Ashlynn

I sat in a little, secluded bar on the outskirts of town, perched on a metal stool with a beige cushion -discolored, I'm sure- on the seat. It wasn't a high end bar, one where maybe people stopped by to get a drink after a long day at work, or a place to come to every once in awhile where you didn't want a huge outing. There was a pool table set up behind where I sat at the bar, a few bikers in leather jackets grumbling at one another and sharing a few laughs and a beer. The jukebox was playing an old Aerosmith song, one that I knew every word to, even being drunk. There weren't many people here besides myself and the bikers. A few people sat at the bar, mostly males and a couple or two. Though it was one in the morning, a prime hour for a bar, there wasn't much excitement, and for that I was thankful.

After my argument with Delaney, I left with a pit of anger pooling in my stomach and hurt flooding my veins. Leave it to me to begin to run from my problems, yet again. Leave it to me to find a bar within in the first hour of being back home. Leave it to me to screw things up with the people I loved, like always. I was only angry because I knew Delaney was right. I shouldn't have left her like that, without so much as even a call or text. I shouldn't have left everyone like that. It wasn't fair of me to shut out everyone that I loved, especially with no reasoning. But I had done just that, selfishly enough. And I did the last thing on earth that I wanted to do; I hurt people. Realizing that alone was enough to have me back at the bar, drinking my anxieties and mistakes away and banishing them to the back of my skull to resonate and rot.

I didn't think I would ever figure out why I continuously put myself into the situations like the one that was at hand, but I knew that it wasn’t healthy. I knew that I needed to start handling situations better, and with coping skills that didn't involve binge drinking and moving hours away from my family.

I swirled the remainder of the whiskey on the rocks I had left in a glass that I had only ordered just moments before. The ice clinked against the sides of the glass, and I found peace in the sound. I raised the glass to meet my lips as I polished off what was left of the tepid liquid, making a silent vow to myself at that moment, that it would be the last amount of alcohol I would ever consume that was a result of running away from my problems. Content with my decision, I set the empty glass back down on the top of the bar, looking down at the ring of condensation that my glass had made. I dipped my finger into the water, softly tracing shapes in it on the bar.

"Need a refill?" a smooth, male voice sounded to my right, causing me to jump and instinctually look to see where the voice was coming from. When I looked to my right to meet the man that startled me, I was even more shocked by his appearance. The man was heavily tattooed, the pieces of artwork that adorned just about every inch of visible skin were done expertly and to perfection, not one intricate line out of place. The hues blended together effortlessly and complimented a caramel skin tone, obviously of either Italian, Mexican, or Greek descent. His muscle build was prominent, with nice shoulders and notable biceps that showed through the t-shirt he had on, ‘Key Street’ written across it.

I chuckled a bit at my reaction to his voice before trying to formulate a response to him.

“This was going to be my last, actually.” I answered finally, pushing the empty glass across the bar.

“Well I apologize, I didn’t mean to startle you.” He chuckled, taking a seat next to me before sticking out his hand for me to shake. “I’m Tony.” He smiled broadly at me, and with that smile I noticed everything else about him. The way his dark, chocolate eyes were cloaked by thick, full lashes and hidden behind a pair of thick framed, black glasses. His smile caught light of a dermal piercing that rested just below his left eye, attractively placed. His smile was worth a million dollars, the Crest white a scintillating attraction that even dentists would be jealous of. His chuckle was like a song, the sound overwhelming my senses and immediately captivating me. He had dark hair that was kept back by a snapback, but fell to rest right before his shoulders and I noted a long braid that rested on his shoulder. He was incredibly attractive, and he was giving me the time of day. That was enough to make me grin in response and hold out my hand in return.

“I’m Ashlynn.” I smiled broadly, taking in his appearance once more and feeling as though I was in a dream.

“So Ashlynn, what are you doing all alone, drinking at a bar?” he questioned, motioning to where I sat.

“Everyone has their demons. I guess I’m trying to get away from mine for a bit. But I could ask you the same thing, Tony.” I spoke with confidence, any hint of uncertainty and anger suddenly leaving my body and turning me into an outgoing girl that I didn’t know.

“I couldn’t really give you an answer to that question, because I don’t even know myself.” Tony smiled, letting out a soft laugh that succeeded in making me swoon, although I wasn’t sure if that was his intent. In that moment, just like that, I knew that laugh and that smile and those eyes were the only things that mattered.

