Give Me Your Heart And Your Hand

*Aleah's POV, Two Months Later*

Warped Tour had been amazing so far! It was nearing the end of July, and Curse Of Ignorance had released an EP which we were handing out to everyone who came to see us, and we were steadily gaining popularity.

Caught your show earlier today! Loved you guys! @curseofignoranceofficial @coimellybear @lindsayofcoi @bencoistringslammer @littlemissaleahcoi

We got tweets and comments like this all the time, and it was so exciting to see people enjoying the music we poured our souls into.

"Ready to head to our stage?" Ben asked cheerfully.

"Ready!" The girls and I called in response. We walked happily to our stage where we could hear the previous band still performing. Did I mention how often I was forced to interact with PTV? We stood side stage, and I scrolled mindlessly through Twitter as we waited.

tonyturtle: no longer in a relationship… but hey, when something ends, it's just an opportunity to begin something better. maybe even revisit old chapters to your life. stay strong my little turtles.
I resisted the urge to gasp as I read that. What did he mean 'revisit old chapters'?
"Hey guys!" Vic yelled to the crowd as their song ended. "The lyrics to this next song were written by our guitarist Tony, so Ima turn the conversation over to him." Applause.
"So if any of you follow me on Twitter," Applause, "you know that I just broke up with my girlfriend today. Anyway, all I really have to take away from that relationship is this song. I thank you for being such a bitch and inspiring this song!" Applause. "Anyway, this song is basically about when you use someone like a drug to numb the pain of missing someone you love. I really wanna dedicate this song to the girl I can't forget. I know you know who you are. I love you." Applause.
What if I can't forget you?
I'll burn your name into my throat.
I'll be the fire that'll catch you.
What's so good about picking up the pieces?
None of the colors ever light up anymore in this hole.
Nobody prays for the heartless.
Nobody gives another penny for the selfish.
You're learning how to taste what you kill now.
Don't mind me, I'm just reaching for your necklace.
Talking to my mom about this little girl from Texas.
What if I can't forget you?
I'll burn your name into my throat.
I'll be the fire that'll catch you.
What's so good about picking up the pieces?
None of the colors ever light up anymore in this hole.
Just give her back to me.
You know I can't afford the medicine that feeds what I need.
So, baby, what if I can't forget you?
(What if I can't forget you?)
Collide invisible lips like a shadow on the wall,
And just throw, oh no.
You can't just throw me away.
So, what if I can't forget you?
I'll burn your name into my throat.
I'll be the fire that'll catch you.
What's so good about picking up the pieces?
What if I don't even want to?
Oh, oh. Oh, oh. Oh. Oh, oh. Oh, oh, oh. Oh, oh. Oh, oh. Oh.
What if I can't forget you?
I'll burn your name into my throat.
I'll be the fire that'll catch you.
What's so good about picking up the pieces?
None of the colors ever light up anymore in this hole.
Just give her back to me.
You know I can't afford the medicine that feeds what I need.
So, baby, what if I can't forget you?
(What if I can't forget you?)
I'd better learn to live alone.
What's so good about picking up the pieces?
What's so good about? What's so good about?
What's so good about picking up the pieces?Oh.

Throughout the rest of their set, I decided there was no way he was talking about me.

The time flew by and soon enough their set was over and the sweaty boys ran off the stage. Mike and Jaime got congrats kisses and hugs from their girls, and ran off with Vic. Tony approached me and rested a hand on my shoulder while Ben watched protectively. Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed Mike doing the same but with a much stronger glare. "You know who you are," was all he said to me before running away.

I saw Mikey shake his head angrily and stalk off as Ben ran over to me. "Are you okay, Leah?" he asked me. He'd become such a big brother to me and I couldn't have been more grateful.

"Just fine…" I mumbled, still shocked. He nodded in response and we finished setting up. I ran a hand through my freshly-dyed blue, blonde and purple hair before pulling it into a loose ponytail. Before I could think any more about Tony's words, it was time for our set.

"Let's do this!" Ben yelled excitedly, trying to lighten my mood. We all agreed excitedly and ran onto the stage one-by-one. The crowd went nuts, which was amazing! We were steadily gaining an audience, and it was so awesome to hear the screams get gradually louder with each show.

"How are we doing today, Orlando?!" I asked excitedly. Screams. "Well, we have a very special friend in the crowd tonight – where are you Kellin Mother-Fucking Quinn?!" Among the various movements of the crowd, I saw that familiar dork lifted up on the shoulders of two other guys. "There he is!" I pointed. "Can you guys please pass him up my way?!?"

"Well, well, well… if it isn't this little skank." Mel chuckled into her mic from behind the drums. As Kellin finally made his way onto the stage, I hugged him tightly. I had missed so much.

"I love this guy so much!" I laughed into the mic as I pulled Kellin over to it. "Anyways, we have a collab song we wrote about a year ago that we wanna play for you, is that alright, Orlando?!" Applause.

