I've always had a shitty immune system. It had never been much of a problem in my adult life; I took pills to maintain mineral efficiencies and I hardly second-guessed my general health. But when I was little I was always getting sick. If I fell and scraped my knee, it would nine times out of ten get infected to some degree. I hadn't really thought of this in a while though. It wasn't a relevant part of my life—thousands of people had crappy immune systems these days, anyway. That was just how things were. It never concerned me. Until now. The horrible pain in my head triggered it all to spark back up in my memory.

If I didn't have human interaction every five minutes, I bursted into fits of tears. It was scary, being so alone in the dark. I had always been afraid of the dark and the monsters that came with it.

"Aunt Livy," I whined. I knew I was getting on her nerves but my head hurt and I needed her help.

"What is it now, Faye?" She asked with a sigh. Aunt Livy wasn't like how Aunt Livy used to be. I didn't know if she smiled or not anymore but by the sound of her voice I figured that she didn't. She sounded angry. Angry with me, especially.

"My head really really hurts," I sniffled.

"I know sweetie but it's going to have to be like that for a little while longer," she said.

"But how much longer?" I cried.

"I don't know, Faye. Why don't you go take a nap and tell me how you feel when you wake up?" She suggested gently. I sniffled again and nodded. I reached my hand out and Aunt Livy gently held it, leading me somewhere—the couch. I hadn't learned where everything was yet.

I screeched when I woke up. "Owwwwww owie, ow, ow ow ow," I yelled, crying hard. The crying made it hurt even worse. Aunt Livy was near me in an instant. For the first time in a while, she sounded genuinely concerned about me. I was no longer the little girl who cried wolf. This time the wolf was really here and he was biting my head off.

"Aunt Livvy, OW," I shouted. The headache hurt so much and it reminded me of the plane crash. This only made me cry more—and also feel more pain.

She scooped me up into her arms while talking to someone. It hurt so bad.

She took me to my doctor. He said that my injuries were infected and that I had developed a lot of bruises inside of my head, which pressed on a part behind my eyes that made headaches happen. I begged them to make it stop. Somehow they did because my arms and legs went fuzzy and I could no longer feel anything at all.

When I woke up, my arms and legs were fuzzy. I couldn't feel anything at all in particular.

"What was that, Faye?" I heard someone ask. I turned my head, seeing Mike. I smiled weakly, happy that I could see him.

"Hm?"

"You just mumbled something. Don't worry about it," he said.

"Aunt Livy," I mumbled again. Tears started to bubble up in my eyes.

"Hey hey hey, don't think about that, Faye. Remember if that hadn't of happened, you would have never met Phoebe in foster care and you might not be here today. Remember that we love you," he cooed. He held his palm on my cheek gently.

"Okay. I love you guys too. You're right," I agreed. "It's an infection and bruising, isn't it?" Mike nodded slowly. "Why does this have to happen? I was happy." I started to cry softly.

"It's okay babe, they'll get it sorted, don't worry," he soothed.

"What if—"

He hushed me gently. "We'll deal with whatever happens, love. Now tell me, how are you feeling?"

"Erm..." I assessed myself carefully. My legs were fine, my arms were fine. None of my bones were broken. I wasn't waking up from a plane crash… I could be a lot worse. "My head is numb," I reported. He nodded and leaned over, kissing my cheek.

“They gave you medicine to make the swelling go down, so you might feel like that for a little while,” he said.

“Like fuzz,” I murmured. He smiled. I loved Mike’s smile. It was so bright and it made my heart beat faster but in a good way. I looked at his eyes. They seemed a little sad again, and when he smiled his eyes didn’t brighten up like they usually did. That was one of my favorite parts about him, but I also loved a lot about him so I wasn’t one hundred percent.

“What’re you thinkin’ about?” he asked quietly. I smiled.

“How much I love you,” I said. I turned my head into my pillow a little bashfully.

He chuckled and smiled again, this time his eyes brightening up. I grinned excitedly and reached my arm out for his face. I curled my slightly shaking fingers around his cheek and then slid my palm to the back of his neck, pulling his face to my level. I placed a chaste kiss on his lips and smiled again.

“Well I love you a shit ton, too,” he said, kissing me back. I closed my eyes, savoring him. Then, though, my eyes shot open. “What’s wrong?” He asked, a little alarmed.

“Mike, am I going to go blind again?” I cried. I looked him dead in the eyes, widely and terrified. I couldn’t go dark again. I didn’t know what I would do if I did.

He gently smoothed his thumb over my cheek. “Shh, shh, it’s okay Faye. I don’t think you have to worry about that,” he eased.

I breathed heavily. “Really?”

He nodded. I believed him because why would he lie about that? “Your Doctor said you should be fine—”

“Should be,” I cut in. He shook his head.

“You just have to lay low for a while, and have more frequent check ups. You have to heal completely.”

“Oh,” I said. “I thought I was doing an okay job—”

“You’ve got a sensitive lil’ noggin there, sweetheart,” he reminded me.

“So…” I frowned. I sniffled a little. “No tour then,” I muttered sadly.

He nodded. “I’d rather you be completely healthy though then on our nasty bus catching all sorts of germs,” he said, running his fingers through my hair gently. I pouted a little but knew it was for the better. We’d get there eventually, I hoped.

Mike looked like he was about to say something else, but then the door to my hospital room opened. I smiled widely at Phoebe as she walked in. She sat on the other side of me, across from Mike.

