We're All Crooked Young

As we sat in the restaurant, I could see people staring at us and taking pictures. "Uhrmm guys.. people are staring" I whispered and they both laughed. Ricky looked up from his huge plate of wings and sucked his fingers before talking. "You'll get used to it. It's part of the rock star life Arry. " he mumbled swallowing down another wing. I shook my head and continued to poke at my salad. The thick blue cheese dressing and cucumbers and cheese were mere calories in my mind nothing else. I swallowed the lump in my throat and gripped my stomach. . My eating disorder was going crazy right now as I debated eating the food.
I let my disorder win again and I laid the fork down as I slowly sipped on my glass of water. I could feel Chris' eyes on me but I chose to ignore his stares.
"Arry?" He questioned sounding concerned and I hesitantly met his gaze. We've known each other so long that he can read my my emotions like a book.
I swallowed the lump in my throat and set down the glass and looked at him. "Yes.. Chrissypoo?" I questioned sounding sweet but it came out as a whimper. He pursed his lips and I saw him nudge Ricky to get his attention. I bit my lip nervously. . "Have you been eating Arlet?" He questioned and I cringed at the way he said my name . "I .. uh . Yea" I whispered .. I hated lying especially to them but if they only knew what I do to keep my weight down they'd hate me.
"Don't lie to us" ricky growled lowly pain laced in his voice. "I should go ... " I whispered trying to get up only to have my arm gripped and slowly pulled back down by Chris' long arm . I hung my head low Averting his piercing gaze. "My eating disorder has been worse since we last talked those years ago ... I've ... I'm trying to stay skinny for the agency but I'm so fat I can't seem to lose the weight" I whimpered out and I heard
them shuffle around and I gained courage and I looked up .
Their facial expressions were unreadable and I felt my vision blur tears. I felt tears pass over my cheeks and I bit my lip nervously. "Im sorry ..." I mumbled and I quickly got up and left.
As I pushed past people and ultimately ran through the door I was hit by a hard gush of sunset chill air.
Everything was so beautiful just like I was not. Before I could run more , a pair of strong tattooed arms wrapped around my waist and I broke down in thier hold . "I'm sorry .... I'll be pretty ... I'll be perfect. ..... I'll be petite" I whispered over and over as I cried in Chris' hold . He picked me up and I held on to his shoulders for dear life.
I know he was strong and could pick me up with ease but I felt like I'd break his arms. After my 30 min sobs I passed out. / 2 hours later \

