seemed to crash when I found that out. I had always thought that things would even out between us when we got older. And Oli having to raise a baby on his own, well he must be having a tough time. And a beat that poor girl. I could have killed her. What the hell was I doing.

16 DECEMBER 2014

I didn't know she was on that plane when it crashed. I didn't know. He told me as it happened, and he saved her. But the problem with saving her was that the system doesn't allow that. So the system will have to force death on someone else who is close to you. So someone else in Oli's life was about to die. He must understand that is how it worked.

17 DECEMBER 2014

On this last page of my journal, I am going to plead to make everything alright again. I've bought this little place in the middle of no where for Oliver, Rain, the little kid and I. I'm going to stop taking drugs. I'm going to let them be happy together and I'm going to apologize for everything I have done. And I am going to warn rain about 2016.

Notes