I couldn’t even form words to respond to him as my thoughts crowded my brain. In my drunken state, I couldn’t help but think sexually towards this man that I had just met. I knew nothing about him, but I knew that there was nothing more that I wanted than to go home with him. I bit down on my lip, thinking about this. I knew that I was thinking irrationally, but even in the short time of being in his presence, my mind was completely off of every problem I had in my life right now.

Tony stared at me for a moment, seemingly trying to figure me out. He opened his mouth to say something, but no words came out. He closed it, and then opened it again before speaking. I could see him trying to form words in his mind, and I thought the struggle was cute.

"Do you want to get out of here?" Tony finally managed, and I could see his nervousness as he said it. With his words, I knew exactly what he meant. The question had underlying meaning, and as much as it wasn't like me to have a one night stand, I couldn't help myself or my thoughts.

I nodded my head silently, accepting his invitation before grabbing my purse and rising from the bar as he did the same.

"I drove my car here, but I can't drive like this," I explained, giggling a little bit at the end of my sentence as I felt the alcohol rush straight to my head once I stood up.

"I'm right there with you," Tony laughed while placing hand on the small of my back and I shivered at the contact of his hand through the thin fabric of my shirt. He guided me towards the front door of the bar, opening the door for me and leading me into the parking lot.

The sky was dark and cloudless, revealing clusters of stars and different constellations that were visible. The only lights outside were street lamps and signs that illuminated various buildings that still remained open at this time of night.

Tony spotted a parked cab in the lot out front and walked up towards it, knocking on the window twice to get the driver's attention and he rolled down the glass barrier.

"Are you in service?" He asked politely, to which the driver nodded in response. “Come on, we can go back to my place.” Tony opened the back seat door for me before motioning for me to get in the car.

“But...my car…” I trailed off, looking back in the parking lot at my Jeep.

“I’ll give you a ride back here in the morning when you wake up.” Tony spoke with a charming smile and I gave in almost immediately. But then I thought about Delaney, and how I’m sure she would be expecting me at some point in the night. Quickly, I made an excuse that allowed me to say I needed to be back early in the morning.

“I have to work in the morning, so I have to be home early. Like by five,” I explained, hoping that Tony would somehow believe me.

“That’s not a problem at all,” Tony spoke reassuringly, and I felt more at ease once I realized that he actually believed my bullshit lie.

I slid into the back seat of the cab without a second thought. I knew that what I was doing wasn’t necessarily rational, or like me at all. But the truth was: I hadn’t been rational or like myself in years. Whether or not I would see Tony again after tonight wasn’t on my mind, because he was making me forget for a while. And I just so happened to like the distraction that wasn’t provided by alcohol. I was thankful for the relief and release, because for once I wasn’t focused on my chronic sadness and discontent with my life. If someone I hardly knew was making that all go away without logical reasoning, I couldn’t help but want to question it, but did just the opposite and trusted myself. I let instinct and impulse control my decisions, fully taking the steering wheel inside my body and navigating for itself. I was so used to questioning everything that came into my life. Why did this happen? Why did that happen? Why am I here? Who put me here? I questioned everything there was to question, and it all burdened my brain the point that it became unbearable. If I found a way to stop those nerves and the worries and anxieties, I told myself that I would fully grasp it. And this is exactly what I was doing with Tony, and I liked the feeling of being at ease. He didn’t make me nervous, like any other guy would. I didn’t shy away from his touch and I certainly didn’t hold back, as if getting in the cab with him wasn’t a sign on its own.

I turned to face Tony, who was sitting in the seat next to me, looking out the window as the car drove down the California streets. The lights that we passed illuminated his face for seconds at a time, and each time I found myself staring. A few minutes into the drive, he looked over and caught my eyes, bringing his lips up to twitch into a smirk that said more than he could in the back of a cab. I felt my palms start to itch, a sure indicator that I was starting to get anxious. Suddenly, I felt so lustful towards this man that I really didn’t even know at all, and all I wanted to do was get him alone. Almost as though he could feel my sudden change of demeanor, he placed his hand on my upper thigh, slowly tracing circles on the fabric of my leggings and inching his way upwards. I felt my breath hitch in my throat, and before I knew what was happening, he was leaning in. He reached out his calloused, tattooed hand to caress my cheek, using his fingers to tilt my chin up and bring my lips to his.

