“Bree,” I whispered. It was interesting, the way sound travels after an intense shock. It was like everything was in slow motion, so when my phone and keys slipped from my fingers they crackled and clanked onto the floor, everlastingly ringing in my ears. And when her name left my lips, it wisped out and dissolved into the thick atmosphere around us.

“Hi, Vic,” she repeated softly.

“What-what are you… what are you doing here?” I shook my head, trying to get my bearings straight, trying to determine if this was really real. I had been so used to her absence that I assumed she was happy where she was. It didn’t even hurt any more, her not being here. I was in a different stage of my life, and unfortunately that stage did not include her. So when I suddenly saw her, everything just completely stopped inside of me. It was almost painful.

“I… I… I am better,” she said quietly, looking down at the ground as if she knew she shouldn’t have said that, like she knew right as the words left her mouth that they were not only wrong, but also selfish. How could she say that to me right now?

“Where did you go?” I asked, unable to mask the hurt in my voice.

She sighed. “My… my parents,” she mumbled.

Betrayed. That was how I felt.

Bree betrayed me to heal with the very people who betrayed her.

That was a kind of hurt that I couldn’t even put into words.

I couldn’t even speak; I just stared at her incredulously.

“I’m s—”

“Don’t you dare,” I snapped. “Don’t you dare say that you are sorry, because I won’t be able to believe you. Everything you have ever said to me was a lie,” I accused. “Don’t you dare,” I added again with a hiss.

“Vic, you don’t understand—”

“I don’t understand? Jesus, Bree. I’ve lost a brother, too, y’know. I knew the pain you felt. Hell, I felt it with you,” I spat. Bree flinched at my tone, but I couldn’t find it within me to feel sorry for her.

“I knew you were having a hard time, Bree, but I was never going to leave you,” I said, my voice as strong as I could muster. “You led me to believe that you were going to try. You led me to believe that you were going to be okay and that you were going to stay. You led me to believe that you actually loved me, and then you left me. You left. You abandoned me when I was hurting, too. I know I don’t own all of the pain, but neither do you. And I was sad about Logan dying, too. You led me to believe that we were going to get through it together. You led me on and then you left me. That’s exactly what happened,” I said, trying to control the anger in my tone. “I got better for you. It was all for you, don’t you get it? I tried so hard to take care of you, but you wouldn’t let me. And you lied to me, Bree. I remember what you said perfectly. You told me exactly that I was the one thing tying you down to reality. You literally told me that you were going to get through the loss of Logan for me. You promised that you would never leave. But I call all of that bullshit. Bullshit,” I articulated.

“I-I don’t know what to say,” she whispered.

“You don’t have to say anything, Bree, because I know. Everything you said were lies through your teeth. You only said all of those things just to make me feel better. You only said those things because you knew you were going to leave me in the end, didn’t you?” Bree averted her eyes. That hurt, because that meant that I was right. “Unbelievable,” I hissed.

“I meant what I said in the letter,” she whispered.

This time, I was the one who flinched. “That removes no pain,” I said lowly. “I’m sorry that you needed to get away Bree. I’m truly sorry that you weren’t feeling well enough to be around me. I wish that you had let me help you, or at least talked to me about how you really felt in person. I’m sorry about what happened, but I’m not sorry for this… Bree, I love you, I always have and I always will. But I can’t… I can’t,” I shook my head.

“I understand,” she whispered. “I knew that would happen. I scarred our relationship so badly…” her voice trailed off.

“That it isn’t the same anymore,” I finished in a tiny whisper.

She nodded sadly, her face twitching in sadness. We both took a step closer to each other, and, without much consideration, I took her in my arms. She cried softly, and I rubbed her back, trying my best to sooth her. Was she really “better”?

Who would have thought that it would be me consoling her, and not the other way around?

“Please don’t cry, baby,” I said, rocking her a little. I closed my eyes, a tear slipping down my face. After I was done getting everything I needed to say to her out, the pain smacked me in the face. It hurt so much. It hurt so fucking much, but I needed to keep it in. I hated how much things changed. I hated the memories of how things used to be, when Bree was my everything. The sad part was that that time in my life wasn’t even that long ago. It was behind me, but barely; if I turned around and reached out, I could almost grab it. But, that was the thing: Almost. Never again would I have it in my grasp securely; never again would things be the same.