I woke up in Ricky's room. I knew it was due to all the HIM and AFI posters. I slid from out the thick covers and noticed I was just in Ricky's HIM hoodie. I heard voices and I gulped nervously as I inched toward the door and placed my ear to it. "Where is she ?" Oliver questioned sounding concerned. I was about to open the door when Chris yelled. "Why would you care?! She's not even important to you??" Chris screamed his voice booming through the mansion. I heard a long pause then Oliver spoke up. "How the hell do you know , mate?! I'm fucking dating her !" He growled. I cracked the door open and saw them in eachothers faces with ricky In between them.
"You don't even know her ! She's fucking broken and I'm NOT going to let some man slut who fucks anything with a pulse , break her heart " Chris growled staring down at Oliver.
Oliver balled his fist and glared at Chris. "You don't think I know that ?! I'm her fucking boyfriend?! And I'm not a MAN WHORE YOU WANKER!" Oliver spat looking up at him getting in his face. Ricky pushed them apart but they inched closer to each other between ricky. "Oh .. so you know she has an eating disorder ?! Do you know she HATES herself and constantly starves and binges ?! Do YOU KNOW THAT SHE CRIES HERSELF TO SLEEP AND-" Chris screamed millimeters from Oliver's face.
Oliver balled his fist and was about to swing when I burst out the room yelling stop. All of them looked at me shocked. I ran to the front door and slipped on my shoes and quickly hopped in my car ignoring the calls of my name.
I drove to the only person I could think about house. As I reached Cassandra's house I burst in using my key and I looked in the living room to find Austin sitting on the plush creme leather couch with just basketball shorts and a iron Maiden band tank with no sleeves .
He looked from the TV to me and rushed up to me. "Arlet .. are you okay?" He questioned sounding concerned and he held me in his arms. I broke down again and cried loudly into his chest. He guided me back to the couch and he sat me down and he held me in his chest.
"Tell me what's wrong?" He questioned sounding concerned and I hung my head low. "Austin. . You don't need to hear about my shitty life. It's not worth your time. " I confessed trying to get out his hold but he held on to me tighter.
"Hey .. I may be a rock star but I'm a person first. I want to hear about your problems. They're worth my time. " . He cooed softly stroking my hair. "You barely know me ... why would you care?" I questioned and he chuckled. "Well... we all start off as strangers. Might as well get to know eachother now . " he hummed and smiled wide. He made a goofy mistake and I giggled slightly. "See .. I'm already making you laugh. might as well spill your guts . " he cooed laughing and I smiled. I slid up and sat up looking directly at him . I played with the tips of my hair nervously and he looked at me expecting a answer. I huffed and bit my lip nervously , well here goes nothing. "Well uh ... back in elementary school up to high school I was severely bullied. I was one of those nerdy chubby chicks . I was the girl who got excited over a A+ on a math test instead of a party. I wore hand me down clothing from my aunts that reeked of old lollipops and cats.
I had a huge ponytail that made my forehead look six times bigger than it's normal size. I had the 5 inch thick glasses and braces. I was the original nerd but I had the most loving parents .. They always congratulated me on my academic scores and awards and my mom just showered me with so much love.
No matter what the bullies did to me I could always depend on my mom until they died in a car crash when I was 14. After that I was sent to my only living relative that was my fashion model aunt. As soon as I got there I was ridiculed for my entire appearance. She changed my clothes, eating habits and the way I saw myself. Bullies were already giving me shit daily and to top it off , my Aunt was constantly saying how fat and disgusting I look.
She kept saying that I wasn't this or wasn't that. After years of hearing it , I started to hate myself and I developed a eating disorder.
I starved, binged , you name it. As I started to get skinnier , she started to treat me better. She'd let me go to parties with her at 17 years old. I'd drink champagne and mingle with models even superstars at her famous party.
On my 18 birthday she introduced me to a famous modeling agent . From then on I was constantly doing photo shoots and on the cover of magazines. I was having the time of my life. Until I started to gain weight again.
Then I started to get ridiculed by my aunt again. She always said her famous quote that eventually became mine. " I'll be pretty. .. I'll be perfect. .. I'll be petite" .
That's the last thing she said to me on her deathbed when I was 19. Even though she was horrible to me in my childhood , she was the last family I had. I mourned her death greatly and I started to eat heavily to drown my sorrows.
That's when the agency noticed and my manager started to ridicule me like everyone in my life has. She constantly made me feel like shit and my eating disorder started back up again. So here I am .. in a forever downward spiral.." I confessed breathing loudly and I noticed that Austin's mouth was wide open .
Before I could speak he pulled me into a tight hug. Even though it was just a hug it helped. "I want you to know that you're strong as fuck. You're still battling .. no matter how many times your aunt or manager or those dumb ass bullies put you down you kept getting back up. You're still standing. . You're still here. They may have took a lot from you but they can't take away your will to fight for yourself. " he exclaimed with a gleam of rejoice in his eye and I smiled bright. "Thank you Austin. .. I'm so glad you said that. No one has ever been that truthful and honest with me." I whispered and we both smiled before he pulled me into a tight hug and pulling away his strong cologne lingering in my senses. "If I may ask , why are you here ?" I questioned and he chuckled. "Well . Cassie left for a 2 week European modeling tour with the agency tonight. So I'll be checking up on the house.
Just consider me your step in best friend until she returns" he chuckled lightly and I wrapped my arms around his neck and hugged him again.
"Okay , best friend " I cooed encouragingly and he smiled wide. I suddenly felt my phone vibrate in Ricky's jacket and I quickly slid it open. I had 5 texts each from Ricky, Chris and Oliver.
They all told me to come back and they are worried but something inside told me it was a lie. I'm too broken, to fucked up to be missed or worried over.
I locked my phone ignoring all of the texts and I looked back at Austin who was watching a movie I didn't know of. "Hey , is it okay if I stay here tonight? Maybe sleep in the guest room or her room ?" I questioned and he turned to me and smiled. "Sure , it's only like 11 pm though. You sure you don't wanna stay up and be mentally scarred by these morbid horror movies with me ?" He questioned laughing and I giggled at his smooth humor. I thought about it but ultimately my depression won and I politely declined and walked up to Cassandra's room.
As I walked in I was shocked by the sight. She had a gothic all black walled room covered in band posters and Suicide Girls covered in tattoos as posters on her wall. I gasped in awe at how incredibly dark yet colorful it looked.
I slowly dragged my feet to her bed and slid under the thick purple and black satin sheets. I tossed and turned endlessly with the thought of Chris, Ricky and Oliver circling my mind also my depression was just another topping on my shit sundae that made me feel worse.
After a hour of tossing and turning I got up and went down stairs and plopped down on the couch next to Austin. He smirked and turned his head to me. "Couldn't sleep ?" He questioned sounding concerned but still in tune with the movie. I nodded and he patted my head and I giggled as we both watched 'Evil Dead' in a comfortable thick silence. "Yeah , I'm about to be scarred , alright!" I exclaimed as the girl in the movie razor chopped off her own arm in the kitchen. I cringed and Austin laughed loudly. "Yea , we both are " he uttered as the demon girl on the movie popped her head out the basement hatch.

Notes

Here's a update guys ! How do you like this story! I'll be updating all my stories all tomorrow! You should definitely go check out my coauthor story called hatefuck ! My coauthor is amazing★★★♡♡♡♡

RATE, SUBSCRIBE, AND COMMENT!

-CrookedYoung ♡