His kiss wasn’t as lustful and eager as I expected it to be, but rather soft and as sweet as sugar. His lips tasted like whiskey, and it made me feel even more drunk, but in the best way imaginable. It made me crave him more. I lifted my arms, snaking them around his neck and entwining my fingers in the ends of his dark hair as I deepened the kiss by grazing his bottom lip with my tongue. He granted me entrance to his mouth, and I explored as I wished. The sexual tension that permeated the air inside of the little cab was thick enough to cut with a knife, and I enjoyed every second of it that I was able to engage in. Our tongues danced, our breathing heavy and fogging the windows, I’m sure. The hand that didn’t rest on my cheek slowly found its way to the hem of my shirt, slowly pushing it up so his hand could travel underneath my shirt to my bare skin. The feeling of his cool fingers on my skin caused goosebumps to rise and I shivered at the touch, sighing heavily into his mouth. He smiled slightly into the kiss, and I tugged at the ends of his thick hair, causing his head to jerk back slightly. While his head tipped back, I took his bottom lip in my teeth and bit down softly, using my grip on his hair to tilt his head back and break the kiss while his lip remained in the grip my teeth had on it. He let out a soft groan, and content with myself, I released his lower lip. I went to move my mouth to reconnect with his, but he pulled back slightly, to which I found myself frowning at.

“This is not about to happen in the back of a cab.” Tony whispered breathlessly, answering my unvoiced question. “And if you did that again,” he motioned to his lip and the back of his head, referring to what I had done just seconds before. “I wouldn’t be able to stop it.” To his response, I nodded in understanding and adjusted myself back into my seat as he did the same himself.

The minutes seemed to creep by as slowly as humanly possible, Tony’s hand still rubbing circles dangerously high up my thigh the entire time to tease me. In the time we spent in the cab, I focused my attention on the street lights whirling by, my liquid stupor slowly fading. Not once did my thoughts drift to the problems I was facing, but rather they stayed put on the man that I was sharing this back seat with at the moment. He was impatiently bouncing his leg, his free hand resting on top of his knee and his fingers drumming a beat on it. To this, I couldn’t help but crack a small smile. I thought the action was cute, but I had no idea why. With anybody else I would simply thought it to be annoying, but I found his anxiousness adorable and incredibly sexy.

It didn’t take long until the car reached a stop in front of an apartment complex. Tony handed the driver the cash to pay for the ride and opened the cab door, holding it open for me so I could scoot out. He shut the door behind me and the cab immediately pulled off the curb, going back in the direction of the traffic so he could get more service.

Tony turned to me and interlocked our eyes, his gaze intent on mine. His chocolate eyes seemed to stare straight past the surface of my emerald ones, looking farther into me than he should for a one night stand with a hungriness I couldn’t begin to fathom. He broke the stare by looking down at my lips, slowly taking a step towards me and reaching one hand up to rest on my neck, and the other to reel me in closer by my lower back, pressing my body up against his. He connected our lips almost instantaneously, and this time I tasted more than alcohol. I tasted want, lust, and temptation as his tongue moved its way into my mouth with ease. He started to walk to the complex door, guiding me backwards by a hand on my hip while his lips were still locked on mine. The eagerness and the fact that he couldn’t keep his hands off of me for long enough to walk to his apartment turned me on, and I couldn’t wait to explore all of the areas and territory I had yet to discover. If any neighbors happened to be awake and looking out their windows, we were certainly giving them a show, but I didn’t have a care in the world. My only thoughts were about his coffee eyes and his soft lips and his tattooed body and how much I wanted them all at the same time.

We made it to the door of the complex and while he fumbled for his keys, I fumbled with his belt buckle. Both of us still somewhat drunk, we had a hard time doing both things and at the same time he found the key and unlocked the door, I threw my head back and laughed out loud at the situation. Tony took the opportunity to connect his lips to my exposed neck as he walked us inside of the complex and to his apartment door. He kissed, sucked, and nibbled on the skin for a moment or so before he found the key to unlock his apartment door, and I savored the feeling of his teeth at the base of my neck.

“Don’t mind the mess, I’m gone a lot of the time and normally just come here to eat and sleep,” Tony said in a hushed, soft tone. His voice was raspy and I couldn’t help but to bite my lip at the sound of his turned-on voice.