I felt her nod against my chest, and I sighed. I pulled away from her and stared into her beautiful hazel eyes that I couldn’t deny I missed.

“Bree,” I murmured softly. “Bree, I love you,” I said softly.

She nodded. “I love you, too,” she gulped.

“But…” my voice trailed off.

“I know,” she nodded.

“I understand, though,” I said, my shaking hand reaching up to tuck some of her hair out of her face. “I understand why you left. You’re so special to me, Bree. I don’t want to lose you, but we can’t…” I shook my head. “It just won’t work anymore. We'll only hurt each other,” I continued. I had to keep saying it, just so it would make sense in my head. She nodded. I pulled her into another hug. I buried my face into the crook of her neck as a fresh tear escaped my eyes. It was a different kind of tear. This tear held all of my sadness and despair, my past and present grievances, and my conflicting thoughts and indecisiveness. It fell slowly, relieving me of everything and dripping onto her shoulder.

“You’re so amazing, Vic. I’m so proud of you. Look at how strong you’ve become,” she said. Her head turned and then I felt her kiss the side of my head. I smiled softly, and then I retreated from the hug. The tear that held everything remained on her shoulder, and I consciously dabbed it away, drying the skin it had fell on. I didn’t want those feelings of mine on her shoulder; she already had enough to deal with; she didn’t need to carry the burdens of what could have been.

I cupped her cheek in my hand and stared at her. I didn’t understand what was coming over me, but I just needed to taste her lips one last time, even after our conversation. I leaned forward only with slight hesitation until I saw her leaning forward, too, and then our lips carefully met each other’s, for old time’s sake. The familiar spark was missing, though, and I found half of me disappointed and the other half of me relieved.

After a few moments of our lips being pressed together, I pulled away, half of me reluctant and the other half glad that I had some self control.

Bree stood before me. Half of me knew that Bree was my drug—an unhealthy one. One that could possibly kill me if I got too sucked in again. But the other half of me saw how sad and beautiful she was, how innocent she looked in this moment…

“Oh,” I heard. I quickly turned around to face the source of the shocked voice, one single tiny word holding so much evident pain and confusion. Alyssa; fuck!

“Shit,” I muttered when I only caught a glimpse of her hair swinging around as she left the apartment as quickly as she came.

I stood, frozen, my hands still holding Bree’s elbows delicately. I turned back to Bree, her mouth agape and her eyes sad.

“B-Bree, I have to go,” I whispered. Alyssa saw. I couldn’t believe that I had forgotten about her for one moment, knowing in the back of my mind that she was right downstairs. I needed to make sure she was okay. I had to run to her and talk to her, but I found my feet shaking with anxiousness. I ran my fingers through Bree’s hair one last time. I needed more time. “This isn’t goodbye,” I declared, and she nodded with a small smile. I couldn’t let her go that easily—Bree was too important to me to not have in my life. But things had to be different between us. But, I also realized that I didn’t have time to elaborate or conflict over the terms of our relationship.

I couldn’t resist her lips one more time, though—I knew that for sure. How stupid of me? I leaned forward and they connected softly. They simply touched, not smacking together. I felt a tear hit my lips that seemed to mold perfectly with hers, and my heart broke further as I realized that it wasn’t my own tear. But, the gentle kiss was all I needed, and I knew exactly what I needed to do. After seeing Alyssa for one split second, reminding me of everything she also was to me, and after kissing Bree one last time, I had made up my mind. It was so easy, too. So painfully easy.

“Thank you,” she whispered. My bottom lip quivered, but I refused to let another tear fall. I extended my arm and lovingly stroked her cheek.

She smiled softly and turned her head into my hand. I only had seconds left to act, but my feet remained like stone. I knew I was having a difficult time letting her go, but then in my head I saw the dark brown hair whipping around, as she ran away.

For the first time in a while, I was looking at Bree, and she looked happy. She had life in her eyes, and her cheeks were full. She looked healthy, much like I did. We were both okay, now. We didn’t need each other anymore. “I hope it was worth it, Bree,” I whispered, and I wasn’t sure if she heard or not. She nodded, telling me that it was, and I was glad. I would rather her be okay and healthy without me than miserable and depressed with me. I smiled, and she returned it. “Everything’s going to be okay, finally,” I said. She nodded, and I decided this was how I wanted to remember her.

Without another word, I turned around quickly and headed to the door.

