A/N: So I felt a little better today, but more angry because of my aunt so I'm writing my anger out. This chapter might suck.

~time-skip of 4 weeks. Brianna's pov~
"Hey Bri, time to get up," Jaime shook me awake gently. We were going to Tony's house again. It was 10am and I felt disgusting, I just wanted to sleep but the guys needed to see that I was "okay" even though I really wasn't. I hadn't eaten much since I found out. I was going to put my mask on and act like I was okay, Jaime and I weren't planning on having a kid anyway, we weren't even married.
I nodded and threw the blankets off me and dragged myself into the bathroom. I looked like shit, my hair was matted, I was pale, bloodshot eyes, and my bones stuck out everywhere. I weighed 77 pounds, 36 pounds underweight and 40 pounds less than before I found out. I got in the shower and scrubbed myself but couldn't get the gross feeling off me. I grabbed a towel and wrapped it around myself and walked back into the now empty bedroom. I noticed a broken piece of mirror in the carpet that Jaime had missed and grabbed it. I pulled out a pair of red skinny jeans, black combat boots, and a greyish white over-sized sweatshirt with a black tank-top and got changed and shoved the piece of glass into my pocket in case I needed it. I didn't plan on using it at the current moment but I had it just in case.
I went down the stairs and grabbed a water to get rid of the disgusting dryness of my mouth from sleeping for so long. I looked outside to see Jaime on the outside steps and walked up to him. "Ready to go?" I asked.
"Yeah, c'mon," he replied.
The whole ride there was quiet and I think we were both lost in thought until he pulled into Tony's driveway. I got out of the car and waited for Jaime and walked up the walkway with him. He didn't knock or anything, just pushed open the door. The guys all ran up and hugged me and I smiled at them, saying I was doing okay and having to reassure them abut 25 times. I then sat on the couch with the blanket over me and watched the news. Nothing great happened, there was a minor robbery, the stock market was doing good. I quickly fell asleep again.
I woke up probably an hour later to a sharp pain in my upper leg and looked up to see Jaime sitting on me. When he saw the pain on my face he jumped up, "what happened?"
"Nothing, my stomach just isn't happy," I lied, mumbling and looking down.
He shook his head and pulled the blanket off of me and saw something sticking up in my jeans pocket. He pulled out the piece of glass and gave me one of the worst looks I've ever seen on his face. "Really?" he asked.
I just looked at my hands, "I haven't used it."
He shook his head again, "and what's with this?" He asked putting his hand between my thighs and having room to move it around without hitting my jeans, then pulling the loose material. "They're supposed to stick to your legs, they're skinny jeans," he started yelling at that point. He lifted my sweatshirt off of me, also pulling me into a sitting position. He traced along every bone, my ribs, hip bones, collarbone, wrapped his hand around my upper arm with room to spare. I shrugged. "How much?" he questioned.
"How much what?" I asked him.
"How much did you loose?"
"40," I replied.
He walked away and I ran into the bathroom. I've ruined it, he won't want me anymore. I'm gross now, I could probably die at any second. Was I doing this on purpose? No, I had no appetite. I told myself that the last time I did this. I shook my head at all the thoughts going through my head and walked back out, not sure where to go. I walked into the living room but my sweatshirt wasn't there. Great. Jaime probably told all of them. I walked into the kitchen, Jaime holding my sweatshirt and the rest of the guys all staring at me. I flashed a fake smile and walked to the counter, grabbed a room-temperature water since I knew it would make me feel full, and sat next to Vic since that was the only open seat. They continued to stare at me, "what are you staring at?"
"Why couldn't you just talk to us?" Vic asked.
I flipped, "you don't understand what I'm going through! Sure it was Jaime's kid too. But it wasn't inside him! He wasn't going to feel it grow, or feel it kick, or watch his stomach get bigger, or endure all the pain through the birth. He wasn't the one who could think that it was possibly his fault that his baby just died. How do you think it feels that a human fucking being* just died...your own child...inside of you?! Huh? This is all I've wanted since I was a little kid and someone decided to take it away from me, just like that. My baby is gone! What did it ever do to deserve to die at a month old?!"
They all looked at me, their emotions changing constantly through my rant. Anger, sadness, guilt, but Jaime's stayed at anger the whole time. "This has turned you into a selfish jerk Brianna. It's all my kid died, poor me, pity me, I'm so sad. How do you think it felt to come home to you having a breakdown on the floor? Or how it feels to watch you mope around all day and slowly kill yourself? How much more weight do you think you can lose until you fall on the floor and die? How do you think I'm going to feel then?" he screamed back.
"If you really feel that way I'll go live by myself so when I fall on the floor and die," I put that in air-quotes, "no one will care and no one can stop me." I walked out of the house and started towards his house with tears streaming down my cheeks and to my neck. I was going to get my stuff and go find a place to live. Losing the baby separated us and changed everything.

(finally got this out after about 3-5 hours)