“You have no worries,” I smiled up to him as he pushed open the door. I didn’t really look around too much because as soon as the door opened, it closed and we were inside, and Tony’s lips were back on my neck. I kicked off my shoes as he guided me down the hall to a bedroom. He kicked off his own shoes as well as I slid my hands under his shirt, my fingertips grazing his chest up and down, teasing him a bit by stopping just before his waistline. Our lips moved in perfect synchronization, our tongues dancing for dominance as we stepped inside a bedroom and he led me directly to the bed, picking me up by the waist and laying me down on the soft mattress gingerly and with ease.

I liked the fact that Tony was taking his time with me, and not just ripping my clothes off of my body the second he had the chance to do so. Being sensual wasn’t exactly a piece of cake for guys to do, but surely it was easy for a gentleman to do. So as he kissed down my neck and to my collarbone, I enjoyed the fact that he was most likely leaving teeth marks and a trail of hickeys on my neck. I traced down his chest as he hovered over me, stopping at the hem of his shirt and lifting it up. He stopped kissing my neck briefly so he could rise up from my body and allow me to lift his shirt up and off of him completely. I threw it down on the ground and admired the pieces of art on his chest before he leaned back down and met his lips with mine. He kissed me hard and forcefully this time, reaching his hand underneath my shirt and lifting it only halfway up my stomach. He traced up and down my side gently before raising his hand farther up to meet my breast, slowly rubbing it from outside of the black bra that I had on. I clawed at his back, running my fingernails down his spine to explain that I wanted more, and I wanted it now. He removed his hand from under my shirt so I could sit up and he could remove it from my body. While I sat up, I attached my lips to his neck, kissing the wings of the owl that was tattooed there as he unclasped my bra and threw it, along with my shirt, to the floor beneath us. I bit down on the skin, and I received a moan from Tony, who pushed me back down on the bed and connected his lips to the skin on my stomach, trailing kisses down to my hips. He came back up to reconnect our lips as my hands gripped onto his exposed biceps. He reached his hand down to the waistband of my leggings, and tugged them down just a bit.

Before I knew what was happening, he had pushed my lace underwear to the side and slid two fingers into me and I arched my back at the feeling, letting out a soft moan. I wrapped my hand around the back of his neck, pulling his face down so I could kiss him hungrily as his fingers slowly, tauntingly worked inside of me. With one hand I reached down to palm his growing erection from outside of his pants. He stopped kissing me to move his mouth over to the side of my neck, close to my ear as he breathed heavily. I decided to stop teasing him, reaching my hand inside of his unbuckled pants to free his erection, taking the length inside of my hand and pumping it up and down slowly. Tony let out a groan and sat up, yanking my leggings and panties down the rest of the way and tossing them to the side before sliding off his own pants and boxers. Once fully undressed, he hovered back over me, positioning himself at my entrance before pausing.

“Wait, I need a condom,” he went to get off his bed, but I pulled him back down and onto the bed, using this as my opportunity to switch positions and climb on top of him in straddling position.

“I’m on birth control.” I explained while positioning myself over Tony. I lowered myself down onto him, feeling his member fully slide into me. I tipped my head back at the feeling, letting out a soft, “oh my god” before he put his hands on my hips and I started to move up and down. I started off soft and slow, before Tony started to rock his hips to meet mine. Every move I made on top of him, he matched with a thrust to hit deeper inside of me, and pick up the pace a bit. I felt his fingernails dig into my hips as a reaction to the pleasure, and the feeling of the slight pain mixed with how amazing he felt was getting me closer and closer to my weak point.

“I’m getting close,” I explained to him, out of breath and in between moans. He quickened his pace a bit, and just as I was about to reach my climax, he flipped me over and laid me down and positioned himself over me.

“Couldn’t let you have all the fun.” He winked before dipping his hips down and into me, forcing me to call out his name almost immediately. He rocked his hips into me a few times more before I felt my walls tighten and his thrusts get sloppy, and we simultaneously reached our orgasms. Tony collapsed in a breathless, sweaty heap on top of me before pulling out. I stroked his hair softly while we caught our breath.

“I like you,” he whispered with a soft giggle before turning to me and kissing the tip of my nose.

“Are you just saying that because I made you cum?” I laughed heartily, to which he responded with a shake of his head, chuckling all the while. He rolled off of me and laid to rest at my side, his head propped up by his arm that rested on the bed.

“Well, I feel like I would like you if I knew you more. So tell me about yourself.” He smiled while I looked at him.