This time, it was me who was the one that was leaving. But, just like what I imagined Bree had figured, I knew she’d be okay without me. Similar to what she said in her letter, I could see it in her eyes.

I hastily swung open the door, and, even though I was rushing, it felt like I was moving in slow motion as I ran down the two flights of stairs. I ran straight through the small lobby and busted through the door, squeezing past an alarmed looking man in the process. I sprinted to the parking lot, seeing that the car was gone. I growled angrily, gripping my hair in my hands.

I had taken too long! Even though my decision was instant, I had taken too long saying goodbye, and Alyssa had no idea.

Worry spread through me like a wildfire, burning in my veins. Without really thinking about the distance, I broke off into a sprint. I didn’t think I was even breathing, but somehow I was able to continue my fast pace. There was something about really caring about someone that can really keep your adrenaline going. And that was exactly what was happening to me; even though it was several miles away, I ran and ran. Time went fast, but also painfully slow. I only hoped that Alyssa wasn’t going to do something stupid before I had a chance to get to her.

It must have been forty-five minutes, but I didn’t let up. My legs rattled, my heart throbbed, my lungs burned, and my head pounded, but I didn’t really pay any mind to the pain. I was afraid that the forty-five minutes it took to get back to the Perry’s household didn’t make me too late. I didn’t want her to think that I had lingered for that long; I didn’t want her to think that I was about to hurt her.

Time was fast to the one running, but slow to the one waiting.

I continued my sprint into her house, taking only two strides to climb the entire set of stairs. I busted into her room, my mind only flickering with what I was afraid I would see for a split second until I spotted her, sitting solemnly at the edge of her bed, her head down and her hands in her lap.

“Lissy,” I said as I exhaled roughly.

Her head shot up in alarm, staring at me in confusion and surprise.

“Are you hurt?” I asked first, looking at her arms that sat in her lap. She shook her head.

“I wouldn’t do that to you,” she mumbled. “It’s okay. I’ve been preparing myself for this, I knew it was inevitable,” she said, looking down again.

“No, Lissy,” I took another ragged breath. “I talked to Bree,” I began.

“You kissed her,” she said. I grimaced.

Alyssa was right—I was the one who kissed Bree. We kissed each other. I closed my eyes and sighed, my breathing calming down from my run only to speed up again from anxiety. “I-It was a test,” I said. That wasn’t a lie, but it sounded so stupid. “But the past doesn’t mean a thing anymore, Lis. I want you to understand that,” I said shakily. She kept her head down. “Look at me, Alyssa Perry,” I said. She slowly lifted her head up, her eyes glossy with tears at me—the one she thought she was losing. “I’m not going anywhere,” I whispered, taking a step towards her. I placed my hands on either side of her head and brushed my thumbs over both of her cheeks. “It didn’t take me long to realize who I truly want,” I whispered. A tear fell from her eye anyway, but I quickly swiped it away.

“Don’t cry, I’m here,” I said softly, and then I leaned forward and pressed my lips to hers. It was passionate and long, and I sighed in satisfaction. This was different—the two I shared with Bree were weak and solemn, this was fresh and eccentric. I took a deep breath as our lips slowly moved together, and then I smiled. I gently pushed her back.

“Y-You’re sweaty, Vic,” she laughed against my mouth. I pulled away and gave her a sly smile.

“I just had the biggest work out of my life,” I said, ducking my head so the top of my sweaty hair was in her face.

“Ew!” she laughed, but, despite how disgusting I probably was, she pulled me back closer to her. I raised my head and kissed her again, knowing that this was exactly where I needed and most definitely where I wanted to be.

Notes

I wrote this a while ago and I just now realized that it is kind of short; sorry!
And, sorry, Bree didn't go ape-shit or start a fight or anything... I just didn't see that happening... not yet, at least (Sorry Scarlett I'm sure you were waiting for some action haha)

But, anyway...

Listen to the song “Oh Well Oh Well” by Mayday Parade whilst reading the Bree-Vic conversation and the feels might attack you. It happened to me :(
Actually no, all of Mayday Parade. I was listening to them while writing this… oh my fucking god I highly advise NOT doing that. Feels overload over here.

But, the decision has been made. Sorry if anyone is disappointed, but most people wanted Lissy and Vic, and I found myself agreeing. (Is there anyone who wanted Bree out there anymore?? haha)


I have a lot planned for the future, I can't wait to keep writing!
Xo