Sleeping, With Saints And Apparations

5:32 a.m
I stared at the last box. I finally think I have all my things packed, which really isn’t a lot. It’s only been a couple months since we released Ground Dweller. It’s been a little less than a year since I rejoined the band.

The only thing that remains in this apartment is old stuff Cameron gave me that I haven’t had the heart to ditch; until now. I smiled slyly and began sliding the box out into my car. I never keep much stuff. When I left home, I had all my belongings in one carry on. And now all the stuff I have are things that I kept from recent places.

I needed to plan my next move, literally. I had to find a new place to stay until the tour is over. It’s a tour with Pierce the Veil, and although I have never seen what the band looks like, besides Vic (I never use the internet for obvious reasons), I was excited because Vic’s lyrics just give out so much meaning.

I’m actually excited for this tour, because I haven’t seen my band members in a couple months since the writing process of the album, almost a year ago after my return. I miss them all, but mostly Levi. He’s like my closest mate out of the band.

But you see the thing is, I really like this place, Greensboro, NC. It’s quiet, not much of an over populated place, but I leave whenever someone becomes attached to me, like last week for instant.

My friend, well, person who sells me weed and I hang out with, attached his lips to mine. And in that kiss was lust; lust and love. He became too attached to me and it’s better for his good that I leave, which is what I’m doing. Heaven forbids that I stay here and he sees the crazy side of me. I don’t think I can take another person leaving me.

I always had a plan to go home, but not now, not at least while my parents are alive. Not until I can get over the grieving process a bit. The nightmares still haunt me and I think returning to Australia will only make things worse, and I don’t need anyone’s sympathy.

And with that being said, I shoved the box into my car and slammed it shut. It’s a long drive to my next spot, but it’s all for the better. I pulled out my phone and brought up the little map that has bullet points on all the states I’ve been in. so far, since I’ve been in three states since I’ve turned 23, about a couple months ago. I decided, enough with the East Coast weather. I stared at the map and looked in California.

Am I really ready to move that far? I’m tired of being alone and I’m tired of always having to run, but it’s the only thing I know. I just got to keep going. But, if I’m going to find a place to stay until the tour, I really need to save cash up, which means, find a roommate. The only issue I would have with Cali if the excessive light.

I’m more of a day walker. I enjoy the night more than I do daylight. And it shows. I never come out of my apartment until night, which is how I and Justin (Person who sold me weed) got along. I feel safer in the night, knowing that no one is around to hear our tears or see them. The night is my protection blanket and without it, I’d shit in my pants.
But regardless, Cali is my only hope at the moment.

I exit the app and scroll down my contacts until I land on a familiar name. I just hope he still lives in California.

“Hello?” His groggy voice spoke. It had the tiniest hint of an American accent.

“Hi.” I whisper. Even though we’re 3,000 miles apart, I was already feeling anxious and regretting my decision. I decided to busy myself by tying my surfing board on top of my Jeep.

“Jill? Is, is this really you?” I bite my lip to hold back the tears that wanted to come. To hold back the scream that wants to yell out what’s happened to me. But instead, I nod my head. I quickly throw the rope over the car and run to tie it in a knot.

“Yes. It’s me.” I whisper again. It was quiet. I could hear his breathing, breathing that is getting more ragged by the minute.

“So, you think it’s okay to call me out of nowhere? Was I not going to see you until the tour? I mean, you’ve been gone for a while Amethyst.” I know when he’s calling me by my middle name, he means business.

“I’m sorry.” I whisper.

“Sorry? Are you kidding me Amethyst?! Why are you calling me?! You think it’s okay to drop off the fucking planted? We’re mates you’re my best friend. What the hell is wrong with you?!” I couldn’t help when a sob came out. It hurts so much that I just leave people.

“I’m sorry. I just-I,” I take a deep breath. I don’t need to have an anxiety attack in the middle of my driveway. “I was just tired of being alone. I will never call again. See you on tour-” before I could hang up, I heard a sigh.

“Look Ames, I’m sorry for yelling. You’re my mate and I care about you. So when I don’t hear from you in months, how do you expect me to react? Now what do you really want?” His voice was calmer, but still had that edge in it.

“I wanted to know, do you still stay in Cali?” I asked nervously. If he does, I can stay with him until after tour and then I can make plans to head back outside America. If I stay near him for too long, my past will catch up, and I want nobody in my way.
I finished securing the surf board and leaned against the car.

“Yes, I’m still in Cali.” I sucked a deep breath.

“Can I come stay with you until after tour?” That was a huge step. He may say no and I will have nowhere to go. “It’s just, that, I have to leave where I am and I need somewhere to else to go and since we’re so close to tour-”

“Of course you can come. I may be extremely pissed at you, but you’re my mate.” I sigh, letting out a breath I’ve been holding.

“So, where in Cali do you live at?”

“San Diego.”

Notes

So, decided to step away from my Austin Carlile stories and do something different. Tony fucking Perry.

• The band of this story is called Hands Like Hearts.

• Hands Like Hearts are an Australian band. All members are from Australia.

• Album and songs are coming from the Australian band Hands Like Houses. All credit goes to Hands Like Houses.

• In this story, Sam Bruce is married to Ben Bruce.

• Smut will either be detailed or broad, so...oops.

• And finally, get excited!