“What do you want to know?” I asked, pulling a blanket onto me that was laying at the foot of the bed. I wrapped it around most of my body, only leaving a bit of my torso exposed. Tony slid under with me, staying in his position at my side.

“I want to know what your full name is.” He leaned down to place a kiss on my collarbone. “How old you are.” He placed another kiss just above my collar bone. “What you do for a living.” Another kiss, this time at the base of my neck. “What you favorite color is.” A kiss on my jawline. “And what you sing in the shower when no one’s home to listen.” The last kiss was placed on my lips, and I kissed him back while giggling a bit.

“How do I know you don’t ask these corny questions to every girl you pick up at the bar on a Saturday night?” I questioned while he continued to place random kisses on my exposed skin.

“You don’t. But I can tell you for a fact that I am way too lazy for that shit.” He laughed, but I knew he was serious with his response. I liked that about him. He was real about things; he didn’t just beat around the bush, he cut to the chase. Even in only the entire two hours or so that I knew him, I could tell that’s how he was. And I liked that a lot.

“Well I applaud you for being honest.” I grinned at him, turning over onto my side as he laid down flat on his back beside me. I looked down at the tattoos that were etched into his skin. I raised my hand to trace over some of them that I was able to make out the shape of, with the only light being the dim glow of the moon from the curtained window behind us.

“My full name is Ashlynn Adela Hale. I am twenty three years old. I am a data entry operator at a bank. My favorite color is purple. And I thoroughly enjoy singing Blink 182 while in the shower.” I answered all of his silly questions, and I couldn’t help but to mentally laugh at the situation, because of how backwards it was. Normally when you meet someone, you get to know them, THEN you have sex with them. In this case, we had sex, and NOW we’re getting to know each other, and as odd as it sounded, I felt like it would have been uncomfortable the other way around. “What about you, Tony?” I looked up him, only to find him with a smile on his face while he watched me answer his questions while tracing his tattoos.

“What do you want to know?” He mimicked my response while wrapping an arm around my body, reaching his hand up to play with the ends of my long, dark hair.

“I want to know what your full name is, and I want to know how old you are, and I want to know what you do for a living, and I want to know what your favorite color is, and I want to know what you sing in the shower when no one’s home to listen.” I mocked him, trying to imitate his voice but failing miserably, to which he laughed at me for.

He ran his fingers through my hair for a few moments before answering what were technically his questions.

“My full name is Antonio Nighthawk Perry. I am twenty seven years old. I am a guitarist in a band. My favorite color is either green or black, I can’t decide. And I’m a pretty big Belieber, so I would have to say all of his songs. Swaggie,” he answered with a completely serious face the entire time, and I probably found the fact that he could do that more hysterical than his answers.

“Okay, Nighthawk? What the hell?” I managed through a fit of laughter. “And you like the Biebz, huh?”

Tony shrugged, cracking a smile. “Your laugh is funnier than my jokes.”

“Hey! Take that back!” I giggled, playfully smacking his bare chest and he laughed in response before tightening his arm that was around me to bring me closer to his chest.

“Fine, I’m sorry. I think your laugh is cute,” He spoke as he kissed the top of my head. “But I don’t have a middle name, so I gave one to myself when I was a little kid. And yes I like the Biebz, don’t hate.”

“I would never hate on the Biebz, Nighthawk.” I joked and he just shook his head while laughing with me.

“So a data entry operator at a bank, huh? What is that like?” When he spoke of my job, I was suddenly thankful that my head was resting on his chest so he couldn’t see my face fall as he asked the question.

“Uh, it’s okay.” I shrugged, not saying too much about it.

“Just okay? Don’t you make decent money doing that, don’t you like it?” He pushed and I suddenly felt myself getting short tempered when I knew I shouldn’t. But I couldn’t help it at this point; what had happened had made me never want to speak of my job where I used to live ever again. And I wasn’t going to dig up the past now, because it was over and done with. It was resolved….right?

I felt my body tensing and I knew that I had to dodge the subject otherwise I would break down. And I certainly didn’t want to do that here in front of Tony, who I hardly even knew.

“I said it was okay.” I snapped, and I felt Tony’s hand stop stroking my hair. I felt bad for being short with him, but there was no other way to avoid the topic. I felt a lump forming deep in my throat, and suddenly there was a pit in my stomach again and I wanted nothing more than to just drown my problems in alcohol once more. I mentally scolded myself for thinking that way after what I had promised myself just hours before, but it was my initial reaction to stress. It was almost second nature to me.