[Kellin:]
"Could you check my pulse for me
To see if I'm alive"

[Both:]
"Cause every time that I am near you
Is the only time I feel alright
If there were any way
I could think to turn back time
I'd stay here with you
Sometimes I sit and wonder"

[Aleah:]
"Sometimes I feel like letting go
All I know is no one should have to be alone"

As I sang this, I caught sight of Nikki side-stage smiling at me. God I loved him. That wasn't all I noticed though – Tony and Mike were standing in the back of the crowd (separated enough that they could see over all the heads, so I guess they weren't technically in the crowd) watching. Mike smiled up at us, but Tony just watched...

[Both:]
"I don't want to be alone
I don't want to die alone
I could fall apart here and now
I don't want to die alone"

[Aleah:]
"I want to be with you, you, you
I only want to be with you, you, you

Tell me what's the point of life
Is it material?
Had everything I could ever want and probably more
When I lay in bed at night
All I do is think of you
So when all this is gone what do I have to come home to?"

[Kellin:]
"This life goes by so fast
Pretty soon I'll grow old
What would I have but some stories now that I have told
No one to share them with
And when it's all done
What am I left with?
Tell me what's left"

[Aleah:]
"I don't want to be alone
I don't want to die alone
I could fall apart here and now
I don't want to die alone"

[Ben:]
"Leave me?
How the fuck you gonna leave me?
When I'm the one that's on TV
With these girls screaming
Outside with my CD
And I'm begging?
Naw baby, you're the one that can't keep me
Leave me?
Girl how the fuck you gonna leave me?
You know I love you, when we fight and we argue
I kiss and I hug you
You push me back, you say that I'm trouble
But every Bonnie got a Clyde with her
Every woman needs somebody that's gonna ride with her
And I can't go on staying alive if I'm alone
Pick up the phone and say hello
I'd rather die with her
Now my night's so cold
When your heart is frozen
Mine's exposed you know this
Try to blame the fame for the way I've changed
And you know those claims are bogus
Baby it's not me, it's us
Maybe now all we need is trust
Maybe this Hennessy will solve our problems
Baby pick it up"

[Kellin:]
"I don't want to be alone
I don't want to die alone
I could fall apart here and now
I don't want to die alone"

[Aleah:]
"I don't want to be alone
I don't want to die alone
I could fall apart here and now
I don't want to die alone

Could you check my pulse for me
To see if I'm alive?"

We hugged Kellin once again and he stage-dived back into the crowd after promising to meet us at our bus later. Soon enough, our set was over and it was honestly the best show we'd ever played. I ran off stage and right into Nikki's welcoming arms. "You did amazing, Baby Doll." I giggled as we hugged. We watched the movie Sucker Punch (my favorite after Star Wars) together the night before, and he told me that I looked just like Baby, so he gave me her nickname.

"Thanks, babe. I'm sorry we didn't get to come see your set." I pouted as I kissed him. I heard the familiarly happy voice of Ash running to Ben to kiss him, and the PTV boys coming back to see their girls.

"You wanna come to my bus and celebrate a great show, beautiful?" Nikki asked me seductively as he kissed my neck. Just as I was about to nod, I noticed Tony and Vic were also there, and pulled away.

"I… I don't think tonight." I muttered. Without another word, I pulled away and started packing up my equipment. The girls and I did what we could, then left the rest to the guys so we didn't drop and damage anything. I noticed Tony watching me closely, and began to feel myself shaking. Nikki watched me with a concerned expression, but I just walked away.

I walked for about ten minutes before finding a large open field. I laid down in the grass and just stared up at the beautiful sky. "You wanna talk?" I heard the voice of my boyfriend after about half an hour. I heard only his voice, but there was at least two other sets of footsteps.

"We were worried about you, ya dumb blonde." Mike chimed in. I smirked a bit, but kept a steady gaze on the clouds.

"I've just been thinking…" I told them vaguely.

"We're here for you, if you want to vent." I looked up, probably with a stupid and shocked look on my face, as I heard Tony's voice. Just as I thought, he was staring there in all his glory, looking down at me with worry.

"Nikki, Mike, can I talk to Tony in private?" From Nikki, I got a very weary look, while Mike stared in worry as if he knew what was happening. Reluctantly, they agreed and left the hill.

"Why do you want to-" I interrupted Tony, as I just couldn't keep my thoughts in any longer.

"What was that song about?" I asked impatiently.

"It was about me using Cara to try and forget you, but it never worked. The 'burn your name into my throat' part meant, like, how it burns when you scream, and I was screaming your name." He explained.

"Is that a metaphor?" I asked confused. He just shook his head.

"I kept calling her Aleah." He smirked at me, telling me exactly what he meant.

"D-does that mean you love me again?" I whispered.

"It means I never stopped." I pulled him into a deep, passionate kiss, then pulled away just in time to see Nikki jogging back up the hill. I knew you still loved him, he mouthed.

Notes