A Fool's Revenge.

I was curled up in bed, staring at my ceiling at three in the morning. I couldn’t tell you why I was still awake but I was. The negative thoughts had stopped and my mind was just like a blank canvas.

I had no work in the morning because it was my day off and I wasn’t sure what I would be doing… today I guess considering it was the next day already but whatever it would be, I would be tired.

I laid there for a little while longer when suddenly my phone started to ring. I wondered who the hell was up at this time besides my crazy ass. I unplugged my phone and saw Balz name scrawled across my screen.

“Hello?” I said hesitantly. Josh and I were good friends but he has never called me before, let alone at almost four in the morning.

“Hey Jay, sorry if I woke you up but you’re the only one I thought I could call right now.” I could hear a tinge of sadness in his voice and it was so unsettling.

“It’s okay, I was up anyways. What’s up?” I cleared my tired throat and he sighed.

“Can I come over? Is that okay?” he asked quietly with a sigh and I felt so bad for whatever was upsetting him so much.

“Of course, come on over. I’ll make some tea.”

“Alright, I’ll see you in a few minutes.” He said before hanging up and I got out of bed. I pondered all the reasons as to why he would chose me to talk to over his bestfriends, especially this early in the morning, while I fixed the tea.

A few light knocks sounded at the front of my door as I put the tea bags in the two mugs. I carefully walked out with the two piping hot cups and set them on the coffee table before opening the door to a distraught Josh. I let him in, closed and locked my door before walking into the living room with him.

“So, what’s wrong?” I asked pulling my cup up to take a sip and blowing on it before taking in the soothing chamomile and lavender tea. He did the same and he just stared into the cup before speaking.

“Well, it’s about my girlfriend.” He paused and looked at me; I simply nodded for him to continue, tucking my legs under me and listening intently.

“I love her, I really do but she called me earlier and told me she cheated on me! She was wasted and said she just made a huge mistake. This girl is my life next to the band and now I don’t know what to do. I’m pissed off but mostly I’m just hurt. What do I do Jayme?” he looked at me with pleading eyes just searching for the answer. I watched as he gripped onto the mug for dear life and tears poured out of his eyes.

“Well, if you really love her and believe she honestly made a mistake, then forgive her. If you think she didn’t just make a mistake, take a break for a while.” I said calmly and he just shook his head with tears still in his eyes.

“It’s not that simple, well, it is but it’s not. She cheated on me once before under the same drunken circumstances and I forgave her because I know she didn’t mean to do it. This time, I just don’t know. I don’t think she did it on purpose but this is the second time and I just have no clue what to do about it anymore.” He sighed sadly but the tears were finally gone.

“It’s really just keep her or leave her. That’s all I can say to help you. I know that if Mike cheated on me twice we would be done because that shows he’s untrustworthy. It’s different for me and him though verses you and your girl. I know you’ve been with her for a long time so you want to trust her and believe she won’t do it again but she did it again so it’s time to figure out what you’re gonna do.” I sighed and looked at him sadly as he searched for a different answer.

“I guess you’re right. This is the second time that I know of at least and we have been fighting a lot lately. I guess my heart just doesn’t want to accept the fact that she did it again, you know?” I could see him tearing up again and I pulled him into hug and he just let it all out. I have never seen him this emotional in the time I have known him. Josh was the one who barely showed any emotion at all. Yet here he was, bawling his eyes out in my living room. I forgot about my problems because they weren’t so important but this situation got my fucked up wheels turning and thinking about what I would do if Mike cheated on me while he was gone.

“What’s on your mind?” he said as he sat up and faced me while wiping his wet face with a tissue but I just shrugged as the thoughts took over my brain. I shook my head as if it would shake away the ideas flowing into my head but they just faded.

“Come on, I just woke you up at three in the morning, rambled on and racked your brain about my problems and cried my eyes out to you. The least I can do is listen to your problems and not be a persistent fuck like the other guys.” I chuckled a bit at his words and nodded.

“Mike just told me he is going on tour in like a week and a half and I don’t know what I’m gonna do all by myself while he’s gone. He’s leaving for six months. I haven’t been all by myself in almost five months. I know I’ll have you guys for a little while along with the Asking guys whenever they come down but I’m not gonna have someone to hold me at night or calm me down when I’m having a mental breakdown or just to hang out with all day and cuddle and watch stupid kids movies on my days off. Talking to you tonight just makes me worry about if Mike will do something while he’s on tour and just not tell me.” I rambled on and on, saying everything I would miss while he’s gone then finally mumbling my fears.

Josh looked at me like I being ridiculous and shook his head with a slight smirk.

“Jay, of course you’re gonna miss all of those things while he’s gone but he’s gonna come back! As for him potentially cheating on you… I doubt he will. He brags about you every chance he gets. He always says how amazing you are to him even though he knows you can do so much better than him. Yeah, he’s fucked up before but that’s the past. You have to move on from that, he has. When he’s not with you, he’s home. He doesn’t come out with us to clubs or anything anymore since you two got together officially. He’s hung up his player jersey for now. It’s time for the trust test on this one. My girl failed but I think Mike will do just fine.” He smiled and reassured me that all would be fine.

“Just stop overthinking everything. Just let shit happen and live in the now rather than thinking about what could happen in the future.” He said and I rolled my eyes.

“I just get so protective and then feel so, I don’t know, insecure when I’m not with him. Everyone knows we’re together but I’m not gonna be with him to prove that. He may have hung the jersey for now but god only knows what he would do if he’s drunk enough. I guess I’m just gonna have to wait and see.” I sighed and sipped from my now cold tea.


I stayed up just talking with josh about random things and music until we both fell asleep on the couch.


I woke up with a blanket around me and an aching neck. I stretched out and looked around my living room. I was all alone and the house was beyond quiet. I got up and walked into the kitchen to see the coffee already made and a folded up note on the counter by my mug.

Jay, Thanks for being such a great friend and listening to me so early in the morning. I see why
all the guys keep you close to them. You’re amazing and need to stop stressing about stupid shit so much.
P.s – I made you toast too.
: Balzy

I smiled at the small gesture of thanks and put the note into my junk drawer that had all the notes left for me in the mornings that I slept in.



I did nothing all day and lazed around, falling asleep a few times throughout the day from lack of proper sleep. I turned in fairly early to try and catch up on my sleep.

I curled into bed and checked my phone before I got too comfortable. I had a few texts from various people. A few from Mike, some from the other guys and one from Josh thanking me again for listening to him and helping him out.

It felt good to help someone else with their problems rather than them helping me with mine even though that still happened; it was just a two way street this time around.


I replied to everyone, en especially lengthy sweet one to Mike, before crashing like a car into a tree.

Notes

I seriously hate school so damn much. I'm so tired every day but I only have a day less than four weeks of it left so I'm gonna have to deal with it.

Sorry for the lack of posting. Even on the weekends I'm busy or tired and just can't find the ambition or energy to write.

So, Josh/Jay bonding time though! A little surprising or no?

Thanks for reading/commenting/subscribing! <3