“Okay, I’m sorry I asked.” Tony’s voice deepened as he tried to hold back annoyance in his tone. He returned to stroking my hair, and I let my body relax again, trying to explain to myself that he didn’t know, that nobody knew, and that it wasn’t his fault.

I nuzzled my head into his chest and sighed softly, running my fingers up and down his chest gently, hoping that the soft touch would lull him to sleep so he wouldn’t continue the subject of my workplace.

A few minutes passed by and I realized that once his breathing got deeper and that his playing with my hair ceased, that he must have fallen asleep. I was thankful that he slipped into sleep before the conversation could further.

I laid there a few minutes before I realized that with as much that was on my mind, there wasn’t going to be any sleep for me tonight. My thoughts raced back and forth to my work situation, to what had happened with Delaney a few hours prior and I got upset all over again, tears beginning to sting the corners of my eyes.

Delaney didn’t deserve this. I was lucky that she was even allowing me to come back and stay with her after all this time apart from her without a word. I had neglected her, and she didn’t deserve the harsh treatment, not even in the slightest. She was family, after all. I loved her with all my heart and I knew that even with things as hard as they had been, that I should’ve kept in touch with her. I knew she would’ve understood and tried to help me through the bind that I was in. Hell, maybe if I had kept in touch instead of running away from my problems, I wouldn’t have even been in the situation that I was in.

I really had brought this all on myself, and I needed to do as best as physically possible to try and mend the ties that I had severed when I left. I needed to make a peace offering, to clear the air and settle the disputes that I had created with Delaney, and then maybe I could work on bettering myself as a result. I needed as much support and
acceptance as I could possibly receive, and I knew that if I tried my hardest and I apologized sincerely to Delaney that she would welcome me back with open arms. Or so I hoped. Delaney was always the type of person to put others before herself, even when we were young. She gives, but receives little. And she doesn’t give herself nearly as much credit as she should for just how kind and generous of a person that she is. I wasn’t going to take advantage of that. I wouldn’t even begin to let it happen, because I had done it once before when I left. I needed to apologize, and that’s exactly what I would do when I got home.

I glanced around the room, trying to focus on other things apart from my vices and evildoings. I looked at the walls of the unfamiliar, foreign bedroom. They looked to be painted a beige color, with a few random posters and pictures hung up around the room sporadically. There seemed to be a few other boys apart from Tony in some of the pictures that I saw. I couldn’t see much though, seeing as I was laying down and the moon was still the only thing glowing in the sky. A few guitars were also in little stands that were hung up on the walls. I remembered Tony saying that he played guitar in a band when I had mockingly asked him what he did for a living. Maybe his bandmates were the ones in the pictures with him. I shrugged it off, my eyes wandering around the room a bit more. A few duffel bags littered the carpeting, along with a few articles of clothing and various amps and foot pedals. It seemed as though he really wasn’t home much, just as he had told me before we entered the apartment.

I sighed, running out of things to look at in the bare room before deciding to focus my attention on Tony’s breathing. His breaths were deep and far apart, and I couldn’t help but to wonder how many other girls he had done this with. Surely, I couldn’t have been the first. And he said he was in a band, so I can only imagine how many other times this had occurred. I tried my best not to think such things, because I was the one in his bed now, and that’s all that mattered at the moment. After all, it was only a one night stand.

I laid there in bed for what seemed like years before deciding to look over to the clock that rested on his bedside table. The thick, bright red and boxy letters read that it was half past four. If I wanted to make it home, or “work” as I had lied, by five o’clock, I figured that I needed to wake him up.

I sat up only a little bit, being careful not to disturb him. He didn’t stir and his breathing didn’t change, so I figured I was okay to find my clothes and get dressed. I untangled myself from his embrace and slid out of the bed slowly. He moved his arm, tossing it across his body before rolling over and burying his face into the pillow, and I had to stifle a laugh at how adorable the sight was. I looked around the room, trying to find all of my clothes and silently cursing him for throwing them all around the room. I would have to tell him to just nicely place them on the ground next time.

I stood up straight immediately as I thought about this. Next time? What the hell was I talking about? I shook my head, chasing the thought away. I collected all of my clothes after a solid five minutes of searching and put them on before slowly walking over to Tony’s side of the bed. He had rolled onto his side now, his cheek smushed against the side of the pillow and his lips slightly parted open. I almost didn’t want to wake him up, his sleeping, shirtless form almost too precious to disturb. But he stirred a bit and his deep brown orbs slowly fluttered open.