“Hey,” I said coolly.

“How’re you feeling?” she asked, petting my arm gently.

“I’m fine,” I said. She smiled back, her eyes reassuring. I imagined that her eyes have always looked like that to me, even when I couldn’t see them.

I didn’t really understand what was going on. Aunt Livy tried to set me down and talk to me, but I couldn’t keep myself together every time she emphasized that she was leaving. How was I supposed to? She had to go and I wasn’t allowed to go with her. I had complete strangers talk to me, explaining that Aunt Livy wasn’t fit to be my guardian, telling me that they were putting me in a nice house that would take care of me properly. They said I would have brothers and sisters. I said I didn’t want brothers and sisters. I wanted my parents. I was an only child. It wouldn’t be the same!

I started to have really bad anxiety attacks. Everything was too much to handle. I was so alone, so in the dark. I didn’t know how to calm myself down and I didn’t trust anyone enough to get close to help me calm down. I was just a little girl, lost and confused, abandoned and in pain.

My first friend at the foster house was Phoebe. I was wary of her at first. I was wary of everyone. She was about my age though so that made me feel better. I was sick of having adult’s handle me all of the time. I hated adults. I hated Aunt Livy for leaving me when she told me she wouldn’t.

Phoebe said her parents left her too, because they did too many bad things and they weren’t fit to be her guardian. She was nine when it happened. She has lived in this house for three years. “Aunt Livy wasn’t fit either,” I told her quietly. We became friends because we had to share a room so we talked a lot. I liked her. Phoebe helped me around and I even let her hold my hand. I wouldn’t talk to anyone else but her, barely even the adults that ran the foster house. I had an aide lady but soon Phoebe took her place, unofficially of course. She was the only one I felt comfortable around. Her eyes were reassuring even though I couldn’t see them.

“Hey, don’t cry Faye,” Phoebe said. She leaned over and dabbed my cheeks.

“I’m sorry, I’m just really happy I have you,” I said to her.

Phoebe chuckled. “Where’d that come from?” I shrugged my shoulders.

“I'm not mad at Aunt Livy anymore. I have you guys,” I said. The medicine in my system was getting to my head. I felt loopy and a little too happy. I still hated Aunt Livy. But I was okay. I had Phoebe. I had Mike. I had everyone. I was okay.

I blinked slowly. When my eyes opened fully, I realized I had fallen asleep again. “You good?” Phoebes asked. I nodded.

I looked around the room. I could see the moon through the window. I yawned. “When can I leave?”

“Tomorrow morning,” she said with an easy smile. “They just want to hold you over night.”

I nodded. “Okay,” I said sleepily. “You guys don’t have to stay here, if that’s even allowed,” I said. I felt bad, glancing at Mike. I was sure that all he wanted right now was his comfortable bed at home after such a long tour and having to sleep in cramped bunks.

“Don’t be silly, Faye. I’d rather be with you than alone in my bed,” Mike said, patting my elbow. I blushed a little and smiled at him.

I turned and looked at Phoebe. “If Mike’s going to stay you don’t have to, also,” I said. “Of course I love your company but don’t feel bad if you want to go back—”

Phoebe chuckled. “You’re so cute,” she said. “I’m going to go back with Vic. I know you’ll be okay here with Mike. I’ll see ya in the morning, okay?” she walked over to me and kissed my forehead.

“Okay, Phoebe. I love you,” I said.

“Love you too, babe. Goodnight guys,” she said, waving to Mike. I saw Vic poking his head into the room, smiling brightly and waving at us.

“Feel better Faye! See ya tomorrow,” he grinned and then disappeared.

“I love them,” I said with a small sigh. Mike chuckled.

“You’re really spreading the love today, aren’t you?”

I nodded and grinned. I didn't know why I was, but I also didn’t think I needed an explanation.

The nurse soon came in to check on me for the night. When she left and I was all settled, I carefully moved myself over in the bed. I patted the small space next to me.

Mike gently laid down. He held one of my hands and then reached across my face to hold his palm on my cheek. “How are you feeling?” he asked softly.

“I’m okay,” I said honestly. “Somehow still tired,” I added, feeling my eyes weigh down a little. “I slept the day away.”

“That’s okay. It’s understandable.” He dropped his hand from my face but kept his arm draped across me. His fingers dangled in the space above my shoulder and occasionally, mindlessly, brushed across my face and twirled in my hair. I smiled gently and turned my head to look at him more directly.

“Sorry for being so eventful all the time,” I said sheepishly. There was always something going on with me—with us.

“No saying the S-word,” he said, kissing my cheek. “I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t want to be. You’re my girl, I don’t care whatever happens, I’m here for you, okay?” I nodded.

“Thanks, Mikey,” I murmured. I didn’t know how to show him that I was there for him just the same. I didn’t want to just say it. Mike says it but he shows it, too. I wanted to give that right back to him, but I didn’t know how. So I didn’t say anything else.

Mike chuckled a little and leaned forward, kissing my forehead. “Oh, starry eyes,” he started. But I was afraid my eyes felt more fragile than that. Like stained glass. “Get some sleep. I love you.”

Notes

I think Mike adn Faye are my favorite relationship I've ever written. (besides the Tony/Tori relationship from my collab story screams of silence with my bae @precious_preciado that you should all read hehe)
anways. yay an update. almost done with my freshman year of college omfg so i'll have a nice long summer to write for myself and for you lovely people. let me know what you think. much love. xoxo.