You can't just turn back time

Tony's P.O.V.

I can't believe I just did that with Mike. I'm a soon-to-be-married man and I had sex with my middle school best friend and long time crush. How fucked am I if someone finds out? I don't even want to think about it.

"Tony, you wanna get in the shower?" Mike asked with a wink. I felt myself turn red. I've been here since last night, we were up talking about things and it even got on a serious note when he apologized for being a jerk in middle school. Here's a little run through on how it went.

**FLASHBACK**

"I'm sorry, Tony..." Mike spoke. We were laying in bed, his hand was tracing my entire body, kisses were occasionally landing on my neck, and his belly was pressed against my back.

"For what?" I asked. I was still in that after-sex-daze.

"For doing what I did in middle school...I should be the one you're getting married to."

"Mike, don't say that." I whispered.

"It's true, Tone. I love you." Mike whispered back. That's all it took for me to break. I soon felt tears fall down like my life depended on it. I love Mike so damn much. The more I am with him, the more I really hate all of this. He's making me regret everything. I'm even re-thinking my relationship with Jaime. I can't let this go on.

"I'm k-kinda tired...I'm just gonna knock out, alright?" I asked.

"Okay..."

I took the blanket and pulled it over myself, not turning to look at Mike. I didn't want him to see me cry.

**END FLASHBACK**

Just remembering that, hurt me in a way I just can't find the words to explain.

"What, together?" I asked.

"Yea...I mean, it'd be nice, right?" Mike asked. His smile was slowly fading away. I felt so bad about this. But, I wanna do this. A shower with Mike would be amazing right now.

"Sure. But this is the last thing we do, alright? I gotta go home after." I answered. Mike looked really bummed about it so I shot him a quick smile and kissed his cheek once I got up.

The shower was warm, long, and Mike did all sorts of sweet, sensual things to me in there. I just couldn't do anything to him, the guilt would destroy me if I did.

"Well, I gotta go..." I spoke up. We were currently at the door, saying our goodbye's.

"Yea...see ya, Turtle." Mike smiled, holding the door open. I took a step out and smiled back at him.

"Uh, Tony...?"

"Yea?"

"Thank you for last night. It meant everything to me." Mike spoke.

"No problem, It was fun. Been wanting to do that to you since we were just youngsters." I replied with a laugh. Mike gave me one last hug and I was off to my house.

Notes

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