“Ash?” he questioned, the shortened version of my name startling me. No one calls me that, except of course Delaney and my other family members. I couldn’t help but to smile softly at this. “What are you doing?” His voice sounded raspy and thickly laden with sleep.

“Tony, I have to go to work. You said you’d drive me in the morning to get my car,” I explained, trying to get him to wake up a bit more and remember.

“Oh, yeah,” he spoke in the same raspy tone before sitting up a bit in bed and looking over to the clock and reading the time. “Shit, you gonna be late?” he asked while pulling off the blankets and sitting at the edge of the bed, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

“No, I’ll be fine,” I assured him before picking up my purse from the ground and leaving the room to get my shoes so he could get dressed.

I slipped into the hallway outside of his bedroom, unzipping my purse and pulling out my phone to check to see if I had any notifications, missed calls, or text messages. I saw that I had a text from Eli, and as quick as I unlocked my phone, I locked it again and shoved it back into my purse.

“Ready to go?” I heard Tony’s voice behind me. I turned around to see him fully clothed in his doorway, his car keys in hand and a sleepy look still adorning his features.

“Yeah.” I smiled softly and began to walk down the hall towards the front door and out of his apartment complex. We walked into the parking lot in silence, and I felt as though it was slightly awkward. He pointed at a caramel colored SUV that was parked and we slowly made our way towards it. Once we reached it, Tony unlocked it and walked to my side to open my door for me, giving me a sweet kiss on the cheek as he did so. I smiled graciously, but couldn’t help but to feel as though his actions were a bit forced. I sighed as he closed the door behind me, waiting for him to make his way around the car. I was thankful that the awkwardness would only have to last a bit longer, the ride to the bar not too lengthy of a drive.

We drove in silence, the only background noise being a CD I didn’t recognize that was playing.

I thought back to last night and I didn’t regret my actions; not one bit. What I had done with Tony was something that was fun for the both of us, and he managed to keep my thoughts off of things for a substantial amount of time before they were practically forced to come back. It was a one night stand, and that was really the only way I could classify it.

We reached the bar and he parked his car in the space next to where my Jeep was.

“Thank you.” I spoke quietly, not wanting to sound awkward but failing miserably.

“You’re welcome. Uh, I had fun last night.” Tony spoke almost as quietly as I had, and I could tell that he felt awkward as well.

“Me too.” I nodded and smiled. He returned the smile and paused for a moment. I saw him furrow his brows a bit, seemingly thinking of what he should do next. He made up his mind quickly, and he leaned over and placed a soft, gentle kiss on my lips that I returned easily. Even if things were awkward, we still had sex. If we could have sex without it being awkward, we should be able to share a goodbye kiss without it being awkward.

He pulled away and as he did, I thought back to what I was thinking when I was gathering my clothes in his room. Next time. The words echoed in my brain and I tried to quickly think of what to do next. I thought of maybe asking him to do something later tonight, but I eliminated that option faster than it even became one. I was wracking my brain for a simple solution, and just as I was about to open my mouth to just give him my number, his phone started ringing from inside his pocket. He slid it out, looking at the screen.

“Were you going to say something? This can wait.” He motioned to his phone, and I just waved my hand to indicate that it wasn’t important.

I mouthed a goodbye that he returned with a smile before he answered his phone, and I opened the car door. I got out of the SUV and made my way towards my car, hearing Tony’s muffled voice from inside his car while it began to back out of the parking space. I got in my car and put the key in the ignition, the engine roaring to life and music beginning to play from my stereo. I watched as Tony’s car pulled out of the bar parking lot and back onto the main road, and I silently played over all of last night’s events. Suddenly, I hated myself for what I had done. Not who I had done it with, just the fact that I wanted to get away from reality for a little bit and forget my problems. Essentially, I was doing what I had promised myself I wouldn’t do again, only in a different way than before. And in that moment, I wondered how the fuck I was ever going to begin to fix things in my life when I couldn’t even manage to fix myself.

Notes

Here's another chapter for this brand-spanking-new story that we have started! (: I hope you guys enjoy this, there's so much more to come! Things will start to get very interesting soon. Let's just say it's a very elaborate plot line (; hehehe.

Comment and let us know what to think! We would love to hear your take on this!

- Jolee